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CREATED:20260219T110017Z
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UID:10001739-1771480800-1771520400@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Turning Conflict Into Collaboration
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODY5OTE4MCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg2OTkxODAtdHVybmluZy1jb25mbGljdC1pbnRvLWNvbGxhYm9yYXRpb24uanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODY5OTE4MCUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 8) \nIt’s easy to collaborate when everyone agrees. The real test of teamwork is what happens when we don’t. \nIn this episode of Practicing Connection\, Jessica and Erin explore how to stay grounded and connected when collaboration gets tough. Erin shares a reflective practice that helps you rethink how you see the person on the “other side” of disagreement\, using social intelligence skills like awareness and generosity of perspective. \nDiscover how to shift from trying to “win” a disagreement to understanding what motivates others—and why that shift can strengthen both relationships and results. \n  \nLinks and resources from this episode: \n\n\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\nSee Dr. Robyn Keast talk about “Blue Box Thinking”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84YvXtc_VPg \n\n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF (00:00) \nHi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection podcast. I’m Jessica. Today we’ll be talking about how to work with people you disagree with\, and Erin’s going to be sharing a practice with us. Hi\, Erin. I’m really looking forward to learning more about this practice. What’s new with you this week? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (00:19) \nHi Jessica\, it is a fun topic to talk about. I mean\, it’s not the most fun topic\, but I think it’s an important topic\, so I’m glad we’re hitting it. \nAnd let’s see\, what’s new with me this week? So I’ve started in the morning when I’m prepping my workday\, I write a little agenda\, and then at the end of it\, to make it more fun\, I write in ‘win’ conditions. So if you’re into playing board games\, that’s like a common phrase for like\, “what do I need to do to win?’ \nI don’t know how common win conditions are outside of the gaming world\, so I thought I’d just kind of outline that for you. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (00:55) \nI thought you said wind conditions at first. So no\, I’ve never heard of this before. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (01:01) \nOkay\, so essentially it’s the list of things you need to check off in order to win a game. And I’ve been adding a list of win conditions to my day for like\, if I do these things\, then I won at work today. And it’s a little bit silly\, but I’ll regularly ask my husband like\, “Are you winning?” Like\, “Is it going well?” And then I realized I’m asking myself that question too. And I’ve never decided what winning means. \nAnd it’s very similar to deciding what ‘done’ means\, I think. You know\, it’s hard to feel sometimes\, especially when your work is lots of emailing or cerebral or text or all on a computer. It’s not like a physical thing. It can be hard to remember that you did it. So I’ve been making little boxes that I check off\, and I put a little sticker for each one that I win at. Sometimes I win at remembering to take a walk and drink water. And sometimes I win because I really finish a project on time. \nBut all of it has been shockingly helpful\, and I’m gonna ride that as long as it’s still giving me momentum. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (02:10) \nThat’s great. I like this version of\, it’s not the same thing\, but there’s a version that I feel like is a little bit similar that I used to do where I call that my ‘good job’ list\, where at the end of the day I would just\, and sometimes honestly\, there would be an item on there that was just like\, ‘I sent an email to this person.’ Sometimes it was something really tiny like that. And I know sometimes emails can take a long time\, like 30 minutes or more to write if it has to have a bunch of information\, but sometimes the email I was referencing in my good job list really had more to do with a small little email that I had just not gotten back to because we’re so bombarded all the time with so many messages. \nSo I love this. I love this version of that. And I like the question\, “Do you feel like you’re winning today?” And for me\, I’d probably have it be a gut reaction. And that’s the beauty of all these things is you can decide how to use them. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (03:09) \nAnd for me\, my gut reaction always tells me that I did a bad job because sometimes my brain is mean to me. And so I was like\, you know what? We’re not going to let my emotional side of my brain have a say in whether or not I’m winning. If I did the checklist\, I won. Done and dusted. \nSo I do have to like make myself only do actually achievable win lists\, because if it’s suddenly 15 things\, I can’t actually do 15 things in a day. But we can talk about this practice more some other time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (03:23) \nHmm. I like it. That’s why\, I’ve brought up before\, I think it was in a recent episode. I brought up that I sometimes like to use just one of those really small\, not – when I say really small post-it notes\, I don’t mean like the super tiny one x two ones. I’m talking about like the three x three square ones. I will put down on that little small post-it note the to-dos that I need to do that day in order to feel like I’m winning\, right? In order to feel like I won the day at a minimum\, I need to do these three or four things. \nI try not to make it any more than four things\, even though on those you can pretty much fit six to seven things\, I think. I’ve done it before. Yes\, I do know that. But yes\, anything that you can do to kind of help yourself get the things done you need to do and feel like you’re winning your day\, I think is a win. \nSo we’d love to hear how you’re winning. So drop us a line at practicingconnection@oneop.org. \nWe see and respond to every message and we can’t wait to hear from you. \n– break – \nSo Erin\, let’s learn more about how to work with people you disagree with. Can you tell us a little more about the practice you’ll be sharing\, and why you chose it? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (04:55) \nYes\, well\, we’ve been talking about collaboration a lot as a team. You’ll find out soon. And it got me thinking about\, you know\, we write a podcast where we have lots of Practicasts\, what are practical things to apply. And so that had me thinking a lot about what skills do you need to collaborate? And the most important one that I needed to learn was how to work with people who I disagree with. \nI am a passionate person. I sometimes have very strong opinions. I sometimes think I’m right about everything. Spoiler alert\, I’m not right about everything\, sadly. But learning how to navigate that has been a lifelong study. I spent lots of time doing it on school group projects\, which were the bane of my existence. And I was like\, ‘why do we have to do group projects?’ And my mom would always tell me\, “Because you have to work with people in life\, and you’ve got to figure out how to do it now.” \nPeople are more forgiving when you’re a child. Hopefully also we’re forgiving of adults who make mistakes. That’s not what I’m trying to say here. You’re laughing at me. Okay\, going back to talking about group projects. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (06:04) \nNot laughing at you\, Erin\, definitely with you. No\, can I just interject for a second though\, because this is making me think about – it’s interesting because there is also in being a person\, as you just said\, with sometimes having strong opinions and\, you know\, feeling like your pathway is maybe the right one that the group should be taking. Think about the power in that and how someone else might be like\, “Erin seems pretty confident about this.” \nAnd I’m not trying to make you feel bad here\, Erin\, but I’m just thinking like\, right\, “Erin seems pretty confident about this. Maybe I don’t need to share how I’m feeling\,” or whatever. Right? So anyway\, let’s talk about this. Sorry – \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (06:45) \nThat’s a good point. Just thinking about how are you showing up in a room and how is everybody else showing up in a room or a virtual room for your collaboration. Sometimes group projects are hard because people don’t want to be there\, or their workload is too big and they really can’t afford to be there. Or sometimes it’s because everybody is so passionate and they all have a different picture of what it looks like to be successful. \nAnd sometimes it’s hard to get into that. It just feels like this person’s telling you no all the time or they’re always fighting with you. And at least for me\, the path of least resistance for my brain is to villainize the person who I disagree with. And then suddenly they become a problem that I need to overcome\, or a road barrier\, and not a person to collaborate with. So what we’re going to talk about today is how to deal with that problem. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (07:45) \nYeah\, I appreciate that you brought that up too\, because you and I were talking before we started recording and I shared an example with you about someone that I was having some trouble with\, way in my past. And one of the things that came out of that was that I kind of villainized that person at first. I was really struggling. I was really fighting with them. All I kept hearing from them was ‘no\, no\, no\, no.’ \nAnd when I really dug into it and I worked on that relationship with them\, I realized\, ‘look\, I still disagreed with them. I didn’t enjoy their ways\, but I also really respected and understood where they were coming from.’ And I was able to get beyond that. \nSo let me ask you this then\, as you were looking into all of this\, I’m curious about how you were able to reconcile the idea of winning\, right? When two people are disagreeing and maybe both people feel very strongly that different pathways would be better for the project or for the situation. \nBoth of them want to win that argument. And so\, you know\, when we disagree on a pathway\, it could really cause a stalemate and progress could be stalled. How can we move beyond that? What were you finding? I’m excited to find out. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (09:00) \nYeah\, well\, I’ve got some bad news. Because the only thing you can change about the situation is your own response to the other person. You can’t force them to see your perspective. You can’t magically make them not part of the project. Look\, I hate this answer\, right? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (09:21) \nBut you can work to at least try to understand – you don’t have to agree with them – but try to understand where they’re coming from is one thing. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (09:27) \nExactly. Yeah\, that’s what I’m getting to. You’re spot on. I think what is frustrating about that is so often it feels like the other person isn’t doing that work too. And so it’s like\, ‘Man\, why do I have to do this labor and not this other person?’ That’s hard. That is hard to deal with. And I think it’s worth it because the benefits of collaboration and learning how to work with other people means that work can get done that otherwise would be impossible. \nAnd so you want to invest in making sometimes impossible seeming things happen\, figuring out\, ‘Okay\, how do I be aware of my own self\, be aware of what I’m doing and how I’m responding to people and how can I show up differently so that we can move past this roadblock?’ Because you can’t force them to show up differently\, but you can show up differently. So we’re going to talk about some social intelligence skills. \nI was not familiar with the phrase social intelligence until I was really digging into writing this episode. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (10:28) \nYou know\, I’ve studied via character strings. I took a bunch of their classes a long time ago\, so I’m very excited about this. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (10:35) \nWell\, they actually have my favorite definition of\, did they come up with this as a theory or did they just talk about it really well\, you know? Specifically the phrase social intelligence. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (10:42) \nIt comes from the field of positive psychology\, yeah\, and there’s been tons of research done in that kind of area. And I think it’s in the virtue of humanity. Yes. Which makes sense\, right? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (11:00) \nCool. Okay\, so if we just talked about a bunch of stuff and you’re like\, ‘I don’t know what social intelligence is\,’ a quick description from Character Strengths is\, \n“When a person knows what makes other people tick\, he or she is displaying social intelligence. They’re aware of the motives and feelings of themselves and others and how to fit into different social situations. They can feel comfortable and say the right thing\, whether they’re in the boardroom or the janitorial room\, in a school setting or on a construction site.” \nSocial intelligence involves two general components\, social awareness or what we sense about others and social facility\, which is what we do with our awareness. And our practice today is going to focus more on the awareness piece and how we are thinking about others. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (11:52) \nGreat. Let’s get into that practice then. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (11:55) \nOkay\, so this is a reflection for someone. I wrote it with this scenario in mind\, but you can expand it past that if this is not your scenario. But what I was imagining is you are already mid-project with a person that you have to collaborate with\, who you disagree with\, and they are driving you crazy. \nSo this is a thing you can do kind of silently inside of your own head during a meeting\, or just after a meeting\, or like an email chain\, some kind of interaction you’re having with this person who you disagree with when you’re feeling really agitated. Notice that\, and then do this reflection after you’ve kind of noticed some of that. \nSo the first step is deciding that you want to do something and committing to changing your mind about this person. That feels like kind of a silly first step\, but unless you commit to it\, you’re not going to do it. So step one is\, commit to do the work of figuring out how to get along with this person\, even if they aren’t doing it back. \nStep two is finding a reason why you want to commit to doing it\, because it can be challenging and it can take longer than you want it to. I personally find it really helpful to reflect on my values. They’re different for every person\, but I value doing good work. Usually I’m doing work that is creating something for other people. So I’ll think about the end user or who is going to benefit from us doing this work together and putting that reason in the front of your mind. So when you’re agitated and irritated\, you can say\, “I’m doing this because the outcome is worth it to me.” And if it’s not worth it to you\, that’s another conversation for a different Practicast. But find your reason\, find your value that’s making you want to commit. \nAnd then step three is\, observe your interactions with the person. This can either be while you’re in a meeting with them\, or it can be after the meeting. You can just kind of reflect on\, ‘What do you remember about how they showed up in the room? Do they have a lot of emotions? Were they not expressing a lot of emotions? What was their body language like? What did they share about what was happening in their day or in their workplace? Did they share anything at all? Did they just show up and be task and business focused? How were they showing up to the meeting? Was that what you expected?’ \nNotice those things. Another really helpful thing to observe from your interaction is\, ‘What is one thing\, no matter how small it is\, that you can respect about how this person showed up? What’s one thing that you wish you did?’ \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (14:41) \nIn that example that I was talking about before that I didn’t give any details on\, the thing that I was able to respect about them\, which completely changed to me\, changed our entire relationship\, because I really respected them for it was that they really felt a huge level of responsibility to be accountable for things that our department was doing. And so once I understood that\, I felt like I was able to\, you know\, navigate that conflict\, right? \nWe’re talking about disagreeing with someone. I disagreed with their methods\, but we weren’t really in conflict. We were actually in sync because we both felt that same responsibility\, but they felt it much more acutely than I did. And so once I understood that\, I felt like I was able to respect them as a person and respect them much more\, respect our relationship a lot more. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (15:37) \nYeah\, I love that. And a lot of this observation section is helping you notice what maybe you weren’t paying attention to. It’s being aware of what’s happening in the room\, both what the other person is doing\, but also internally inside of your own self. \nSo the last thing that I encourage you to observe is\, ‘What are you thinking about this person throughout the meeting? Are you automatically dismissing whatever they’re saying? Are you internally going\, “of course\,” or internally going\, “this again…” Are they going in circles? Are they talking about the same thing over and over again?’ \nI am guilty of this\, so no judgment. Just noticing your own responses to them. Are they positive? Are they negative? What evidence do you have to support the opinions that you’re having? Is it just an opinion that’s left over from a different meeting and you’re bringing it into this new meeting? So just observe and kind of notice you’re not being judgmental\, but you’re noticing what you’re bringing into the interaction and making note of it. \nAnd then the last step\, I think\, is the hardest step\, but it’s also the most important step. And I call it the imagination section. It is the part where you’re trying to imagine what is the most generous interpretation of why they’re acting the way they’re acting or why they have the opinion that they have. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (17:01) \nThat’s probably where my example fits\, is here\, except that it was my observation of our interactions that helped me to realize and imagine that the most generous reason for them having the opinion they have\, or acting the way they were acting\, was that they felt a ginormous amount of weight on them for our department’s accountability. Does that make sense? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (17:24) \nYeah\, that makes total sense. And I think what can be challenging about this is\, you know\, at least for me\, sometimes I just want to be mad. Like I want to be annoyed\, because it’s hard\, right? And it’s easier to be annoyed at the other person than like be stuck in the feeling of stuckness. \nAnd what I think is so helpful about imagination is it doesn’t even matter if the most generous reason is true or not. The point of imagining why the most generous reason for why someone might behave in the way they’re behaving is so that you can shift your resentment and frustration and be more open to this person\, maybe not being wrong\, or maybe seeing them as a person\, not a problem. The goal here is to shift how you’re thinking\, not to shift the person. And the goal of imagining is to see them as a fully complex person\, and to be able to be generous. \nI think there’s sometimes this idea that\, if I imagine them that way\, then that is the reality\, and I’m writing the reality for them. And that’s not what we’re saying at all. We’re just saying\, imagine why someone might have this opinion. And maybe you’re right and maybe you’re wrong. But being open to them having good reasons for why they are responding the way they were responding really helps\, I think\, in building patience. \nBut then also in building your own curiosity. And then maybe there’s like a secret step five where when you’re not in an agitated space\, you can circle back and be like\, “Hey\, what’s going on with you?” Or\, “I’ve noticed you seem really passionate and you really value this X\, Y\, Z thing. Can you tell me about that?” And that’s where you can really build a relationship with a person and not just have them be a problem. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (19:10) \nAnd I told the person that in the example I’ve been giving\, once I told them that I appreciated the amount of responsibility they felt and how they really valued the work we were doing\, I just told them that I appreciated that they felt that level of responsibility. Again\, I didn’t agree with the methods. Did not love the way they did things. And also that started to shift their opinion toward me because they felt noticed\, they felt seen\, they felt heard. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (19:39) \nSo you know how at the beginning of this meeting you were talking about how if I come in super definitive about my opinion\, maybe someone feels like there isn’t space for them to disagree? I think this is like me being\, I think sometimes I am this person that people need to reflect on to be less annoyed about. \nGosh. \nAnd not in a bad way\, but just in a like\, you know\, interacting with people who are different\, there’s conflict\, there’s friction there. And that I think also helps me show up differently. \nAnd one of my personal values is kindness. I think that’s really important. I try to think through how can I show up in a way that’s more kind. And so this has also been really helpful in shifting my own ways of being in a group. This practice really focuses on helping you shift your thinking about another person. But it has side benefits of shifting your own view of yourself and being kinder and more patient with yourself too. It’s pretty good stuff. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (20:35) \nYeah. And the last thing that I want to bring up\, just because it comes up so commonly and I’ve seen it over and over in my career. And also\, you know\, given that I’ve done a lot of interpersonal work with groups\, one thing that comes up over and over that this is really reminding me of is that idea of the people who’ve been around a while saying\, “But we’ve done that before\, we’ve done that before.” And it feels like it’s a ‘no\, no\, no\, no\, no’ constantly\, when people are bringing up ideas. \nAnd I’ve talked with a number of people who have been very concerned over the years about how they come off\, like folks who know that they’re the ones who are always like\, “Well\, we did that once before\, we already did that.” And I would say most of the time\, at least of the ones I’ve talked to\, they don’t want to do that. What they’re looking for is new solutions that their experience could be respected and inquired about and gotten curious about\, and like thinking about what new things we could all come up with. \nThat might utilize some of that knowledge\, but also utilize the new ideas coming in. And I’ve heard from a lot of people who are like\, “I’m not trying to say no\, no\, no to everything. It’s just\, we’ve learned a lot from what we’ve tried in the past. And so could we maybe just come together and say\, ‘Hey\, what have you learned from doing this in the past? We learned all these things. And what are your new ideas? Let’s try to mash all of this up together and see what new solutions we can come up with.’” \nSo it’s slightly\, I mean it’s on topic\, slightly off topic\, but I wanted to bring that up because I think it’s a common point where people are feeling really passionate about the work you’re all doing together\, but some people want to go one pathway\, some people want to go another pathway\, or some people want to go one pathway\, but they feel like the other people are just constantly telling them no\, no\, no\, no. And I think that there’s a way around all of that for us to come together. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (22:25) \nYes\, that is a great example. Thank you so much for sharing it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (22:29) \nThank you for guiding us through. That’s a really great thought experiment. \nSo commit to doing the work. Find a value or reason that you want to do it. Observe your interactions with the person or people that you’re feeling at odds with. And then imagine the most generous reason for them to have the opinion they have. What was that fifth bonus one? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (22:52) \nThe fifth bonus one was engaging in a conversation about them as a person\, where you acknowledge the thing you respect about them. Or notice\, ‘Hey\, it seems like you really value XYZ. Can you tell me more about that?’ \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (23:08) \nYes. That’s great. I think that’s a great spot to stop this practice. Thanks so much\, Erin. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA (23:14) \nThank you! \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (23:15) \nWell\, that’s it for this episode. Thanks for joining us. If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend. We’ll be back next week with a new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/turning-conflict-into-collaboration/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260212T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260212T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260212T110028Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260428T200153Z
UID:10001735-1770876000-1770915600@oneop.org
SUMMARY:How We Work Together: A Simple Practice for Better Collaboration
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODY1MzM1NSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg2NTMzNTUtaG93LXdlLXdvcmstdG9nZXRoZXItYS1zaW1wbGUtcHJhY3RpY2UtZm9yLWJldHRlci1jb2xsYWJvcmF0aW9uLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTg2NTMzNTUlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 7) \nAre you really collaborating – or just coordinating?  \nThis episode offers a short reflection to help you notice where you are on the spectrum and make one small shift toward true collaboration. \nIn this episode of Practicing Connection\, Erin and Jessica use “blue box thinking” as a backdrop to explore the spectrum of ways we work together – competition\, cooperation\, coordination\, and collaboration – and introduce a simple practice called “Shift the Box.” \nYou’ll learn how to quickly name where you are on that spectrum in any situation\, notice when you’re stuck in status and control\, and choose one small action that moves you closer to genuine collaboration and shared power. \nLinks and resources from this episode: \n\n\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\nSee Dr. Robyn Keast talk about “Blue Box Thinking”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=84YvXtc_VPg \n\n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]ERIN CARLSON RIVERA: [00:00:00] Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Erin. Today we’re going to talk about how our assumptions about roles and power can get in the way of collaboration\, and how a simple reflection practice can help us shift into a more collaborative way of working together. \nHi Jessica. How are you doing today? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I’m doing pretty good. It’s toward the end of the day and I’m kind of gearing up to get ready for my new volunteer gig. My first time helping out in community theater. So that’s been kind of a fun experience. I’ve only been to one rehearsal so far. Today’s the second one. \nI’m not in\, I wanna be clear\, I’m not acting. But I’m helping out and it’s been kind of fun to be like a point person to help out. I kind of like being in the middle of all that action. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: That sounds so exciting. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I know you have a background in theater a little bit. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: That I think sounds a [00:01:00] little bit more than what I actually did. I did a lot of children’s theater as a kid and through high school. But background in theater makes it sound a little bit more glamorous than it was. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Okay\, I get it. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: But I understand there’s a certain kind of synergy and energy of doing a show. Even if you’re just on the tech – just on the tech; the tech are awesome. If you’re on tech\, even if you’re not in the show\, there’s still this exciting energy because it’s this really cool space of collaboration that you almost don’t get anywhere else. So I’m excited for you. I can’t wait to hear all about it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, I will tell you more as the days unfold\, as you probably know\, it’s a chaotic time right now. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Of course. All right\, so today we’re focusing on collaboration\, and the ways we move\, sometimes without even noticing\, from competition\, to cooperation\, to coordination\, to true collaboration. And then you’re going to guide us through a practice. Can you share a little bit more about the practice and why you chose it?[00:02:00]\nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, absolutely. I wanna start though with a little bit of background on this thing I’m going to be talking about today called Blue Box Thinking. We’ve talked about it on the podcast before\, and it comes from a model of inter-organizational relationships that shows different ways groups work together: competition\, cooperation\, coordination\, collaboration and then finally conglomeration\, where everything kind of really comes together and ends up consolidating. \nAs originally presented by Dr. Robin Keast from Southern Cross University\, the diagram she was using as she was going around presenting about this had randomly colored boxes to represent different organizations and how they’re connected. \nBut what she was finding while presenting about the model was that what people often do is fixate on the one box that appears to be on top. And in this case it just happened to be always blue\, right? The blue box was always showing up on top on these slides\, on her slide deck. [00:03:00]\nAnd so people kept asking her\, wait\, is my organization the blue box? Am I the blue box? Should I be the blue box? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Mm-hmm. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And so that pull toward wanting to be the box in charge or you know\, with quotes “in charge\,” is what we’re calling ‘blue box thinking.’ And it keeps our attention on status and position instead of on the processes and relationships that actually make collaboration work. \nAnd so the practice I’m sharing today is called ‘Shift the Box.’ It’s just a name that was made up for this. I chose it because blue box thinking tends to pull our attention toward position. Like\, who’s in charge\, who has the power? When collaboration really depends on process and relationships\, right? \nLike what can we create together that we maybe couldn’t have created if we weren’t together? And so this practice helps us gently move our focus from\, where am I on the chart\, [00:04:00] to\, how can we share power and create something together? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Okay. Well that’s exciting\, I love that it doesn’t ask people to jump straight into having perfect collaboration. It just invites one small shift to how we’re relating to each other. I think that’s really exciting. All right. Let’s get into it. Tell us about this practice. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Alright\, so first\, you’re going to want to start of course by thinking of a real situation where you’re working with others. So maybe it’s your team\, maybe it’s you’re just thinking of your team meeting\, you know\, the situation of your team meeting. \nMaybe it’s a community collaborative effort\, or any situation where you’re working with others\, right? Hold that situation in your mind and ask yourself who’s involved and what are we trying to do together? \nThen I want you to think about which of those Cs is your group currently in? The C’s we mentioned were competition\, cooperation\, [00:05:00] coordination\, collaboration\, which I’ll go into in a second. \nI want you to ask yourself\, which of these best describes how we’re working together right now? \nSo just to give you a few ideas of what each of these looks like: Competition. So your group might be in competition mode if you or other group members are mostly protecting their own interests or ideas\, right? You’re not sharing anything\, everyone’s trying to be on top. \nCooperation. You might be in cooperation mode if members are just sharing information\, right? Just strict information sharing or helping each other briefly on occasion. \nYou might be in coordination if the group is working toward a shared goal\, but mostly staying in your own lanes\, right? ‘My organization only does these things\, your organization only does those things. I’m only going to agree to do things that my organization does.’ Rather than kind of mixing up the ideas a little bit \nAnd in [00:06:00] collaboration\, you might be in collaboration if you’re sharing power\, resources\, and ideas to co-create something that you wouldn’t create alone. That each of your organizations are not likely to create alone. \nSo there are no wrong answers. Just notice where you are without judgment. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Okay. I like that. The expectation is not that you should always be collaborating. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Right. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: You know\, I think about in school where it’s like\, ‘you always have to share\, you always have to get along\,’ and sometimes it’s not helpful. And I love that competition or coordination might be exactly the right option\, and that you’re stopping to name that. That’s great. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. Sometimes you just need an information exchange. That’s all you need\, and that’s okay. The point really is awareness\, so not grading ourselves or judging where the group is at. \nSo step three then is to notice your own personal blue box thinking [00:07:00] impulses. So maybe that’s\, ‘I wish I were the one making the decision\,’ or maybe it’s\, ‘They should really put me in charge of this.’ \nOr maybe it’s\, ‘Why is that person in charge or taking charge of this?’ And then finally\, maybe it’s\, ‘We just need someone at the top to decide.’ \nOr interestingly\, it could be the opposite\, right? This could be where you might suppress your own voice by thinking\, ‘Oh\, someone else is in charge. It’s not my place to speak up\,’ right? And that’s not healthy either. \nSo just notice where you might be focusing on position or status\, instead of process and relationship again. No judgment. You are just observing and learning right now. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, this feels powerful because it normalizes a lot of those thoughts. Many of us\, well\, okay\, many of us were trained to look at there’s just one person who’s in charge\, and that’s [00:08:00] it. So it makes sense that we would automatically just think\, ‘Well\, someone needs to just make this decision.’ \nAnd I don’t know\, I think if you spend a lot of time in any job as a grownup\, most of them have\, you know\, hierarchies and decision makers and leadership teams. And so it can get really easy to think\, ‘Well\, someone else should be making this choice\,’ and then not sharing what you’re thinking. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: You know\, I’ve been in coalition meetings before where I’ve seen a question get asked of the group\, right? So someone was asking\, maybe it was a contractor came in to share some updates\, and they ask everyone a question. And I’ve seen literally everyone look toward the person in the room that had that positional or financial power\, even though that person was just a member of the coalition\, they weren’t the person in charge\, right? \nAnd so things like that matter too\, we’re doing this naturally. But I think being more aware of when that’s happening can be really helpful [00:09:00] in moving from a place where maybe you’re just coordinating\, but you feel like the group could be doing more. \nSo just being aware of where you’re at will help you with the next step here. So the last step then is to ask yourself\, ‘What is one small shift I can make to move this situation closer to collaboration?’ \nSo depending on where you’re at\, of course\, I mean\, if you feel like the group is where it needs to be right now\, then leave it be. But if the group needs to shift\, then that might look like moving from competition to cooperation. Maybe the action you could take is sharing a piece of information or a perspective that you’ve been holding back. \nIf it’s moving from cooperation to coordination\, maybe that’s offering to align your efforts toward a shared goal instead of working in parallel with each other. And when moving from coordination to collaboration\, maybe that’s inviting others into planning or decision making\, or asking what could we create together that none of us could [00:10:00] create alone. \nAnd I just want to add a bonus here\, because another step you could take that would still make a small shift is choosing a relationship to strengthen within the group. So maybe choosing to listen more deeply to another person\, or maybe expressing appreciation for their contribution\, publicly or privately\, or checking in with them outside your meetings\, right? \nEven just choosing to strengthen a relationship with one of the people in the group will help with some of these shifts as well. So just choose one concrete action that you could take in this situation\, something small enough that you could try it in the next week. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, I love that. I think often when you’re caught in these tense spaces where all of the coalition people haven’t quite landed on how we’re going to work together\, it can really feel like you need to redesign the whole coalition\, the whole organization\, the whole structure. \nIt feels like\, [00:11:00] ‘Oh\, we gotta tear it all down and build over. It’s not working.” But actually it might just take all of us taking a bunch of tiny steps. And I love that you gave some really concrete actionable ones. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. I mean\, we don’t have to be taking big leaps here. We can grow collaborative efforts in really small shifts. We can grow it one relationship at a time\, one conversation at a time. We can share one piece of information at a time\, right? All these little things that we can do to improve our collaboration. \nSo that’s the practice. I mean\, this is something you can do in a few minutes\, and you can use it as a check-in at any point in your project. And over time\, you should be able to notice when you’re stuck in that blue box thinking and move toward more shared power\, stronger relationships\, and authentic collaboration. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Thanks so much for sharing that Jessica. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Very happy to. I have been a big fan of Robin Keith for a long time\, so I love sharing about Blue Box thinking. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: That’s it for this episode. Thank you for [00:12:00] joining us. If this conversation resonated with you\, click the share button in your podcast app. \nWe’ll be back next week with a new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/how-we-work-together/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260122T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260122T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260205T110037Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260216T194152Z
UID:10001728-1769061600-1769101200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Reframing Feedback: A Practice for Receiving Criticism Well
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODYwNDMyNCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg2MDQzMjQtcmVmcmFtaW5nLWZlZWRiYWNrLWEtcHJhY3RpY2UtZm9yLXJlY2VpdmluZy1jcml0aWNpc20td2VsbC5qcyUzRmNvbnRhaW5lcl9pZCUzRGJ1enpzcHJvdXQtcGxheWVyLTE4NjA0MzI0JTI2cGxheWVyJTNEc21hbGwlMjIlMjB0eXBlJTNEJTIydGV4dCUyRmphdmFzY3JpcHQlMjIlMjBjaGFyc2V0JTNEJTIydXRmLTglMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 6) \nNegative feedback can feel like a punch in the gut – but what if you could shift your mindset to see it as useful data instead of personal failure? \nMost of us cringe when we hear “I have some feedback for you.” But learning to receive feedback well is one of the most powerful skills you can build for collaboration and growth. \nIn this episode of Practicing Connection\, Jessica and Erin talk about how to prepare your mindset\, identify which feedback deserves your attention\, and turn even tough conversations into moments of learning. \nErin also shares a practical approach you can use the next time feedback catches you off guard – helping you respond with curiosity instead of defensiveness. \nListen in to find new ways to make feedback feel less threatening\, and more like an investment in your growth. \nLinks and resources from this episode: \n\nReframing Feedback Handout\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”][00:00:00]\nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica\, my new co-host is here as well. Today we’ll be talking about how to receive negative feedback\, and Erin’s gonna be sharing a practice with us. Hi Erin\, how are you? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Hi Jessica. I’m having fun! \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Great! \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: I wasn’t expecting to be this excited to actually be recording things\, so this is kind of fun. Plus it’s finally sunny again here in Wisconsin\, which is a treat. We’ve had a string of all of the temperatures in the negatives. We had an exploding tree watch warning from the weather people recently\, so no trees exploded in my neighborhood. \nI am very relieved\, and I’m very relieved that it’s a little bit warmer\, and that we have sunshine again. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that is very good. I have been hibernating\, reading a lot more than I [00:01:00] have in the past several years. I’m just chewing through the books and that’s been awesome. Both reading fiction and nonfiction as well. It’s something I used to do a lot more of and I’ve picked it back up again\, and that has been really feeding my soul lately. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Oh\, that’s wonderful. I love when you can kind of return to something that was joyful that you fell out of the habit of\, that’s such a fun thing to be able to do. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, we’d love to hear what’s inspiring you. So please drop us a line at practicingconnection@oneop.org. We see and respond to every message and can’t wait to hear from you. \n– break – \nSo let’s learn more about how to receive negative feedback. Erin\, can you tell us a little more about what you’ll be sharing and the practice you’re going to be sharing\, and why you chose it? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah. Well\, I’m gonna start with why I chose it. It is\, for a lot of [00:02:00] people\, performance evaluation season. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: So while not everybody does performance evaluations in January\, a lot of people do. So\, I wanted to kind of share it in a timely manner. Also I am new to a job\, so I’m getting a lot of feedback\, and I’ve had to spend some time thinking about how do I – don’t make that face\, Jessica\, it’s not all bad! \nBut I have been getting lots of feedback and so I’ve been thinking a lot about\, “How can I use this well?” And so I wanted to share some of that with you today. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: One thing I’d love to say though\, that’s such a good point. Sometimes it’s just hard to receive feedback\, period. Whether negative or neutral\, or even positive sometimes. And I think any feedback at all can feel negative sometimes. I mean\, unless someone’s like\, ‘you’re wonderful\, great job\,’ or whatever. That doesn’t feel negative\, hopefully ever. But I mean\, any like neutral feedback\, or collaborative feedback\, [00:03:00] it can feel negative even when it’s not. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, I think especially if you’re really fatigued or overwhelmed\, sometimes feedback feels like just one more thing you have to carry and process and manage. And it’s like a little straw on your camel back and you’re like\, “I don’t know how many more of these I could take.” Yes\, this is exactly why I wanted to talk about this today. \nSo\, I don’t really enjoy negative feedback. I don’t think I know anybody who does\, but I have been able to see how changing how I respond to negative feedback can make it go from ‘one more thing I have to manage’ to an opportunity to build connection with the people that I work with\, especially when I’m on teams\, especially when I’m collaborating. \nIf I’m able to respond well to negative feedback\, it can build trust\, which I find really exciting. \nSo today I want to talk about how do we think about negative [00:04:00] feedback mindset shifts\, and then I’ll walk you through a practice. And I think of it as like a standard script that I can use if I’m surprised\, because sometimes you know you’re going to get feedback\, for example a performance evaluation\, and sometimes it comes completely out of the blue. They don’t ask your permission\, they don’t tell you they want to talk to you. It’s just\, someone comes up to your cubicle\, “Hey\, I wanna talk to you. You shouldn’t do this thing.” And you’re like… \nSo I want to give you a plan for how you’re going to respond to surprise\, negative feedback\, so that in the moment you don’t have to decide how to respond. \nYou’ve already kind of pre-thought about\, ‘here’s a thing I can do\,’ and sound professional. And it can be trust building and collaborative\, even if I’m having a bad day. So that’s my hope. So that’s where we’re heading today. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, I’m really glad that we’re talking about this. You know\, finding ways to positively respond to negative feedback has helped mea lot. Even [00:05:00] though I’m not always still good at it\, I have figured out a couple things that I can do to help. \nSo like just listening for what values are surfacing while the person’s giving you feedback or reflecting on that interaction and thinking about what values we’re surfacing. \nOr just allowing myself some time to consider the feedback before responding when you can\, right. Like you just said\, sometimes you’re just getting it in the moment\, you’re getting the feedback in the moment or\, you know\, the person said\, “We need to meet.” Period. And you start anticipating what that might be. \nSo getting negative feedback can be awkward and uncomfortable\, but it’s also an opportunity to make meaningful changes. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yes\, that’s exactly why it’s worth doing a little bit of work. So I actually encourage people to do prep work before you’re in the moment of receiving negative feedback. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Like right now. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yes. Right now. Okay\, I mean maybe once the podcast is over\, but [00:06:00] schedule time now before you’ve even worried about getting negative feedback\, to think about how you respond to feedback. \nAnd this is one of those\, ‘think about thinking’ things\, that is so annoying\, and it’s like\, ‘I have to have a task where I think about how I’m thinking.’ \nAnd yes\, yes you do. It will be so helpful. I promise it’s worth it. There are several things that I found helpful and we’re going to talk about one of the mindset shifts first. And this is helping yourself getting out of all or nothing thinking. \nI see this in myself often when I get negative feedback. I think if there’s negative feedback about one thing\, it means every single thing that I’ve done is terrible. And that’s very\, very rarely the case. There’s almost never where someone’s like\, “We need to throw out this entire thing. There is nothing worth keeping here.” Most of the time\, it’s like a couple of tweaks\, or maybe up to like 20% of a thing needs tweaking or changing\, or\, “Oh\, we gotta mash it with this thing over here.” \nSo it is [00:07:00] really easy to hear one bad thing and think that everything is wrong\, but it’s a really powerful shift when you can go from thinking\, ‘If one thing is wrong\, I did a bad job\,’ to\, ‘90% of this is ready to go\, and now I know what 10% needs work.’ \nIs that an easy shift? No. Is it a helpful shift? Yes. \nHave you ever noticed that Jessica\, or dealt with this shift? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yes. Well\, the thing is\, I don’t know that I tend to think everything wrong\, it really depends on the context sometimes. But one of the ways I’ve noticed this is in writing. I find words to be very sacred\, and so I used to be that when I wrote something and I asked somebody to review it\, it was really hard for me to see lots of red lines or\, you know\, lots of red text if you’re using the track changes or whatever it is\, you know\, it used to be really hard for me. \nAnd then\, I discovered that\, no\, no\, no\, it was\, [00:08:00] you know\, some red text\, some red lines. And the red lines were not ‘get rid of this immediately\, it sucks.’ The red lines were challenging me to think and make it a little better. And frankly\, I really now have come to\, you know\, appreciate that feedback. \nBut what I used to see when I would write something\, someone needed to edit it\, I used to see\, ‘Oh\, there’s so many comments on here that the whole thing is just terrible.’ And then I started to do a lot more editing\, and it took me maybe just a couple of times where I was like\, ‘Oh\, this is awesome. They’re making my work more awesome.’ \nAnd so I don’t know if that’s exactly the shift you’re talking about\, but it started to help me understand that it doesn’t matter even if they have red lines on every single paragraph\, which was never the case. But even if that happened on every [00:09:00] paragraph\, it was not them telling me it all sucks. It was them saying\, “Hey\, I see opportunity here\, and here’s my thought on how it could be a little better.” Which was awesome. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: I love that. I love the idea of\, “They’re helping me be more awesome.” What a great mental catchphrase! \nI think a lot about\, ‘What script is my brain running? What is it telling me?’ And so if I can switch it from\, ‘They’re telling me it’s bad\,’ to\, ‘They’re helping me be more awesome\,’ what a gift. \nSpeaking of gifts\, another gift has to do with a mindset shift. It wasn’t until I started thinking about feedback that I realized how much doing theater as a child was a huge gift to me\, and one of those was receiving negative feedback. It made it easier for me. \nWere there ever any times someone was talking about performance anxiety for giving a speech and they were talking about\, okay\, what sensations are happening in your body? When else did you feel those? And then they were [00:10:00] talking about rollercoasters and how a lot of what you feel\, like anxious\, kind of your breath changes\, it’s the same thing that happens right before going on one\, apparently for some people. \nI find rollercoasters terrifying\, but for some people it’s like this anticipation. And so they’re able to mentally feel the anxiety in their body and say\, ‘Oh\, this is also what excitement feels like.’ And then they’re less scared\, and they’re more able to be excited about doing a scary thing\, not just scared of doing a scary thing. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, as someone who really loves rollercoasters\, I concur with that. The risk is worth the reward\, for sure. Not the risk\, but the\, you know\, the anxiety\, and the – it’s excitement/anxiety. You’re excited\, but you’re also a little scared\, and it’s amazing. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah. And isn’t that a much more pleasant feeling than just being terrified. So I thought\, ‘Okay\, obviously that wasn’t gonna work for me thinking about roller coasters\, because I still cry every time I go on a roller coaster.’ And you [00:11:00] know\, like sometimes I need to cry. It’s very cathartic\, it’s great\, but I was like\, ‘Okay\, I don’t want to cry when I get negative feedback from my coworkers\,’ right. \nSo I was like what are some other examples where I can do that\, a mirroring thing and mentally tell myself\, “Oh\, it’s like this situation. I’m safe in this situation. You don’t have to be scared right now.” And for me\, that was in theater. I think you’ve also done some theater stuff. Are you familiar with “getting notes?” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, yeah\, absolutely. Like\, in my case\, where I was doing it\, it was for an improv group\, and we got notes mostly during\, we got “side coaching\,” a lot of times they called it. But\, yeah\, we got notes during our rehearsal. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Sure. That’s fair. Okay. So I didn’t do improv\, I did more traditional theater. And there’s\, before you do your big performance\, you have a dress rehearsal where you’re in costume\, you run it as if there’s an audience and if there’s a show\, and the director almost always is taking tons of notes. \nAnd then after you’ve run through the whole [00:12:00] show\, they bring everybody together\, you all sit on stage and the director just runs through the show from top to bottom and says every single thing\, good or bad\, that they thought about while running the rehearsal. And so you hear everybody’s feedback\, you hear the good stuff\, you hear the bad stuff. \nAnd I don’t know what it was. Maybe it was just because everybody’s there. But that was never scary to me. Maybe it was ’cause I did children’s theater and they were really nice about it! \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Maybe\, because you were all getting feedback at the same time together. We’re going to be good and bad. Maybe someone only got good notes because they had a fantastic rehearsal. I don’t know. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, well\, I think too\, some of it was\, there was not time to go in depth on anything\, so it was just like\, “Hey\, this wasn’t working. Try this next time.” And so it was very direct and specific. And so that was all really helpful for me. So I’ve started to think about\, ‘Oh\, maybe that is the mental attitude that I want to have when I’m receiving negative feedback. Think of it as I’m getting notes in a show.’ \nAnd [00:13:00] sometimes I didn’t agree with the director’s feedback. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: And that was okay. So that gave me kind of a framework where I’m taking myself out of having my like “flight or fight” response into\, “Oh\, I’m getting notes at a show.” \nAnd now I will admit\, not everybody does theater and not everybody had that experience with theater\, but I bet that everybody has some experience somewhere where they got negative feedback and it wasn’t hard. \nLike maybe you really love cooking and you have somebody taste test it\, or you are really into fitness and you’re used to having somebody coach your form at the gym \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: You love trying out new outfits and you get feedback on them from your friends. Whatever your thing is\, I bet there’s somewhere in your life where you can get feedback and it doesn’t feel scary. \nAnd so thinking about putting on that mindset when you’re getting feedback can be such a helpful pivot. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I really love this and because\, I have not had the same frame of reference as [00:14:00] you\, but a similar point of reference – I get that feeling\, and I love that you brought up all those other examples of where we might have experienced that. \nLike I also have\, you know\, I have some friends where if they told me something didn’t look good on me\, I might have a bigger problem with it than other friends\, if they told me that. And you know\, now probably anyone could tell me anything and it wouldn’t bother me\, when it comes to what I’m wearing. \nBut I just mean\, I love that you brought up all those different possible examples\, and if people can kind of reflect back on when you received feedback. And it wasn’t difficult for you to receive that feedback and get back in touch with that feeling and that memory. That’s a really powerful thing. \nAnd\, so\, let’s get into the final piece that you have for us\, because the script you were talking about earlier\, I’d like to hear more about that. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Sure. I love a script. I don’t fight or flight. I tend to freeze\, which is not helpful. [00:15:00] I mean\, it is helpful sometimes\, but it can be very frustrating. \nSo I often think that if I make a plan beforehand that I don’t have to freeze. If you’re a person who fights\, then you’re like\, ‘I don’t have to decide how nice to be right now.’ \nYou could just go with your plan. Right? Like\, I think it’s applicable even if you’re not a freezer. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: But this is what I call a “method for the moment.” The first step is to just take a breath\, to just pause. And this can be like a two second pause\, but pause just to remind yourself\, “Hey\, I’m okay.” \nNumber two is quickly discerning\, is this someone whose opinion matters to me? And sometimes you do not like this person at all. You think their advice is terrible\, but they’re your supervisor or they’re an important collaborator. So even if you think their advice is terrible\, they’re still somebody whose opinion matters because you’re trying to maintain a relationship with them. \nIf you do care about their opinion\, [00:16:00] that’s an opportunity to get curious. If you have capacity\, ask a couple of questions. Some good ones are\, “Can you tell me more about why you think that? Can you give me some examples to reference for what you think it should look like?” Often people’s feedback is very vague\, even when it’s negative. \nWhich is shocking\, like you’re used to it being really specific\, but sometimes it’s just\, I don’t know\, you’re too angry or something\, and you’re like\, “Oh\, can you tell me more about\, do you have an example? Can you tell me what you think I should aim for?” \nIf you don’t care about their opinion\, you can just say\, “Oh\, thank you for sharing that with me. I’ve got to move on regardless.” \nSo this is kind of where there’s like a bit of a divergence. You decide if you care about their opinion. If you do\, be curious\, if you don’t\, say thank you. Once you’re done being curious\, you can also just say thank you. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I just wanted\, I’m wondering if\, say you do care about their opinion\, but you don’t feel any reason\, like you feel like the feedback was fair and that they gave [00:17:00] you enough information. Can you just go right to thanking them? Or should you get curious no matter what? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: I\, you know\, I think being curious is for your benefit. So if you feel like they gave you feedback that is valid\, true\, fair\, and helpful\, and you don’t need more information to do something with it\, you could just say\, “Wow\, thank you so much for telling me that\,” and move on. The curiosity is just there for you to get something meaningful out of the interaction\, if it’s a person you trust\, who doesn’t have the skill to give you the specifics you need. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: The other thing that I recommend is thank them for their feedback\, but don’t commit to doing anything immediately \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I like that\, that’s great. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Because so many people\, if you don’t have a lot of practice being calm while you receive negative feedback\, are in this really heightened state of like\, almost panic sometimes. \nAnd so if you just say\, “Hey\, thank you for letting me know that. Can I circle back with you after I’ve had some time to think [00:18:00] about it?” That’s an easy script. Most people respect that. If they don’t\, there’s a bigger issue there. \nAnd I think what’s really helpful about that is then you have time\, once they’re not looking at you\, to kind of think through\, ‘Okay\, is there anything I want to change or do differently in response to this feedback?’ \nAnd then you can circle back and just say\, “Thanks again for that feedback. In the future I’d like to try doing this.” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And you can come up with your own plan. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, exactly. I really encourage people to come up with a plan with somebody else. If you have the opportunity and you don’t want to just come up with a plan on your own\, find a buddy to make a plan with\, because I think so often there’s this pressure to immediately say\, ‘Oh\, I have to immediately tell somebody.’ \nAnd the thing is like in most cases\, you don’t need to immediately tell somebody\, ‘Oh\, I’m gonna completely change my life.’ \nSo once you’ve thanked them and the conversation is over\, make a follow-up plan. Decide if you need [00:19:00] one\, and then\, if you’re not quite sure what you want to do in response to the feedback\, I have a couple of questions you can ask yourself\, which is\, “What is one thing I could do differently or try? Who is a person I could ask for advice\, coaching or mentorship about this?” And\, “Who is someone who knows me well enough\, who I trust enough who can fact check this for me? \nSometimes people are wrong. Sometimes your response is not proportional to their feedback. So that’s kind of a place where you can pause and reflect while you’re making your plan\, and get input from people you trust. \nAnd that’s it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That might happen the most to me. I’ll get feedback and I like\, in my head\, the feedback was a hundred times different than when I go back a day or two later and I look at it again\, and I’m like\, ‘Oh\, this actually isn’t a big deal.’ \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yes. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I said one of my strategies I found is I need a little bit of time\, and then I can go back and read it again [00:20:00] and we’re good. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, absolutely. And that is again\, why I tell people\, start by taking a breath. Start by deciding if this opinion matters. Then\, be curious\, then thank them\, then end the conversation. \nAnd I think that’s really the gift for me\, is realizing negative feedback doesn’t have to turn into a fight\, and it doesn’t have to turn into me setting a bunch of goals with a person spontaneously. \nIt can just be\, ‘Oh\, thank you for sharing that with me. I will go reflect on that.’ And then it’s over\, right. \nIt doesn’t have to be long. And I think a lot of people are just so afraid that it’s going to be a big\, terrible thing. Prepare yourself for maybe it’s not so bad. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Right. I mean\, I’m going to overanalyze it enough in my head anyway. \nNot with these new tools though\, and the new mindsets! So thank you so much for sharing this\, Erin. And I think there’s going to be a download available that we’ll have some of this? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, I realize that this method is not like five words that you can bullet point on your hand\, [00:21:00] so I’ll make a little printout that you can have on hand to read through\, if that helps you remember stuff better. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. Thank you. And we’ll link to that in the show notes. \nWell\, that’s it for this episode. Thanks so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend. We’ll be back next week with a new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/reframing-feedback/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260122T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260122T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260129T110031Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260129T223651Z
UID:10001724-1769061600-1769101200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:From One Season to the Next: A New Chapter for Practicing Connection
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODU3MzAyNyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg1NzMwMjctZnJvbS1vbmUtc2Vhc29uLXRvLXRoZS1uZXh0LWEtbmV3LWNoYXB0ZXItZm9yLXByYWN0aWNpbmctY29ubmVjdGlvbi5qcyUzRmNvbnRhaW5lcl9pZCUzRGJ1enpzcHJvdXQtcGxheWVyLTE4NTczMDI3JTI2cGxheWVyJTNEc21hbGwlMjIlMjB0eXBlJTNEJTIydGV4dCUyRmphdmFzY3JpcHQlMjIlMjBjaGFyc2V0JTNEJTIydXRmLTglMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 5) \nChange is part of every journey – even the ones we love most.  \nIn this episode\, Jessica Beckendorf welcomes new co-host Erin Carlson Rivera\, and shares parting reflections from longtime co-host Coral Owen. Together\, they explore how slowing down\, creating space\, and staying curious can help us stay connected through seasons of change. \nChange is both inevitable and deeply human – and this special episode is all about how we navigate it together. \nJoin us for an episode that honors the past\, embraces the next chapter\, and reminds us that connection is something we can keep practicing – no matter where we are in the journey. \nCommunity Challenge: \nThis week\, take a moment to name the space you’re in right now – not just what you’re doing\, but what you’re experiencing. Maybe it’s a transition\, a settling-in\, or a building phase. \nThen ask yourself: What am I ready to release to make space for what’s next? \nShare one insight or small practice that’s helping you stay grounded in your work or community using #PracticingConnection. Let’s normalize the in-between – together. \nLinks and resources from this episode: \n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]\n\n\n\n\n\nJESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, welcome to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica Beckendorf. This episode is a little different from what we originally planned\, my longtime co-host Coral Owen had hoped to join me today for a conversation welcoming our new co-host\, Erin Carlson Rivera. \nUnfortunately\, Coral was not able to be here when we’re recording\, but she did share a few reflections with us before stepping away from the podcast\, and I’d love to share some of her thoughts with you later in the episode. \nCoral has been an incredible partner and presence here at Practicing Connection and at OneOp\, and while we’ll miss her behind the mic\, we’re so excited for what’s ahead for her\, and grateful for everything she’s helped to build here. \nAnd now I’m thrilled to announce my guest today: our new co-host Erin Carlson Rivera. \nErin is a [00:01:00] self-described “chaos wrangler” and communication expert\, who spent the last decade with UW Madison’s division of Extension\, working across programs from community development to urban agriculture\, and probably everything in between. Because that’s what Extension does\, right? She’s passionate about systems that make work simpler\, kinder\, and more sustainable outside of work. \nErin loves to garden\, so do I\, and paint in gouache style\, and in her words\, “Eat cheese and read fantasy novels.” And I’m pretty sure that eating cheese is a prerequisite of living in Wisconsin\, because that’s also on my list. So Erin\, welcome. I am so happy that you’re here. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Thank you. It’s good to be here. It’s weird to be on this side of the microphone\, but I’m having a good time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, you’ve been co-producing for a little while now. So\, let’s actually start with what brought you here. \nYou’ve already been doing so much incredible work with OneOp\, and with UW Madison Division of Extension. So what drew [00:02:00] you to saying yes to co-hosting Practicing Connection? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Oh\, that’s a good question. I think it was a weirdly good fit for everything I was already doing. I was often given the fun task of onboarding new people to the office culture\, \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Which meant that I did a lot of coaching people and a lot of teaching them about communication and boundaries. And it turns out that’s a lot of what we talk about here. \nAnd one thing I love about Extension is how much the work is not possible unless you’re collaborating with other people. And this podcast is such a fun combination of sharing stories about collaboration\, and then getting into really nitty gritty specific details about\, “Here’s a thing to try\,” and it just is such\, you know\, like these are the conversations that I’m having with my coworkers [00:03:00] all of the time. \nI\, like low key\, can’t believe they’re not sick of me\, where I’ll be like\, “Hey\, have you tried this?” I try to only offer advice when advice is asked for and not be the person who’s always telling everybody\, “Try this\, try this\, try this.” \nBut here is this lovely platform where I can tell people\, “Try this\, try this\, try this\,” and it’s expected and wanted and not\, you know\, your micromanaging coworker telling you everything to do. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I would say ‘leader\,’ right? You’ve already brought up how you’ve had to onboard and coach\, and that’s a role that you’ve seen yourself doing\, and we talk a lot about leadership on this podcast\, so I would say you’re a leader. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Well\, thank you. Okay. The other less serious\, more fun reason I said yes is because since high school people have been telling me that I have a really soothing voice and they really love listening to me talk. [00:04:00] And I was like\, great\, here’s a way where I can share my soothing voice. You know\, it feels like a gift. \nI have very little to do with what my voice sounds like other than\, you know\, taking care of it and vocal lessons for singing. But you know\, my talking voice is just how I talk. So it feels like a fun way to kind of share this thing that has been really supportive to other people. \nIt feels a little weird to say that\, look\, I’ve lived in Wisconsin long enough that I’m very Midwestern\, and I feel like stating facts sometimes feels like bragging. \nBut\, yeah\, that’s my other reason. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, I’ve had similar feedback about my voice\, so hopefully we are not gonna put anyone to sleep. I’m kidding\, I’m kidding. We’re just\, it’s going to be a great compliment\, is what I’m trying to say. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: We’re going to have a good time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, you know\, before today’s recording\, Coral shared a few reflections about her time with Practicing Connection\, and I want to share some of those words with our listeners. \nSo Coral says\, “When I think back over my time with Practicing Connection\, the [00:05:00] moments that really capture what this podcast is about for me are the ones where we slowed things down enough. To name what people are actually living inside of\, not just what they’re doing on the surface. Episodes where we talked about ambiguity\, transition\, gratitude\, and hard seasons. \nThose stand out not because they offered big answers\, but because they made space for honesty. To me\, the heart of the podcast has always been about normalizing the in-between and reminding people they’re not doing it wrong\, just because things feel unclear. Those conversations captured the spirit of the show\, thoughtful\, human\, and grounded in real life rather than perfection.” \nI wish I could do an impression of Coral so that you could actually hear that in her voice. But I do want to add that I love what she said about the spirit of the show being thoughtful\, human\, and grounded in real life. I particularly love that because that was intentional from our very first planning session\, like years ago\, and it [00:06:00] remains an important pillar of how we do things around here. \nSo Erin\, when you hear that\, what does that bring up for you? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Wow. Yeah\, that is also one of the things that I love about this podcast. I’ve just\, you know\, I’ve worked at Extension a lot. I’ve seen a lot of different partnerships and a lot of different people. I’ve worked with a lot of different people and I’ve seen a lot of really cool things die\, because people wanted it to be perfect before it started\, or perfect before they could make changes\, or being so uncomfortable with ambiguity that everything just fell apart. \nAnd I love the hopefulness of this podcast\, and how we make space for people to be messy\, but still equip them and empower them. Hopefully give them tools that they can use to continue trying to make changes\, you know\, to be in process and not get stuck in the mess\, but be realistic [00:07:00] about\, “Hey\, this is messy and it doesn’t have to be messy forever. Here’s some things\, here’s some stepping stones in the river so you can get somewhere new.” \nAnd that has always been one of the things that I just love about this podcast is this space for being messy\, but still kind of – challenge is the wrong word; encouraging people to try new things\, to take risks\, to not let messiness prevent them from trying. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, and to do it together\, right. And I heard that\, in some of what you were saying there\, this idea of connection and collaboration are really\, really important to\, well\, not just the podcast\, right\, but really\, the podcast is the mechanism for the work that we’re trying to put out there in the world\, and the tools that we’re trying to help people with. \nAnd so\, you know\, people are not out there alone in the wilderness. We’re really trying to show them that\, not alone. And that\, we need to be a little messy together. We need to [00:08:00] coalesce together. We need to maybe ebb and flow between those two things\, to make some of those little baby steps. \nSo when you think of connection and collaboration in your own life or work\, what experiences or communities have shaped your perspective the most? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, this is such a good question. Okay. And I say that about every question\, and I’m so sorry\, but Jessica\, you do genuinely – you ask me questions and I go\, “Huh? Oh shoot. I have to think about that one.” \nOkay. So for me\, when I’m thinking about the collaboration\, one of the very first things that I think about is being in choir. Or being in a theater production. I am a theater kid\, former theater kid\, and former choir kid. And I spent a lot of time making art\, doing plays\, singing with groups of people in school who I normally would not hang out with. And maybe we didn’t even really like each other that much. [00:09:00] But we had this shared\, common goal of\, we wanted to create something that was an experience for our community. \nAnd I\, you know\, it sometimes feels silly to think so much about choir\, but I think it genuinely is such a helpful metaphor for how to do things in community. Because if you don’t all know what you’re doing\, if you don’t all know the communication conventions\, yeah\, if you don’t know ‘what is my role\,’ one person can’t be an entire choir\, and nobody should try to be an entire choir. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Doesn’t autotune help?! \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: You know\, stacking audio\, but the joy of a choir is having people working together and working harmoniously. And sometimes you sing in unison\, and sometimes you’re all singing different things. I love that. And I love how when you’re in a section and you’re all singing the [00:10:00] alto line\, I was an alto\, you’re all singing the alto line and you have just some note that you’re holding for 16 beats. \nAnd nobody can actually hold breath that long unless you’re a trained opera singer. Okay\, you can\, 16 isn’t that long\, but I think you get what I mean. There’s a really long note and then you stagger your breathing. \nAnd I just think about that every time I’m on a team. I want to say\, “Hey\, let’s all plan our vacations so they’re timed.” And I just think about singing in a choir where you don’t want everyone to take a break at the same time. You kind of want to intersperse it. That’s such a silly metaphor\, but I genuinely think that it’s been really impactful\, because those are some of the places where I first learned\, ‘here’s what it looks like to be a group of people all coming here for the same goal\, even if we are different.’ \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And even if we don’t all get along\, like you said before\, which I think is\, that’s such a great point to bring up. I was a show choir and marching band person as well. [00:11:00] And that was such a good point you brought up about\, you know\, I didn’t get along with every single person in my choir or band. \nI knew I wasn’t a strong singer\, also in alto\, by the way. I knew I wasn’t a strong singer. And what people thought of that\, you know\, I avoided those people and I stuck with the people who were\, but we still had a common goal we helped each other out\, right? I wasn’t a strong singer and so I didn’t do solos. \nOther people did that\, and that helped the whole choir out. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That point. \nSo I’d like to switch gears a little bit here\, Erin\, we’ve talked a little bit about how you’ve been part of Practicing Connection in different roles in different seasons. I mean\, really\, you’ve been behind the scenes with us since last June. Ao for\, you know\, a good seven months or so. Seven\, eight months. \nSo what do you see in your time here so far? What have you seen as the heartbeat of this podcast? I feel like that’s a [00:12:00] really hard question and I’m so sorry. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah. You really didn’t pick any softball questions for me. Okay\, yeah. I would say for me\, the heartbeat of this podcast is this idea that what we do matters. Both the interviews and the practicasts really highlight how much it’s possible to make changes. And when I’m really grumpy\, I really need someone to tell me that it doesn’t have to be like this forever. \nYou know\, I’ve had some like navigating processes of burnout and I kind of really wish I had listened to this podcast earlier\, because I think a lot of what really shines for me with this podcast is just\, ‘here are tools\, here are pictures of how it could be\, here are pathways to get to somewhere new.’ \nAnd I just love how hopeful that is\, and this idea that we can make small changes and it will impact our life. And even if things are hard\, we [00:13:00] can do it better. And maybe you’re not in a place where things are hard\, but you could still have it be more or better\, or different in a good way. And that you don’t have to change everything all at once to get there\, you just have to start the process and take little steps. This podcast is so good at really focusing in on the idea that you can just do small things and they can make a big impact\, I love that. \nSo for me that’s what\, what about you? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. So I guess I would say\, and this is something that we’ve kind of already touched on\, but for me\, the idea that none of us are out in the wilderness doing this alone\, even though it sometimes can really feel that way. \nAnd whatever your profession is\, there’s a lot of people out there that are doing what you’re doing in their communities\, and I guess for me\, the heartbeat of this podcast is kind of reminding people that they’re not alone. \nThat you can locally [00:14:00] and\, you know\, nationally\, internationally\, seek out a community of people who care about the big issues you’re trying to address in your community\, or who care about the big issues you’re trying to address for military families. You’re not alone in that. And that to me has been the deep down heartbeat of this podcast. \nAnd maybe I’ll share a little bit\, Coral reflected on this as well\, I love how we’re all coming at this from like different angles\, ‘cause I think it’s pretty well-rounded. And look\, we’re not trying to just\, you know\, advertise for the podcast here\, but it’s a pretty well-rounded podcast\, right? \nBut Coral’s reflection goes like this: \n“I think the heartbeat of the podcast is the permission it gives people to be where they are. There’s no expectation to be\, “Figured out.” It’s about noticing\, reflecting and staying connected to yourself and others while things are unfolding. That steadiness\, that willingness to sit with complexity feels really central to [00:15:00] what this show has been.” \nAnd this is now Jessica again\, my thoughts exactly. I think everything you said\, Erin\, spot on. Everything Coral said\, spot on. And of course\, everything I said I was\, I think is spot on. And really\, this idea of not being alone\, and of having this idea that what we do matters\, Coral’s idea of sitting with complexity\, I mean\, it’s all so relevant to this moment of transition\, right? \nWe have this big moment of transition for this podcast. And I guess I’m wondering\, Erin\, how do you stay grounded and connected when you’re moving through a big change? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, well\, aside from eating cheese\, like a good Wisconsinite – it’s required. Really. It’s literally required. No. \nI mean\, the cheese here is so good. Why would you not? Why would you not? I actually know people who don’t love cheese and I love them. You don’t have to like cheese to be my friend\, to be [00:16:00] clear. I would say that\, okay\, we’re talking about change. \nWhat I do most during really tumultuous times\, big transitions\, is I like to make art. I don’t always share it with other people. Sometimes I do\, but often I’ll do what I call ‘sketch noting’ as a reflection. And I’ll ask myself a big question\, something like\, “What am I going to miss?” Or\, “What do I want to bring with me?” Or\, “What am I happy to leave behind?” Sometimes that’s a really long list. \nOr it could be a more forward-looking something. It could be\,  “What am I excited about\, about this new thing?” And then I’ll just do little sketches\, or I’ll draw little comics. \nI find that that really helps me actually pause and think about what I’m doing\, because I have to figure out how to turn words into an image. And then it makes me figure out\, “What do I actually mean by this?” And [00:17:00] also when I make little comics and sketches of my reflections. I actually go back and look at my reflections later\, \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: So I feel like it helps me learn better\, because I’m slowing down\, I’m pausing\, I’m reflecting. \nSo really\, I think the true answer to your question is I do reflections\, like a true practicing connection podcaster. I pause and reflect about my life\, but I just do it with art\, because my attention span is too short just sit there and think in only words\, \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hmm. I really love that. The show has always encouraged that idea\, the taking a breath\, reflecting\, giving space for uncertainty and even more directly\, like we’ve actually had graphic recorders during some of our workshops. We’ve encouraged listeners to engage in creative destruction like blackout poetry\, and I’m looking forward to incorporating more of that kind of thing. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: As someone who one of her first jobs out [00:18:00] of college was in the creative economy\, economic development space\, I love to hear anytime someone wants to incorporate more art into their daily practice. You will hear me talk about this again! \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yes. Oh yeah. I mean\, we’ve also done like improv related stuff too\, because that’s where some of my background is. So I’m looking forward to it. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Yeah\, I think it’ll be fun. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: As we wrap up this conversation and look ahead to what’s next for Practicing Connection\, I’m feeling really\, really grateful. I’m feeling grateful for where we’ve been and where we’re going. \nSo\, Erin\, I’m wondering when you imagine the future of this podcast\, I kind of want to shift\, right\, so I’m grateful for where we’ve been and of course I’m grateful for where we’re going and\, clearly as a new co-host\, I’d love to hear your thoughts on where we’re going. \nSo\, when you imagine the future of this podcast\, what do you hope it makes possible for our listeners and for the OneOp community? \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: I want to talk about [00:19:00] how we can make collaboration joyful\, how we can make work joyful. I think sometimes work can be a slog\, and that feels terrible when you’re doing work you care about\, but it feels worse when you’re doing work you don’t care about. \nI think community is really important\, and I also think that learning how to be joyful together opens up possibilities that aren’t there if we’re only being practical. I think joy and practicality are super compatible\, and people look at me\, they make faces at me when I say that. \nI also think whimsy and practicality are surprisingly complimentary\, so I love that this has been a very hopeful\, reflective space that leaves space for messiness\, and I don’t want that to ever change. \nBut I do also want the tools that we give people and the stories that we give people to also inspire [00:20:00] joyfulness\, because I think when things are hard\, and any system with people in it is gonna have hard stuff: you know\, people are messy and that’s hard. \nAnd leaving space for people to be messy sometimes means that you have to deal with hard things you normally wouldn’t have to deal with if you could just kick ’em out for being messy. And so for me\, what I have found that sustains a community is when you can develop ways of being joyful together\, and develop an identity\, not just around what you’re fighting or what you dislike\, but also about what you love. That’s kind of what I want to bring to this podcast. \nI don’t know exactly what that’s going to look like yet\, but that’s my hope for the future of the podcast\, is that we can have hope and joy as part of our work life\, which feels not at all how work is pitched to you. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Part of me thinks “Erin\, that’s really unrealistic\,” but I think – \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That’s because you’ve been told that. Yeah. This is because like society has told us that. [00:21:00] Yeah. So beautifully said. \nThank you so much\, Erin. I am so excited to begin this next chapter with you. \nERIN CARLSON RIVERA: Thank you. I’m excited to be here. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And that’s it for this episode. I want to thank Coral Owen for sharing her reflections in this episode and for all she’s contributed to Practicing Connection over the years. I’m deeply grateful to have worked alongside her and to carry forward what we built together. \nI also want to thank my co-producer and now co-host as well\, Erin Carlson Rivera\, our announcer\, Kaylyn Global Mathis\, Maggie Lucas and Joyce Vaughn for their help with marketing and Nathan Grim who composed and performed all the music here on the podcast. \nThank you so much for listening. Until next time\, keep practicing. \n[00:22:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3. \n\n\n\n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/a-new-chapter-for-practicing-connection/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260122T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260122T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260129T110018Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260129T222903Z
UID:10001723-1769061600-1769101200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Meaningful Growth: How to Make the Most Out of Every Learning Opportunity
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODU0Njk0MCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg1NDY5NDAtbWVhbmluZ2Z1bC1ncm93dGgtaG93LXRvLW1ha2UtdGhlLW1vc3Qtb3V0LW9mLWV2ZXJ5LWxlYXJuaW5nLW9wcG9ydHVuaXR5LmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTg1NDY5NDAlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 4) \nAre you tired of leaving conferences or trainings feeling overloaded – like you missed what mattered most?  \nThis was one of our most popular episodes of 2025\, and it’s as relevant as ever as we dig into the new year\, with more conferences and events on the horizon. \nCoral and Jessica reveal a simple\, powerful practice that can turn every professional development opportunity into meaningful\, actionable growth. Get ready to take charge of your learning with intention! \nJessica shares a practical reflection exercise designed to help you filter the noise\, focus on what matters to you\, and connect your learning to your real-world goals. \nWhether you’re attending a conference\, a webinar\, or any PD event\, discover how a two-minute pause can make your growth more personalized\, empowering\, and connected. \nTune in for step-by-step guidance\, insightful questions\, and actionable strategies to transform the way you learn. \nLinks and resources from this episode: \n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]\n\n\n\n\n\nCORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hello. Thank you for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral\, my co-host\, Jessica is here today as well\, and we’re going to be talking about setting learning intentions. Jessica is going to be sharing today’s practice with us. Jessica\, how are you? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hey Coral. I’m pretty good. I’m actually really looking forward to this topic series\, because I’ve had a few professional development opportunities lately\, and I realize how long it’s been now since that’s happened. To be honest\, going to these professional development opportunities\, it all felt so hectic that I’ve really appreciated what I’m learning. \nAs we’ve been putting these episodes together\, the really nice thing is that even though it’s been a while since the last conference I attended\, I’d actually forgotten how refreshing and inspiring and motivating it can be to hear how others are approaching their work\, to talk with them in the hallways and to ask them questions about how they approach [00:01:00] their projects. \nIt’s really been nice and it came at\, I think\, the perfect time for me. \nCORAL OWEN: Those can be such great touch points. I agree. I remember actually we met at a conference\, I think it was in San Antonio\, a very long time ago. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, 2016. \nCORAL OWEN: I think so. I had first begun with OneOp\, and you weren’t even quite on the project yet. Look at us now. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I know\, I know! \nCORAL OWEN: But yeah\, just so many wonderful\, just kind of a-ha light bulb moments\, and seeing people doing similar things\, maybe with a slightly different approach or angle. And it’s just like a great\, you know\, idea incubator and some fresh inputs to kind of reenergize your work. So I’m so glad that you’ve had that opportunity recently. Good deal. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. And that was a really good conference too\, I remember. \nCORAL OWEN: For sure. Oh man. And we would always love to hear what’s inspiring y’all\, our listeners. So do drop us a line if you’d love to reach out. You can reach us at Practicing [00:02:00] connection@oneop.org. We do see and respond to every message\, and we can’t wait to hear from you. \n– break – \nAlrighty. Let’s learn a little bit more about setting learning intentions. Jessica\, can you share a bit more about the practice you’re going to be discussing today and why you selected it? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. You know\, as a team we’ve been kind of going round and round thinking about how we can best support all the participants who will be attending our annual academy this year. And our co-producer\, Erin\, she’s\, you know\, new to the team\, within the first couple of minutes of a brainstorming session she said\, “Well\, what if we produce episodes about making the most of professional development opportunities?” I don’t even think we came up with other ideas because it just felt so perfect. The idea for this series came out of the recognition that participating in professional development can often [00:03:00] feel really overwhelming. Kind of like drinking from a fire hose. \nLike I just said before\, right\, it’s been a little bit hectic and overwhelming being at these opportunities. So with so much information coming at you\, it’s really easy to walk away feeling like you may have missed what mattered the most. That’s why we’re starting with exploring the practice of setting a personal learning intention. \nAnd that’s what this practice is all about. Even a simple two minute reflection\, asking yourself what you most want to take away can really transform the experience from just kind of an information overload into maybe some meaningful growth\, or some meaningful learnings and takeaways. \nAnd I would say that we see this idea of a learning intention\, and I’m saying we\, because I think\, you know\, this has been a very co-produced episode – We see this helping in several ways. First of all\, setting a learning intention can help you design a [00:04:00] personalized experience for the learning\, right? \nThe presenters have really great learning objectives\, but if you’re setting your own learning intention\, it can ensure that you get what you wanted to get out of it\, so that the content is really meaningful and relevant to you. And then part of the reason for that is that it helps you focus. \nIt helps to kind of filter the flood of content so that you can recognize and retain what’s most valuable to you\, because you’ve identified what’s most valuable to you. And I’d say the other thing that we see this\, potentially helping with is kind of putting you in the driver’s seat of what you want. So\, I mean\, because you’re in the driver’s seat\, you’ve been empowered to listen for the content that you really want to listen for. You have developed that personalized experience. \nYou’re able then to kind of possibly increase your engagement and the likelihood of applying what you’ll learn\, because of this empowerment and the focus you’ve been able to put on [00:05:00] the topics that are meaningful to you. And then finally\, it really encourages connection\, right? If you set an intention about what you wanna get out of this\, it encourages you to notice the opportunities to connect with your peers and to tailor the experience to collaborative growth. \nAnd we’ll talk more about this in an upcoming episode. We’ll dive into this idea of connection\, and making that part of your plan for making the most out of your professional development. \nCORAL OWEN: I absolutely love the intention for this episode. So can we go ahead and just dive right in? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. So like I mentioned a little bit ago\, even doing a two minute reflection can really help. So I’m going to start with an approximate two minute reflection. And then I’m going to share some follow up questions that can help if you’re stuck or unsure about what you learned. So for this two minute [00:06:00] reflection\, you’re going to start with just taking a moment\, get out a piece of paper if you want to write it. \nYou can also just think about this\, that’s fine. Get out a piece of paper\, a pen perhaps. If you want to\, you can close your eyes\, take a couple of breaths\, and just think\, “What do I want to get out of this? How does this connect to my current work or goals? What has made learning hard for me in the past and how can I support myself this time?” \nIf you identify a couple of things that you need in order to support yourself\, you may want to set those things up for yourself\, right? So write down what you need\, and kind of pursue those things that will help support your learning. So let me give you an example. Maybe because it’s a webinar\, for example\, it’s easy to be distracted by email or other notifications coming in. \nSo [00:07:00] maybe you need to just turn off all notifications\, close your email. Or maybe you need to identify if there’s anyone else you know that’s attending\, where you could maybe organize a watch party\, a virtual watch party\, or a discussion group so that you’ve kind of committed to the learning. So\, whatever it is you need\, try to arrange for that so that it will support you. \nAnd then lastly\, try to capture this. I know I said you don’t have to write it down\, and you certainly don’t\, but you may want to capture it and write it down. So\, for example\, my intention is to learn practical strategies for leading meetings so I can help my department communicate more effectively. \nRefer to this at least once during the event and maybe revisit it at the end to reflect on your progress. So if you’re stuck\, we do have actually a short list of questions that you can use to help [00:08:00] you identify what might be most important to you. I’ll admit there are times when I can’t think of an intention because I’m feeling rushed. \nI maybe just got back to 15 emails\, and now the webinar’s about to start\, and I just didn’t have any time to do it. And so\, the set of questions that we have can help support\, you could do either before the session or after. And we’re gonna have them available as a download\, but I wanna share a little snippet with you. \nSo these questions help you do things like uncovering your personal motivation for being involved\, in this particular webinar or training\, connect your learning to real world context. So that’s kind of about how does it support the work that you’re doing already\, to explore growth and change. So what might you do differently in your role? And then to focus on connection and collaboration. Who can you connect with about this? [00:09:00]\nSo\, we have a set of\, I think it’s about a dozen or so questions that can kind of help you think through that and support your professional development. \nCORAL OWEN: This was so wonderful\, Jessica. Thank you so much for guiding us through these questions and reflection points today. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. You know\, I know that we do have so many great intentions when we sign up for webinars and conferences. I can’t tell you how many webinars I’ve signed up for and not been able to attend\, right? And I am always looking for ways that I can maybe just slow down my brain just a little bit. And it’s one of the reasons why I’ve really enjoyed diving into this topic\, because I think it’s something that I could work on quite a bit myself. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. Just to be able to filter some of the inputs that we’re receiving and give it greater context into how it can apply\, I think is just always such a wonderful skillset to have at hand. \nWell\, that is it for today’s episode. Thank you all so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this [00:10:00] episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or colleague who may find it of interest. \nWe’ll be back next week with a new episode\, and until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Off and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3. \n\n\n\n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/meaningful-growth/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260115T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260115T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260115T110053Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260409T154642Z
UID:10001722-1768456800-1768496400@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Do You Ever Struggle to Stick to Your Goals?
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODUwMzE0MyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg1MDMxNDMtZG8teW91LWV2ZXItc3RydWdnbGUtdG8tc3RpY2stdG8teW91ci1nb2Fscy5qcyUzRmNvbnRhaW5lcl9pZCUzRGJ1enpzcHJvdXQtcGxheWVyLTE4NTAzMTQzJTI2cGxheWVyJTNEc21hbGwlMjIlMjB0eXBlJTNEJTIydGV4dCUyRmphdmFzY3JpcHQlMjIlMjBjaGFyc2V0JTNEJTIydXRmLTglMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 3) \nDo you ever struggle to stick to your goals? Discover the WOOP method\, a powerful tool that uses obstacles as stepping stones to success. \nIn this replay episode\, one of our most popular from 2025\, discover WOOP: a science-backed goal-setting practice that helps you overcome obstacles and achieve your goals. \nLearn how to apply this simple yet powerful tool to transform your habits and improve your well-being. \nPractical links from this episode: \n\nhttps://woopmylife.org/\nhttps://woopmylife.org/en/practice \n\nWe’d love to hear what’s inspiring you! Share your thoughts using the “Send us a text message” feature or email us at practicingconnection@oneop.org. \n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]\n\n\n\n\n\n\nJESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hello. Thanks so much for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica\, and I’m flying solo today for the first time ever! I will be rejoined by my co-hosts soon\, but today it’s just me. And I’ll be sharing a practice for goal setting that I have used successfully in the past. It’s called WOOP. \nThat’s WOOP\, and it stands for Wish\, Outcome\, Obstacle\, Plan. This practice has been instrumental in helping me overcome obstacles and change habits. I come back to it whenever I need to rethink my thinking about an issue. Let me give you an example. I used to forget to pack my lunch. Almost every day\, I would rush out the door without a lunch\, and very likely without having eaten breakfast [00:01:00] as well\, but that’s another issue for another practice on another day! \nThe problem was that this didn’t align with my financial goals. I wanted to save money\, not spend it every day. And the other problem was that this didn’t align with my health goals either. I used it as an excuse to eat fast food or to eat poorly in general\,right? \nThat food tastes good\, right? I really needed to make a change though. So one day I was listening to a podcast episode that highlighted this practice. I remember thinking that the funny name would probably help me remember it\, and when I mess up\, I could just say\, “Whoops\,” and try again. I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I chuckled to myself about that very unfunny thought. \nI don’t recall who was being interviewed on the podcast\, this was quite a while ago. But what I learned was that this tool was [00:02:00] backed by research\, and that it really helped people with things like changing their behavior and realizing their goals\, becoming more physically active\, adopting a healthier lifestyle and diet. Taking better care of their own wellbeing. \nExhibiting more pro-social behavior\, and improving their performance. It sounded really impressive\, so I went to their website to learn more. The website is https://woopmylife.org/\, and I’ll make sure to have a link for you in the show notes because they’ve got some really great resources: videos\, and even an entire kit for you to use to implement this tool in your work and life. \nSo WOOP is based in the science of human motivation. It uses the very obstacles that get in our way as the catalyst for achieving our goals. It does that by helping us to imagine what those inner obstacles are. So these are the things that may be [00:03:00] the thoughts and the behaviors that we currently have\, that we can change\, that are internal to ourselves. \nSo these are not external obstacles. These are all internal obstacles. So it helps us imagine those\, and then create a plan for when those obstacles are happening. What can we do to move through that or to get around it and achieve our goals anyway? \nSo let’s learn more by getting into the practice and sharing an example. \n– break – \nAgain\, WOOP stands for Wish\, Outcome\, Obstacle and Plan\, and you can practice this in a few ways. I like to use WOOP in its shortest version. So on their website they have a kit and there’s a worksheet called “WOOP In One Glance” in that kit. That’s how I started [00:04:00] using this tool\, mostly because I’ve primarily used this tool to forge new habits\, versus making longer term goals. \nBut it can be used both ways and you can find out more at their website@woopmylife.org. So let’s get started. Start with your wish. In three to six words\, choose your wish. Choose something that is challenging\, but feasible. I’ve heard things like\, “I want to run a marathon\,” as being a wish. But my first time practicing whoop\, I said\, “I wanted to stop eating fast food for lunch.” \nI thought that would be challenging\, but also feasible. So now the next step is\, in three to six words\, again\, identify what would be the best outcome of fulfilling your wish. My answer was that\, “I would feel healthier and more energized\,” right? \nSo the next step we’ll move on to is\, what’s the obstacle? [00:05:00] Identify your main inner obstacle that holds you back from fulfilling your wish. So again\, you’re trying to do this in three to six words\, and in my case\, it was forgetting to pack my lunch or forgetting to take my lunch with me before I left. That’s more than six words\, but the word limit is really a guide to help keep you focused. \nAnd then finally\, in again\, three to six words\, note what action you can take to overcome your obstacle. So in this example\, I thought it would be a better idea to drive past the fast food restaurants and instead pull into the grocery store parking lot to make up a salad or get some other healthier foods. \nThen you’ll wanna put it all together like this: So\, you’re gonna kind of create a little bit of an “If –  then” statement. So “if”: state your obstacle\, “then I will”: state your action or thought to overcome your [00:06:00] obstacle. So “if\,” obstacle\, “then I will\,” action. Here’s what it sounds like with my example. “If I forget my lunch\, then I will go to the grocery store.” \nThat’s it. I am telling you\, this practice has been such a helpful tool in my toolbox to help me change behaviors and improve my resilience and relationship with myself. \nThat’s it for this episode. Thanks so much for joining us\, or for joining me today! If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend. \nDo you have a favorite practice you’d like to share with us? Click\, “Send us a text message” at the top of the description of this episode. When you click the link\, your text messaging app will open and you’ll see a seven digit number with the words “do not remove.” Type your message after that and click send. \nWe’ll share your feedback on a future episode. If you’re listening on a computer\, you can email us at practicing connection@oneop.org instead. We’ll be back next [00:07:00] week with a brand new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, U. S. Department of Agriculture\, and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, U. S. Department of Defense\, under award number 2023-48770-41333. \n\n\n\n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/do-you-ever-struggle-to-stick-to-your-goals/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
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DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260108T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260108T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260108T110037Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260112T200205Z
UID:10001717-1767852000-1767891600@oneop.org
SUMMARY:2026 Reset: Creating Space\, Choosing Direction
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODQ0Njg3NiUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg0NDY4NzYtMjAyNi1yZXNldC1jcmVhdGluZy1zcGFjZS1jaG9vc2luZy1kaXJlY3Rpb24uanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODQ0Njg3NiUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 2) \nBefore you set new goals for 2026\, take a pause.  \nThis episode guides you through a gentle two‑part reset – honoring what you’re completing and choosing one honest intention for how you want to move through the year\, without pressure or over‑planning. \nThe new year often comes with pressure to have a clear plan\, big goals\, and a “new you.” In this episode of Practicing Connection\, Jessica and Coral offer a different kind of reset: a simple\, integrated practice in two parts – “Completion Creates Space” and “Intention Gives Direction.” \nYou’ll be guided to notice how you’re arriving\, name what you’re closing or completing\, release expectations that no longer fit\, and then choose a single word to orient how you want to be in this next season. \nThis reflection is less about productivity and more about alignment\, making room for what matters without rushing who you’re becoming. \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\nSubscribe to our newsletter: https://oneop.aweb.page/practicing-connection-newsletter\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica\, my co-host. Coral is here as well. Coral\, how are you? \nCORAL OWEN: Hey Jessica\, I’m doing really well\, thanks. I am a little bit in that ‘early new year’ head space where there’s a mix of reflection and possibility\, and also just a little bit of pressure of having to figure things out. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I get that\, that pressure can really sneak in fast. There’s so much talk at the beginning of every year really about like resets\, goals\, fresh starts\, ‘new year\, new you\,’ you know\, \nCORAL OWEN: That was literally the next line I was going to lead with. Yeah. New year\, new me\, and not to completely throw all that out\, but just to counter that sort of like ‘revolutionizing’ and completely switching everything out. \nI really just want to slow the conversation down a bit more today. Honestly\, a meaningful reset is not just about deciding what’s next\, it’s also about acknowledging [00:01:00] what we’re coming out of\, and sort of that more gentle\, hence sustainable\, approach to a fresh start\, while also acknowledging what we’re leaving\, what we’re transitioning from. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I love anytime you can sneak a gentle way of doing things in. I love it. \nSo today we’re focusing on a reset that helps create clarity\, alignment\, and purpose\, while also letting go of what’s no longer serving us. And you’re going to be guiding us through this\, as a single practice with two parts. \nCan you share a little bit about that? \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, absolutely. And so we already talked a little bit about this whole\, you know\, ‘we’re coming out of and then transitioning into\,’ and so hence the framing of today’s reflection and practice as an integrated practice where there is a pairing of two parts that are indeed meant to work together. \nSo the whole idea here is simple. It’s that completion is creating the space that we need to invite intention\, which gives us direction. And [00:02:00] if we skip that completion and just jump feet first or head first\, depending on how adventurous you are in the new year\, if we just jump straight in with the intention of moving forward and adding\, a lot of times we just carry a little bit of old weight\, maybe even some baggage into a new chapter or a new season. \nAnd so this practice that invites you to pause\, close the chapter intentionally\, it doesn’t mean you have to have everything wrapped up and finalized. We’ll get into that here in just a second. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: You don’t have to drop everything either. \nCORAL OWEN: No\, no. It’s not like\, ‘Okay\, 2025\, you know\, December 31st\, all that’s finished and it’s a clean slate.’ \nBut it’s\, yeah\, just kind of buttoning up some loose ends\, acknowledging\, and then we choose a direction that feels aligned without this pressure or over-planning. So\, really excited to dig into this because this honestly is one of my favorite times of year\, due to this sort of fresh feel\, but still carrying a version of ourselves\, into that fresh start. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that [00:03:00] feels like a really grounded approach to a reset. And so\, I guess let’s just get right into the practice. Yeah\, take it away\, Coral! \nCORAL OWEN: Awesome. So we’ll kick things off\, with the beginning. And so if you’re able\, this is a great moment to slow down or\, you know\, if you’re sort of in a more hectic space right now while you’re listening to it\, maybe just pause right here and come back to us when you have a little bit more calm and centeredness or quiet\, because this is a reflective piece that we are starting with. \nSo we would invite you to grab a notebook. Just take a few quiet minutes if you can find those in your day\, and you can also move through this entire bit once or return to it into segments\, sometimes that can be helpful. So this is not about judgment or productivity\, it’s just about alignment and awareness – is the energy I would invite you to bring into this. \nSo for the first part of the first piece\, it’s this whole idea again of completion. Or the wrapping up\, the resolution is creating space. [00:04:00] And this is true in that endings deserve attention as well\, because it gives us that threshold over which to step into a new space. \nSo we’re going to set the scene\, we already talked about that. We’re going to take a breath\, remind ourselves that this is about noticing\, not about evaluating\, and just check in with yourself\, see how you feel. How am I feeling as I begin this reflection? “Am I good?” is a question to ask yourself. And again\, there is no right answer here. It’s just really important to acknowledge the energy that you’re bringing into this reflective practice. \nSo first\, step two of part one\, we’re going to reflect on the year or season you’re moving out of. Doesn’t have to be this huge deep dive or anything wild. Just a few things to consider and just\, again\, put that bow on the previous year of 2025. \nSome things to think about. What am I completing or closing? What challenges did I move [00:05:00] through? What efforts or growth deserve acknowledgement? And they don’t have to be huge. They might be very small bite-size\, but very meaningful nonetheless. And perhaps\, what did I learn about myself? \nYou may have other questions that are worth consideration\, but those are just a few to begin with\, and again\, completion does not require perfect outcomes. It simply asks you what to name\, what was real to you in this previous year. \nFrom there\, we are going to release what is no longer serving us. So you may ask yourself what expectations\, roles\, or commitments am I ready to set down? Another question you may follow that up with is\, what am I holding onto out of habit\, guilt\, momentum\, that is not out of alignment. \nAnd you can even tell yourself sometimes these expectations\, or just bits of ourselves that can get real sticky\, in sort of a\, you know\, not intentional way\, you can even tell yourself\, “I’m allowed to let this go.” That permission of just setting something down [00:06:00] that is perhaps holding you back or holding you down\, this release may actually be a little bit emotional\, or a lot emotional. \nThat’s okay. But this is what is going to give you clarity and space to move into part two. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That\, Coral\, is often one of my favorite parts of an end of year reflection. As you know\, I do end of year reflections all the time\, and I really love to just think through\, well\, for one thing\, I always feel really accomplished going through all the things that I’m proud of and what I learned about myself. \nI always feel really accomplished doing that\, but it really does feel good to kind of close that chapter and start thinking fresh\, start thinking for a new direction. So let’s get into part two now. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So now that we’ve created some space\, we’ve moved into intention\, and we’re moving into this intentionality\, not as a list of goals\, just to\, you know\, tick the box on\, but as an orientation of where we’re headed to make sure that we’re moving in a purposeful [00:07:00] direction. \nSo for the next bit\, you could call this step four\, we are going to choose one word. So ask yourself what word captures how I want to move through this next chapter or next year. \nAlso\, this is something that I do reflect on myself. Sometimes the year feels very big. Maybe you just focus on the first quarter or first six months of the year. Because sometimes it’s hard to know what is life going to look like a year from now? \nSo if 12 months feels like a big chunk of time\, shrink it down. That’s okay\, you don’t have to do an assessment of what you want to accomplish\, but more so how do you want to be? And this being can be encapsulated in that one word that feels honest and supportive. \nJess\, do you have a\, actually just as a sidebar\, do you have a word that you’re considering for 2026? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I do. I’m still kind of formulating it\, but right now the word that comes to mind for [00:08:00] me is\, ‘ease.’ \nCORAL OWEN: I like that a lot. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Building in more ease. I mean\, how I want to be is ‘ease’. That doesn’t make sense grammatically\, but that’s the word that’s coming to mind for me. So\, I’m going to continue kind of iterating on that. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that. One of my mantras a year prior was Let it Be Easy\, and this year it’s ‘expand.’ \nSo\, awesome. Thanks for sharing that\, Jess. \nSo from there\, step five is\, define it for yourself. So a few things to consider once you’ve selected your word – and also you can change your word as you move through the year\, we’ve actually got a mid-year check-in episode\, I think it was July 31st of 2025\, if you want to reevaluate\, you can go back to that one. \nBut for now\, as we’re considering our word of 2026 to kick the year off\, you can ask yourself\, what does this word mean to me right now? Additionally\, how would I recognize it’s showing up in everyday life? \nSo this is not [00:09:00] necessarily like your slogan\, but more as a lens by which you can use to just anchor yourself when you’re making decisions. You know\, is this decision\, direction\, action\, activity in alignment with – insert your word. It can give you clarity pretty quickly. \nSo from there\, to wrap things up\, step six is carry it forward gently with grace. So there is nothing here to force\, and again\, when decisions come up\, you can ask\, what would it look like to move in this direction today? \nThis is simply that intention doing its work quietly and consistently. No big\, heroic movements. It’s just that incremental shift in the direction that is going to lead you to where you’d like to be. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love how this keeps intention from turning into pressure and putting pressure on yourself. It feels like something that you can return to again and again\, especially if you’re doing it gently\, and\, in [00:10:00] my case\, with ease. \nCORAL OWEN: I see what you did there. Exactly. Yeah. This is not meant to be a one time\, you know\, go through it\, reflect\, and then stick it on the shelf. This is something that can anchor your year. I actually\, with the word\, have written that some people will do\, like\, stamp jewelry\, or I tend to write it someplace on my big grass calendar that’s in my office. \nYou know\, write it at the bottom of that calendar\, just someplace that you can see it consistently. A sticky note on your desk or your laptop\, so that you can have that north star if you will. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Nobody can see me\, but every year I get mine tattooed on my face\, and then I just like get a line crossed through it\, and then I get the next one. \nCORAL OWEN: Rinse\, repeat\, \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Right\, right. And you said\, you know\, don’t do this and then put it on the shelf. I would say\, do this and put it on the refrigerator\, [00:11:00] so that you can see it every time. \nSo that you’ve got something like you said\, some sort of reminder somewhere that you look at regularly. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. That’s a great suggestion. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I look at my refrigerator regularly. I don’t know about you\, but – \nCORAL OWEN: A thousand percent. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So as we wrap up\, maybe take a moment to notice what feels lighter or what feels clearer. Even just a little bit\, just a little lighter\, a little \nclearer. \nCORAL OWEN: Yep. And just remember to bring everything home: completion\, create space\, and intention that gives you direction. You don’t have to rush either part. We’ve actually talked about\, just in recent episodes\, that in between space of ‘becoming.’ \nThis is a really key thing to keep in mind here\, right? That sometimes there is a wrap up phase that we do carry into the new year. It’s not like a light switch. So don’t rush the completion\, but acknowledge things that may be coming to a close. And then go ahead and just start those sort of bite-sized atomic [00:12:00] habits (that’s a great reread at the end of the year too)\, that are going to begin edging you in the direction you want to be in. \nAgain\, you’re not completely becoming someone new. It’s about moving forward\, maybe shedding a bit of your old skin\, and growing towards wherever it is you want to be with more alignment and less weight. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Okay. Awesome. Thanks so much\, Coral. That’s it for this episode. Thanks for joining us. \nIf this conversation resonated\, click the share button in your podcast app. Share it with a friend or a colleague. We’ll be back next week with a new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \n[00:13:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/2026-reset-creating-space-choosing-direction/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20260101T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20260101T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20260101T110009Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260112T193941Z
UID:10001716-1767247200-1767286800@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Beyond Sleep: Four Kinds of Rest We All Need
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODQwNzY5MiUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTg0MDc2OTItYmV5b25kLXNsZWVwLWZvdXIta2luZHMtb2YtcmVzdC13ZS1hbGwtbmVlZC5qcyUzRmNvbnRhaW5lcl9pZCUzRGJ1enpzcHJvdXQtcGxheWVyLTE4NDA3NjkyJTI2cGxheWVyJTNEc21hbGwlMjIlMjB0eXBlJTNEJTIydGV4dCUyRmphdmFzY3JpcHQlMjIlMjBjaGFyc2V0JTNEJTIydXRmLTglMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 7\, Episode 1) \nIf you’re exhausted but time off hasn’t really helped\, the problem might not be how much you rest\, but what kind of rest you’re getting.  \nThis episode explores four different kinds of rest – physical\, mental\, emotional\, and creative – and offers simple ways to notice what you actually need right now. \n“Get more rest” is common advice\, but it can feel discouraging when sleep or a day off doesn’t make a dent in your exhaustion. \nIn this episode of Practicing Connection\, Coral and Jessica unpack four different kinds of rest: physical rest for your body\, mental rest from constant thinking and decision‑making\, emotional rest from hosting and holding others’ feelings\, and creative rest that gives you space to play and explore without being productive. \nThrough real‑life examples and practical ideas\, they invite you to notice which type of rest you might be craving and experiment with small\, accessible ways to restore yourself in this season. \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\nSubscribe to our newsletter: https://oneop.aweb.page/practicing-connection-newsletter\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”][00:00:00]\nCORAL OWEN: Hey there. Thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral\, my co-host\, Jessica is here as well\, and today we are going to be talking about getting the rest you actually need. Jessica\, how are you today? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I’m doing pretty good. As you know\, we’re recording this toward the end of the year. I found myself really needing to focus on rest\, so\, I’m looking forward to talking about this topic today. I think I’ve kind of self-inflicted an impossible to-do list during the holiday season this year. \nAnd it’s all stuff that I enjoy doing\, but I cram it into the same week that I should be also resting and enjoying myself and time with my family. So\, I mean\, have you ever come back to work after a vacation and felt like you needed a vacation from your vacation? \nCORAL OWEN: No\, never. Yeah\, Jess. All the time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Oh\, okay! I was like\, “I need to learn from you!” \nCORAL OWEN: All the time! \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: But okay\, so this also afflicts you. \nCORAL OWEN: Oh yeah. No\, there [00:01:00] are so many times\, I mean\, even if it’s just not even like a big\, chunky break\, like\, the holiday season\, even if it’s just sometimes like a long weekend or we’ve taken a short trip somewhere. Or even if it’s just like a staycation at home\, I’m like\, “Oh\, hmm\, why am I so exhausted? \nSo\, yeah\, sometimes it’s just a wonder where that battery drain comes from. But no\, that is so incredibly relatable. I think a lot of people probably feel the same way. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And it’s really discouraging sometimes\, like even more so if\, quote\, “get more rest” is the only advice or support that people offer when you share about how you’re doing. \nSo like that just kind of adds to that frustration when you’re sharing about\, you know\, “Hey\, I’ve got a lot on my plate.” \n“Oh\, well just say ‘no’ to more things.” Or\, “Well\, you should get some more rest. Oh\, you should rest.” \nSo before I learned about different ways to rest\, I would get resentful anytime someone told me to rest. So why should I rest if it doesn’t [00:02:00] help? Because I’m taking time off right now and I’m feeling it with things I enjoy\, but also it’s like a long list of things. \nSo I know that I could say no to some of those things\, but you know\, it could also be that you don’t need more rest\, you just need a different kind of rest\, and that’s why I’m excited to talk about this today. \nCORAL OWEN: That’s really interesting. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever thought about the different types of rest\, but as I think\, I’m just thinking through my mental catalog of instances. Like in memories in the past. It’s like\, yeah\, I’ve definitely had\, you know\, sort of that classical recipe. \nWe were like\, “Get some rest.” And I’m like\, “Oh yeah\, I’ll catch up on some sleep or go sit on the beach for a little extra time.” But I think there are different seasons of life or different spaces where we’re in different roles and we can’t necessarily just unplug. \nThere’s a lot more activity or different types of ways we’re moving through life\, so I am actually very excited to learn more about what you’re going to be walking us through today.[00:03:00]\nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, you know\, I think often when we talk about rest\, we think about sleeping more\, or sitting and doing nothing. Maybe reading\, this is a kind of rest. \nBut maybe the part of you that needs rest isn’t your body. Maybe you need to rest your brain or you need to take a break from being productive\, which is the loop I’m in right now\, right? \nSo I’m doing things I enjoy\, but I have this need to be productive. It isn’t always intuitive to figure out what kind of rest you need. \nSo I’m going to be walking through four different kinds of rest for each type. We’re going to have a short explanation of what it is\, and a few ideas for how to try out that type of rest. \nSo we’re kind of doing this a little different. Normally\, we like to talk a little bit\, and then we have a specific practice\, but we’re actually going to go through a type of rest and then we’re going to talk about how you can try that out\, and then we’ll go into the next type. \nCORAL OWEN: That sounds great\, and again\, I’m very\, very much looking forward to this because it’s such a [00:04:00] salient and I think very ubiquitous topic to explore this time of year. \nIs there anything\, Jessica\, that we should be listening for in particular as you’re walking us through these practices today or types of things you’re unpacking? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that’s a really good question. So I would say that as you listen\, I would encourage you to look for what sounds exciting or interesting that can often be a sign that that’s something you’re craving right now. \nCORAL OWEN: That sounds good. I’m gonna file that away. Do you want to kick things off? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. So\, the first kind of rest is one that most people are going to be familiar with\, and that’s physical rest. That’s often the first type of rest we think of when someone says we should get more rest. \nSo this kind of rest can look lots of different ways\, but it typically deals with sleep\, stillness\, or letting your body physically recover. \nThe goal is to give your body time to heal or restore its energy. So\, signs you might need physical [00:05:00] rest are things like trouble staying awake\, a general fatigue\, consistent headaches\, tight muscles\, or being sore or achy. Some ways to get physical rest are to\, the obvious\, take a nap or let yourself sleep in or sleep a little bit longer. \nWear comfortable clothes and lounge. That’s a great way to get this kind of rest\, clearly from the energy behind that. That’s one of my favorite ways – is just to throw on some uncomfortable clothes and lounge. Or you could take a slow walk or do gentle stretches to help relax your body. \nAnd drinking water without doing other tasks at the same time is another way to get this kind of rest. And one thing that people don’t always think about when it comes to physical rest is giving yourself a break from overstimulating things like screens\, bright lights\, loud sounds and dramatic temperatures. \nConsider dimming your lights\, putting [00:06:00] down your screens for 10 to 20 minutes and giving your body a break from stimulation. The one exception that I have to this is sometimes\, I really enjoy those sound baths\, and I’ll go to YouTube when I’m going to take a little break like this. \nI’ll go to YouTube first\, which we’re trying to tell you\, put down your screens\, but I’ll go to YouTube and I’ll find one of these sound bath videos. I’ll turn that on\, and often those sound baths will\, like\, they’ll dim their own screen and they’ll go dark after a little. I don’t watch it. I just listen\, you know\, I close my eyes and listen. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, those are a lot of great suggestions. and I think too\, one of the things that comes to mind is sometimes I have a tendency to stay up maybe a little longer than I should. So also back\, you know\, walking that time to bed backwards rather than like\, okay\, say you can’t sleep in\, can you go to bed a little earlier too? \nBut those are all wonderful suggestions. What is the second type of rest that you’re going to take us through? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. This might be the second most thought of type I [00:07:00] would say: mental rest. You know\, this is taking a break from thinking – tasks like problem solving or meetings or answering emails\, answering text messages quickly\, switching between contexts\, or constantly keeping track of time\, right. \nTaking a break from those kinds of things. The main goals of this kind of rest are mental quiet\, which sounds lovely when I say that. Just those two words together. Mental. Quiet. \nAnd space to stop paying attention or remembering. And I would even say permission to stop paying attention or having to remember something. \nSome signs that you might need mental rest are maybe you’re having a hard time making decisions. You’re having a hard time understanding what people are saying when they’re saying it. You’re struggling to initiate tasks\, or you keep forgetting something important. \nAnd this is a common type of rest. Mental rest is a common type of rest needed by parents\, managers and people who work with [00:08:00] ideas or relationships. But obviously we all need a little bit of mental rest sometimes\, right? \nAnd a few ways to get this type of rest: I schedule a chunk of time where you can just default your decisions\, reread or rewatch something familiar and enjoyable\, or you could track time by how the sun changes\, instead of maybe your phone\, or by listening to a playlist or an album instead of setting a timer. So there’s just a few examples. \nThere’s probably a lot of other ideas for taking mental rest as well. It’s just kind of trying to give you a taste\, find what works for you. \nCORAL OWEN: Those are all such key things. And I think a lot of times\, and I’m just going to speak for myself here\, I think so many of us are so accustomed to operating at such a high operational tempo and cadence and just being on overdrive. \nOne of the other things too that come to mind here is\, just talking about deep work. [00:09:00] There’s so many just things that we’re keeping a touch point on day to day. That a lot of times that task switching is what sends me in personally\, into the sort of just overload space where I find that\, sometimes it’s even hard to realize that you need that mental brain break. \nBut yeah\, this is a great suggestion list. Thank you. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, let’s go into emotional rest next. So I think the first two\, the physical rest and the mental rest\, were two that I think we most often would think of when we’re thinking of rest. But emotional rest is also a thing. \nSo this can look like not having to hide your own emotions\, or help others process or carry their emotions. It can also be a break from having to be ‘on’ as a host or a leader\, or just having to be on a break from just having to be on period. If you’re in a helping profession\, or you work in a highly formal setting\, this might be a form of rest that you need. \nOne of the main goals of emotional [00:10:00] rest is having space to be your authentic self without having to be a caretaker for someone else. So some of the signs that you might need emotional rest are maybe you’ve got lots of resentment when people ask you for help\, or you’re feeling overwhelmed by your feelings. Maybe you’re irritable or you want to pick fights over small things. You start\, you know\, yelling at people in traffic or thinking of yelling at them. Like sometimes that’s what I do. I don’t say it out loud\, but I think it. \nOne thing going wrong might ruin your whole day. So that’s another sign that you might need emotional rest\, or maybe you feel like no one actually knows you. And so some ideas for getting this type of rest: maybe schedule time with a friend who knows you really well. \nSchedule some blackout hours where you don’t answer your phone or email. Maybe schedule some buffer times between formal or high stakes situations so that you can prepare [00:11:00] yourself mentally and emotionally\, and so that you can kind of debrief with yourself mentally and emotionally after. \nCORAL OWEN: Just take some space. That’s a great one. Jessica\, is there a fourth? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. The next one is Creative rest. So this is actually\, rather than\, it’s not about taking a break from creativity. This is about space to try new things without needing to be productive. \nSo a lot of us might be in jobs that require a little bit of creativity. Many people are\, even if they don’t think of it that way. Anytime you have to do problem solving or\, you know\, any kind of creation of programming or whatever\, that is creative work. \nBut a lot of people don’t think of it that way. But that’s also being productive. And so this is about the space to try new things\, about having to be productive. So this type of rest is especially important for people who are starting new things. \nPeople who are doing creative or problem solving work\, some signs that you might need this type of [00:12:00] rest are maybe\, you’re jealous of someone else who is trying fun new things. Maybe you’re not enjoying things that you used to love doing. You can’t name a single thing in your life that you don’t have smart goals for. \nOr maybe you’re bored or irritated\, maybe you dream about quitting your job to join the circus or start a business\, or to live alone in the woods. Those are just a few signs that you might need creative rest. \nAnd here’s some examples of what you can do to get this kind of rest. Maybe you could explore something that you’re curious about without an end goal. So just go down a rabbit hole. Or\, you don’t have to have a goal in mind. Just be curious. You could play without pressure to be good at what you’re doing. \nYou don’t have to become skillful at something – you can just play. Maybe trying out a new sport or trying out a new hobby just for [00:13:00] fun. Not having to be perfect at it. Not having to suddenly become good and then monetize it or whatever that is\, like\, just do it for fun. \nCORAL OWEN: That’s such a fun one to end on. What\, just for giggles\, Jess\, what’s something that you would spend your creative rest time on? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I do a lot of things. I often like to joke that I am a – this actually took the pressure off quite a bit: a long time ago\, I decided that my favorite hobby is learning new things and taking on new hobbies\, and trying those hobbies out once. And then putting that away sometimes for many years. \nSo I\, a long time ago\, I used to buy\, like I used to think I was gonna be like a wood carver or whatever\, and I would buy all of the materials for being a wood carver. And then I would maybe make something once. And usually it was beautiful and I was proud of it and I loved it\, but then I wouldn’t want to pick up the tools or anything again. \nAnd so I really [00:14:00] reframed how I thought about my own – so I have not answered your question yet – right now I would say\, I have been doing some creative writing. \nI enjoy writing. A lot of\, I don’t know\, it’s a mix of things\, but sci-fi right now has been what I’ve been writing\, sci-fi comedy kind of thing. And then I also crochet\, but it only\, I only do like one or two projects a year. So how about you? Do you have something? \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah. It’s been fun being a toddler mom. My little guy’s three and a half and his best buddy is five. And just with the kids\, I find that a lot of the creative things that they get into\, of course\, require parental supervision to make sure things don’t go sideways. \nSo like\, we made gingerbread houses last week and they were\, you know\, wildly just creative and fun and nonsensical. I’m like\, “For sure we can have an entire roof of marshmallows. That totally works.” You know\, so just [00:15:00]\, that’s been really fun to actually\, I found myself a lot more\, yeah\, enamored with just the fun little goofy things that these kids get wound up in. \nI’m like\, this is actually a blast. So yeah\, just\, just kid crafts right now. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I went to the library not too long ago with a friend and we\, it was a Lego night\, and we grabbed a Lego kit. Each of us had a Lego kit and we just sat there quietly for the most part. We talked sometimes\, but we were mostly silently putting things together\, and it was lovely. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, just stuff like that. So I think that that’s always a fun place to start too. So\, awesome. \nWell\, Jess\, thank you so much. Very selfishly\, perhaps I’ve really enjoyed this conversation today\, and seeing these new categories\, really\, it does get me excited about rest in a way that I’m normally not. \nI think a lot of us tend to just be in that high performing\, always on space. And so to think through different ways [00:16:00] that we’re not\, you know\, maybe feeling like a\, not a potato\, but being a couch barnacle\, is good. And obviously that’s one of our categories. \nBut\, I think giving ourselves permission to rest in different ways that may align with where we actually need to be\, stepping back or turning that dial down a few notches\, is just\, it’s really nice. Thank you so much. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I really enjoyed this and I really needed it right now\, so it was great. \nCORAL OWEN: Hopefully this also resonated with all of our listeners. And as always\, thank you all so much for joining us. That is it for today’s episode. Also\, we want to pass a special thanks to Erin Carlson Rivera for producing today’s episode. If you enjoyed our talk today\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or a colleague\, and we will be back next week with a new practice. \nUntil then\, keep practicing. \n[00:17:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/beyond-sleep-four-kinds-of-rest-we-all-need/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251225T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251225T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251225T110013Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260108T193332Z
UID:10001714-1766642400-1766682000@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Flamingos and Focus Days: One Simple Practice for a More Intentional Year
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODM2NTYzNCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgzNjU2MzQtZmxhbWluZ29zLWFuZC1mb2N1cy1kYXlzLW9uZS1zaW1wbGUtcHJhY3RpY2UtZm9yLWEtbW9yZS1pbnRlbnRpb25hbC15ZWFyLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTgzNjU2MzQlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 51) \nBefore rushing into big resolutions\, what if you paused to ask: “What needs to stop\, what deserves to stay\, and what small experiment could actually support the life and work I want?”  \nIn this reflections episode\, Coral and Jessica get honest about boundaries\, comparison\, joy\, and work rhythms – and invite you to do the same\, in three simple prompts. \nIn this special reflections episode\, Coral and Jessica step away from resolutions and dig into something more honest: what they’re stopping\, keeping\, and starting in the new year. \nThey talk about protecting a true no meetings day\, letting go of comparison with past versions of themselves\, and keeping small practices like tiny Post‑it to‑do lists\, buffer time between meetings\, and spontaneous phone calls that make work feel more human. \nYou’ll also hear how “getting your pink back” through joy outside of work can change how you show up to your roles. \nThe episode closes with a simple reflection you can do in just a few minutes: name one thing to stop\, one to keep\, and one to start this year. \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\nSubscribe to our newsletter: https://oneop.aweb.page/practicing-connection-newsletter\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hey there. Thanks so much for tuning into the Practicing Connection podcast. I’m Coral\, and today we’re trying something a little different. \nSo this is our reflections episode\, and we’re going to share something that we’re letting go of: one thing we’re keeping and one thing we are starting in the new year. \nAnd the whole idea is to slow down just long enough to notice what is actually working for us\, what’s not\, and what we want to perhaps experiment with next. \nAnd of course\, I am not doing this alone. My lovely co-host\, Jessica\, is here to guide us through it. Jessica\, how are you feeling today? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: “My lovely assistant.” That’s what. I’m doing good. I’m doing great. I’m feeling really motivated. You know\, anytime I get a chance to stop for a moment and assess where I’m at\, it actually feels really good. \nAnd I guess maybe years ago I used to maybe beat myself up a little bit when I would assess where I’m at\, and if it wasn’t sort of quote unquote “good enough” or whatever\, but now it just feels really good. \nJust pause for a [00:01:00] moment\, see where I’m at\, make adjustments. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. I really do feel that too\, and it’s so easy to move from one thing to the next. Just things are so busy\, and I think so many people can relate to that\, and it’s so\, you know\, I think just natural to jump from one thing to the next without pausing to ask\, ‘is this still serving me? What do I wanna do more of?’ \nAnd I am honestly\, I’m really glad that you came up with the idea for this episode\, because I am already planning out my 2026 calendar. And so being able to actually\, you know\, craft this episode with you and walk through it\, it was a great opportunity. \nSo I’m really looking forward to talking through some honest answers today. And yeah\, it’s a good practice. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I’m speaking of honest answers\, we’d love to hear from you\, our listeners\, how have you added moments of pause into your life? Share your strategies with us at practicingconnection@oneop.org. [00:02:00]\n– break – \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So\, let’s talk about the first section of the episode\, what we’re choosing to stop in our professional lives and why. \nSo this is what I’m stopping and one expectation that I want to\, I’m gonna say\, I want to gently stop is the idea that I’m available to meet every day of the week. I have a split appointment across two\, sort of three\, projects\, and the default has become that my calendar is kind of fair game all the time. \nIt’s not sustainable\, and it doesn’t leave much room for the deep focused work that those projects actually require. And I want to be clear\, this is not an expectation that others have placed on me. It’s an expectation that I’ve lived up to by not protecting more time. And it’s kind of funny because I actually feel like I often protect my time through things like time blocking\, but sometimes time blocking isn’t enough. \nSo here’s my stop. I’m working toward at [00:03:00] least one true ‘no meetings’ day each week. I know it may not be perfect right away\, but even naming that boundary and beginning to protect it feels really important. My hope is that it gives me a little more calm\, a little more focus\, and ultimately better work across all the projects I’m responsible for. \nSo Coral\, what’s on your stop list? If I had to sum it up\, mine was kind of about boundaries. What are you putting a boundary around this year? And what do you think about what I just said\, like this ‘no meetings’ day. Did you ever do that? \nCORAL OWEN: Oh yeah\, it’s something I’ve aspired to for quite some time. I actually implemented that for myself this past year. Usually it’s Fridays\, and it has made a huge difference. So I am so excited to see how that serves you in the year. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Did I tell you how many regular meetings I have scheduled for Fridays? They’re regularly scheduled meetings on Fridays. \nCORAL OWEN: I know\, I try to get on your calendar all the time. But no\, that is such a good one. And you know\, one of the sayings [00:04:00] that I love\, and just\, lean back onto quite often is this concept or practice of\, ‘Your no’s protect your yeses.’ And that’s really what this practice for you is making me think of. Saying no to more meeting times so that you can say yes to\, not to put words in your mouth\, but\, you know\, maybe deeper calm\, deeper work\, creativity. \nSo\, personally\, one of the things I am personally parking in 2025\, there’s a few of them\, but the top is the list of the comparison game. And I have worked very diligently and intentionally\, over the past number of years\, to really get good at defining my own measures of success. \nI call it like\, you know\, have your own measuring stick of success\, rather than looking at someone else’s and going\, well\, ‘How do I stack up to that?’ I really am good at\, you know\, keeping the rails on\, and looking just at my own progress and status. \nBut I do\, I have found myself a lot this year. Maybe it’s just the stage of life that I’m in\, in my mid thirties. but I have found myself from time to time thinking\, “Oh\, I used to be [00:05:00] more…” blank\, or\, “Better at… “ blank. And it’s just so not helpful. \nAnd so\, the personal comparison to different seasons of life and different versions of myself is what I am definitely going to stop\, as of 2025. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Coral\, that is wonderful. That was actually my other one I chose. Yes\, it was my other one. This comparison\, and especially professional comparison\, like\, “I have so many amazing colleagues that are doing so many amazing things\,” and I often look at their work and I’m like\, “Oh wow. Well\, what I’m doing isn’t nearly as good as what they’re doing.” \nBut the thing is\, I’ve heard the same thing other people have said\, “Whoa\, what you’re doing is really amazing.” And so I think we all kind of do it to each other\, but it can lead to unhealthy thoughts about your own work. It can lead to unhealthy thoughts about your season of life. And yeah\, that was my other one\, but I decided to talk [00:06:00] mostly about protecting my time instead. \nCORAL OWEN: Wow. Yeah\, both of those are very impactful\, so probably a lot of real relatability there. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, once you clear out a few stops\, it’s easier to see what’s worth holding onto. So let’s talk about what we’re keeping\, Coral. Let’s start with you. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah. So I know that we are focusing on the professional realm here\, but there is a lot of overlap\, at least that I found in\, you know\, just kind of energetic availability and bandwidth of how your personal life allows you to show up in your professional life. And so I’m\, you know – three and a half years postpartum and momming and just wearing a lot of different hats\, has really absorbed my time. \nAnd I had a friend recently\, she shared an anecdote about how flamingos – just stay with me here about how flamingos\, they lose their vibrant coloration while caring for their young\, like just a very intense season. And as they come out of that period\, they get their pink back bit by bit. [00:07:00] I loved that and it really resonated with me. \nAnd what I’ve related to this closely this past year is I’ve begun to create and hold space for things. Mainly in\, you know\, kind of my personal side of life\, like playing music again and you know\, being more intentional. Just these small things that have kind of fallen by the wayside since\, you know\, having my son a couple years ago. \nAnd I really feel like I am stepping back into that full color version of myself. And the reason I’m talking about this is that just this like joy and spark\, it’s allowed me to tap into that creative side professionally a lot more. And I just\, I feel like I have just a lot more like solution space thinking: positive\, kind of diverse avenues of like where we could take a particular project or insights\, it just feels good. \nSo yeah\, I’m just\, I’m going to keep holding space for just those small touch points that have nothing to do with my identity\, or maybe a little bit [00:08:00] of\, you know\, mom visits. There’s always some overlap\, right? \nBut yeah\, just those kind of seemingly nonsensical things that just bring whimsy and joy and a lot of creativity to a lot of different spaces. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love that. And I love this idea of\, during times of intense\, we might lose our color a little bit. And then\, when things have calmed down a little bit\, you can come back. I love the phrase\, stepping back into your ‘full color self.’ \nThat’s beautiful. Well\, I brought a few keeps with me\, so you can stop me anytime and just make me shut up because I couldn’t choose between them. \nSo one thing I’m definitely keeping\, and this is such a little logistical detail\, but I have these tiny two and a half – they’re not really that tiny\, they’re just the standard size post-it notes. I think they’re about two and a half by two and a half inches. That’s where I write my daily to-dos. It sounds kind of silly\, but limiting myself to what fits on that little [00:09:00] square has made a really big difference. It forces me to choose what really matters for the day. \nAnd I actually also\, I try not to fill it. I try to only fill the top two thirds of it\, but it forces me to choose what really matters. And it keeps me from staring at a huge list and feeling immediately overwhelmed. And on days when I actually stick to the post-it\, pun not really intended\, I end the day feeling more accomplished and less frazzled. \nSo for me\, that little square is not just a piece of paper\, it is a daily prioritization practice that I want to carry forward. \nCORAL OWEN: So Jess\, this is so funny. I actually started doing that a couple months ago too. It’s such a game changer. Good for you. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, yeah\, I have\, oh\, I gotta lie. So I’m also keeping the habit of building buffer time between meetings. Only a month or two ago I started to space [00:10:00] things out a little bit more intentionally\, even though it does make my calendar look and feel a little bit cluttered\, to be honest. I need to figure out what to do about that feeling of being cluttered. \nBut the breathing room has been huge. It’s given me time to process\, to reset\, to jot some notes or just grab water. Sometimes I’ll take like a five minute walk\, instead of just jumping from one thing to the next on fumes\, or coming in late to meetings. \nAnd look. I don’t mind the whole lateness thing. But it’s more\, I feel stressed if I’m joining a meeting late. It doesn’t mean that my days are magically slow or easy\, but those buffers have made my schedule feel a lot more humane. So that’s definitely something I want to keep doing. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, there’s even like research to back that up about task switching\, and how much time it takes you to shift from one 15 or 20 minutes or\, it’s at least that long. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, it’s why interruptions can be really difficult for people. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And I did bring one more. I wasn’t going to share it and – \nCORAL OWEN: Good [00:11:00] things come in threes. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Okay. Yeah. Right. So the last keep for me is making more phone calls. I rediscovered recently how much I love a good no-video call\, or even if it’s video\, a quick unexpected check-in where someone’s just calling me on Teams\, randomly. \nSo\, even if the call is in video\, as long as it’s spontaneous\, I’ll take it. I’m also holding the assumption that if I call someone randomly\, spontaneously\, I have zero expectation that they’ll answer. And if they call me\, I’m making the assumption that they feel the same if they’re just calling me randomly. \nThat removes a lot of pressure\, and it keeps it from falling onto the to-do list. Because you know\, text and email are great\, and instant messaging or messaging apps\, but sometimes all of those written messages – and as we were talking about before we started recording\, even a recorded message that is sent to you the same way that a written message would be sent to you – it just kind of feels like another pile of [00:12:00] tasks sometimes that I need to get to. \nSo picking up the phone even briefly has helped me feel a little bit more connected\, and a little bit less buried in text-based communication. So that’s a practice I want to keep\, but I promise I won’t do it to anyone who really abhors phone calls. \nCORAL OWEN: I definitely have my phone call people\, and then my text people\, and then my voice memo. Yeah\, just know your people. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Exactly. And you know\, you can even talk ahead of time. If there’s a new connection you’re making\, you could say\, “Hey\, I enjoy phone calls\, even random ones. I won’t do that if that’s not something that you like. But if you’re okay with it\, I have no expectation you’re gonna pick up. But sometimes I think that’s nice.” \nAnd believe it or not\, there are some people who are like\, yeah\, “I’m cool with that.” \nCORAL OWEN: I just love that\, that’s such a simple way to practice connection going into the new year. That’s awesome. \nAlright\, so Jess\, we’ve talked about some things to let go. We’ve talked and honored about what’s working. [00:13:00] Let’s perhaps move into imagining what’s next. So what little experiments do we want to try this year? Do you want to go first? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I’ll go first. So the new practice that I’m starting is kind of related to that boundary I mentioned earlier. I feel like it’s almost cheating\, because I already mentioned it. \nI want to institute a true ‘no meetings’ day. I’ve been thinking about this for a while\, but I’m ready to treat it as a real experiment\, instead of just a nice idea. \nMy hope is that carving out one meeting-free day will help my work feel calmer\, more connected and more creative. Calmer\, because I’m not scrambling from call to call more\, connected\, because I can actually focus on the relationships and the projects and\, you know\, some of the creative work and the deep work in front of me\, and more creative because there’s finally that uninterrupted time and space to think and to make. \nSo it might take some negotiation with my different teams\, but that’s the thing I’m committed [00:14:00] to trying to start. I may have to begin with two half days and work my way up to a whole day\, but I have to start somewhere. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So I\, again\, I’m very excited to see how that works out for you. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Me too. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, so for me personally\, I think I already alluded a bit to how this recent season of life has been a little bit of a ‘hold onto your hat’ sort of operation. And ultimately just kind of has left me feeling a bit more reactive than proactive. \nSo I actually am a business owner\, as well as my podcasting endeavors here\, and so one of the things that I am looking forward to just doubling down on going forward into 2026 is holding Mondays specifically as a strategy day of\, it’s actually very similar to yours\, of deeper work\, longer range planning\, and really moving the needle on some bigger initiatives\, rather than just kind of trying to keep the boat afloat. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: You guys\, we did not plan that\, to have such similar – but well\, let’s get [00:15:00] into a reflection for all of the listeners. So\, here it is. Are you ready? \nCORAL OWEN: Ready. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: All you have to do is jot down. So grab paper and pen\, or get out your keyboard or your tablet. Jot down one thing to stop\, one thing to keep\, and one thing to start in the new year. \nI bet you didn’t know we were going to do that. We were going to go for – \nCORAL OWEN: Coming in from left field. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, right. One thing to stop\, one thing to keep and one thing to start in the new year. \nCORAL OWEN: Simple\, but so impactful. Awesome. \nThanks Jessica\, so much\, for the great conversation\, the awesome practices and stops and starts that you shared today. It was really fun talking through all of that\, and we look forward to hearing from you all\, as you’re working through your own reflections on 2025 and going into the new year with some fresh perspective and practices. \nAnd so that is all for this [00:16:00] episode. Thank you so much for joining us\, and we will be back next week with a new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/end-of-the-year-reflection/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251218T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251218T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251218T110056Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251218T153815Z
UID:10001713-1766037600-1766077200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Leading Through Uncertainty: Navigating Ambiguity as an Adaptive Practice
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODM2NTQ5MSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgzNjU0OTEtbGVhZGluZy10aHJvdWdoLXVuY2VydGFpbnR5LW5hdmlnYXRpbmctYW1iaWd1aXR5LWFzLWFuLWFkYXB0aXZlLXByYWN0aWNlLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTgzNjU0OTElMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 50) \nLeading in uncertainty is not about having all the answers; it’s about how you show up when you don’t.  \nIn this episode\, explore two simple practices that help you anchor in what matters and keep moving\, even when the path ahead is anything but clear. \nAmbiguity is not just a strategy or org‑chart issue; it is a human constant in modern work. In this conversation\, Jessica and Coral reframe uncertainty as an adaptive practice rather than a problem to “fix fast\,” especially for leaders who feel pressure to hold it all together. \nYou’ll learn two grounded tools: a Values‑Based Decision Filter to choose direction when information is incomplete\, and The Next Small Step to move the work one inch forward without needing the full plan. \nTogether\, they offer “handrails\, not heroics” for navigating uncertainty with steadiness\, honesty\, and care for yourself and your team. \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\nSubscribe to our newsletter: https://oneop.aweb.page/practicing-connection-newsletter\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, and welcome back to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica. \nCORAL OWEN: Hey everybody. I’m Coral. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Today we’re taking on a topic that shows up everywhere this time of year\, and I would argue always\, in organizations\, in teams\, and in our personal lives. And that’s the experience of not knowing\, not having all the answers\, not being sure what’s next. In other words\, ambiguity. \nCORAL OWEN: Yep. And the truth is ambiguity. It isn’t just a workplace issue\, right\, Jess? It’s not a leadership issue either. It’s a human issue\, and anytime something is changing\, whether it’s a strategy\, a role\, a habit\, a direction\, there is this window of time where you don’t\, and we don’t have the full picture yet. And that gap\, it can feel really uncomfortable. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, it really can. And I think a lot of times\, leaders especially [00:01:00] feel responsible for holding it together during those moments\, even when they are just as affected by the uncertainty as everyone else. \nCORAL OWEN: That is so true\, and this is why we wanted to talk about ambiguity from a different angle today\, not just as something to push through or fix as fast as possible\, even though that’s probably what we would most like to do. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. \nCORAL OWEN: But rather is something that we can learn to navigate more intentionally\, and something that we can practice in grounded and very human ways. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So to help us get into this conversation\, you brought two practices to explore\, and I’m really curious: not why these specific practices\, but why bring practices at all into a conversation about ambiguity. \nCORAL OWEN:Yeah\, that’s a really good question\, Jess. So\, ambiguity\, it feels big and fuzzy and when things feel that way\, people tend to either freeze or overwork like kind of at the extremes. \nSo these practices and practices period\, it helps us create a bit [00:02:00] more structure where there might not be a whole lot of structure in the moment. \nAnd it’s not to control the uncertainty\, but it gives us a way and a framework within which to engage and show up within it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So it’s kind of like a way to stay steady. When the situation isn’t steady at all\, when it’s swirling all around us. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. It’s a way to just kind of anchor us and give us\, you know\, a guidepost by which to navigate. And the two practices that we’re going to be going through today\, it’s the values-based decision filter and the next small step. They’re actually not related to resolving ambiguity\, although probably. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Now I’m really confused! \nCORAL OWEN: I know our listeners are probably like\, “Wait\, what? How is this even helpful?” \nBut\, you know\, hang in there with us. So these are all about helping you move through it without losing your grounding. One helps orient you\, and the other helps you move in the direction of resolution. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, so it’s more like handrails than solutions. Or like walking sticks.[00:03:00]\nCORAL OWEN: Jess. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Stop me now before I keep going. \nCORAL OWEN: Okay. We’re just gonna roll with it. So yes\, they’re like simple things that you could hold onto\, and the path ahead isn’t fully visible and gives you stability. How’d you like that? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love it. I love a good walking stick too\, by the way. So before we get into the practices\, let’s talk about why ambiguity is so hard in the first place. Because it’s not just a leadership challenge\, right? It’s not only for leaders and people in leadership positions. It’s a human challenge. \nCORAL OWEN: Definitely\, and ambiguity taps into our most fundamental wiring. As humans\, we all want patterns. We want predictability. Because it’s safety\, right? It’s security and it’s knowing. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: We want to put things in boxes neatly with a bow\, yep. \nCORAL OWEN: And life is anything but\, and so we want to know what’s expected of us. It gives us a way to understand where things are headed and what’s going on. And so when information is incomplete\, or paradigms [00:04:00] are shifting\, oftentimes we’ll feel anxious and patient and thrown off. \nAnd it’s not just our team. It’s oftentimes the leaders that are rolling through this while also trying to give some assurance in these times. So\, it’s a tough space to be in for a lot of people. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, well\, and then on top of that\, leaders often feel pressure to have answers for others when they don’t have the answers for themselves\, yet they can’t even give those answers\, so that’s gotta feel really tough. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. I know that both of us have been in leadership roles. I’ve certainly felt this way in the past\, when guiding different organizations and teams\, and it is\, I truly believe\, one of the most difficult aspects of leadership\, is leading through these times of change or ambiguity. \nYou’re thinking\, “Ah\, I should know more\, I should be further along\, I should have this guidance.” But we’re rolling through something called Adaptive Leadership Practices today\, and it’s not having everything figured out. It’s about helping to help everyone else stay steady in the discomfort and move [00:05:00] through uncertainty together. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, let’s talk more about that. This idea of ambiguity as something we practice\, not something we magically become comfortable with. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, exactly. Adaptive leadership means learning to make progress\, even when information is incomplete. Like we were saying earlier\, a lot of people tend to either kind of freeze or rush\, and maybe it’s not in the most productive direction. \nAnd so\, this is all about moving in small intentional ways\, making sure that we’re making steady progress\, not getting ahead of our skis\, and letting clarity emerge through action and not before it. \nAlso\, it’s relational. It means leaders aren’t navigating ambiguity alone. You know\, teams make sense of this change together. The conversations are creating clarity collaboratively\, and sometimes the best thing a leader can say\, and sometimes it’s hard to do this\, but something along the lines of\, “Here’s what we know today\, and here’s what we’re still figuring out.’ \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that kind of [00:06:00] honesty builds trust\, instead of pretending everything is sorted when it isn’t. I can think of one amazing example\, and I’ve had the opportunity to tell him several times\, you know\, we were going through some pretty turbulent times for a while\, as we completely shifted the way we operated as an organization. \nAnd by we\, I’m not talking about OneOp\, I’m talking about the other organization that I belong to. But\, that is a skill. It’s a skill to be able to do that. Something that we can practice. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. And I think\, you know\, just what you noted there\, Jess\, you know\, a skill is something that can be cultivated and practiced. It’s not something that everybody’s inherently good at. Just like\, “Oh yes\, I’m wonderful at change.” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. \nCORAL OWEN: So yeah\, that’s what we’re hoping to help you all with today. \nAlright\, let’s go ahead\, and that’s a great segue into our first practice\, which is the Values Based Decision Filter. Sounds pretty official\, but it’s very approachable. So\, essentially when things are feeling uncertain\, we often wait for more information\, like we already [00:07:00] talked about before: making a decision. \nBecause with more information we feel like we can make a more correct choice. But sometimes what we need is actually a way to choose the next direction based on our values\, and not on complete clarity. \nSo here’s how this value-based decision filter works. First off\, you’re going to name the value that matters most in this season. Not all your values\, just one. “What’s the most clear guiding value here?” It might be integrity\, transparency\, learning\, stability\, compassion\, courage. There’s a whole number of them that you can choose from. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I just wanted to\, we did this in another episode and I just want to clarify the ‘season’ comment. What do we mean by ‘season\,’ really quick? We’re not necessarily talking about the winter season\, which we happen to be recording right now in December. But\, yeah\, what do we mean by season? \nCORAL OWEN: Thanks Jess. So in case y’all missed that mini conversation within an episode\, one or two back perhaps\, by season\, simply referring [00:08:00] to this chapter that we’re most recently moving through. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And so the first step then is just naming the value that matters most in this season\, which is\, that is what you decide. You decide what the season is\, and you decide what that one value is most important to you right now. \nCORAL OWEN: So from there\, step two\, you’re going to ask which option\, even if it’s small or imperfect\, aligns most with this value. And the whole idea is that this filter\, it gives you a way to move forward without having to wait for all of the answers to be provided\, or to come into the light. And so this value becomes your compass by which you can make small\, incremental moves forward. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I love how grounded that feels. You’re not forcing certainty\, you’re just choosing direction based on what matters most right now. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. So values can help you find and they can give structure when the circumstances may not lend themselves to such. \nAlrighty. So part two is the next small [00:09:00] step. So when ambiguity feels overwhelming\, and it can certainly happen from time to time\, usually it’s because we’re trying to solve the whole situation at once. So instead of trying to tackle the whole elephant\, in one bite\, as my father might say\, you instead want to pause and ask\, “What is the next small step I can take that moves us one inch forward?” \nJust one step. Just one inch. Something that you can do in the next day or the week and something that doesn’t necessarily require full clarity. \nAlright\, so just some examples\, because that could feel a little bit nebulous maybe. Maybe it’s setting up a meeting to gather perspectives. Maybe it’s clarifying one decision that can be made now. You might take a crack at drafting their first version of something. \nA couple other thoughts: Maybe it’s testing one small piece of a larger idea\, like a\, you know\, kind of a mini pilot test. You might put a temporary structure into place\, and so sometimes\, these might be ‘no thank you’ bytes of like\, “Ooh\, we tried [00:10:00] that\, it didn’t work.” \nBut\, you know\, often clarity emerges and we can derive that from action. Or just doing a little bit of a/b testing\, rather than just sitting still. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that takes so much pressure off. You don’t have to solve everything. That was also me just telling myself that right now you don’t have to solve everything\, just move the work forward in a way that’s honest and manageable. \nAnd\, you know\, sometimes that’s actually just reaching out to a person to check in on\, like\, how their leg of the project is going. Sometimes it is setting up a meeting and doing something a little bit bigger than that. \nBut I just wanted to also mention that it could be super small\, like just reaching out to someone. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, just to keep that touch point and that momentum alive\, nurturing it. So yeah\, ambiguity\, it becomes much more tolerable when we break it into smaller adaptive steps. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So as we wrap up today\, maybe take a moment to reflect on an area of your life or your leadership where things feel a little unclear: not to [00:11:00] fix it\, just to notice it. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. Ambiguity\, it’s not something that we will unfortunately ever eliminate. But it is something that we can learn to navigate with more steadiness and intention\, and hopefully these two practices of anchoring your decisions and your values and taking the next small step can help you stay grounded while still making progress. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I feel like if we had a title for this episode that was\, “Solving Uncertainty\,” we’d probably get a lot of listeners\, but then they would be disappointed that we were just trying to help them move through! \nAnyway\, thanks so much for joining us for this conversation on navigating ambiguity as an adaptive practice. \nIf this episode resonated with you\, feel free to share it with someone who might be navigating their own season of uncertainty. \nCORAL OWEN: We will be back soon with another episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \n[00:12:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/leading-through-uncertainty/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251211T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251211T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251211T110008Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251210T221940Z
UID:10001712-1765432800-1765472400@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Letting Go to Move Forward: Creating Space for Your Next Self
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODI5OTQ0NSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgyOTk0NDUtbGV0dGluZy1nby10by1tb3ZlLWZvcndhcmQtY3JlYXRpbmctc3BhY2UtZm9yLXlvdXItbmV4dC1zZWxmLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTgyOTk0NDUlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 49) \nFeeling between versions of yourself – no longer who you were\, not yet who you’re becoming?  \nIn this episode\, learn two simple practices to release what no longer fits and take aligned\, micro‑actions that move you forward with clarity and steadiness.  \nProfessionals who navigate this “liminal” space well build resilience and better decisions during change. \nIdentity shifts don’t happen on a calendar – they unfold in the in‑between\, where the old no longer fits and the new isn’t solid yet. \nThis conversation introduces two grounded practices: Subtract Before You Add (making space by letting go of one expectation\, role\, or internal rule) and The Values Check‑In (choosing one value for this season and taking a 2–5 minute micro‑action that lives it). \nThese approaches reflect evidence‑aligned ideas that subtracting creates clarity and capacity\, and that values‑based actions engage motivation and sustain change – especially during transitions at work and in life. \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\nSubscribe to our newsletter: https://oneop.aweb.page/practicing-connection-newsletter\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: Hi\, and thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica. \nCORAL OWEN: And I’m Coral. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Today we’re digging into something a lot of us feel this time of year\, even if we don’t always have the language for it. The experience of being in between versions of ourselves\, that stretch of time where the old ways of doing things don’t quite fit anymore\, but the new ways haven’t fully settled in yet. \nCORAL OWEN: Yep. And that “in between it” can feel really strange\, uncomfortable. Even can feel a little bit disorienting. And so often we’re really quick to jump into new habits and new roles without acknowledging that transitions have their own emotional terrain and strain\, and identity work. \nIt also does not happen instantaneously\, and so it doesn’t happen\, you know\, like a light switch. Once the calendar flips to January\, it’s like\, okay\, here we are\, the whole new year\, new me. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yep. \nCORAL OWEN: Doesn’t really happen that way. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Right. I mean [00:01:00] there is an element of\, I’ve heard some good arguments for the element of ‘fake it till you make it\,’ but you don’t just flip a switch and suddenly you’re a different person. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, for sure. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So before we go any further\, then\, let’s ground this in a simple definition. When we talk about identity shifts\, we mean the gradual process of moving from who we’ve been: our habits\, roles\, expectations\, into who we’re becoming. And there’s always a period of transition where both feel a little bit unclear. Isn’t that referred to as liminal space? \nCORAL OWEN: Yes. Exactly. We’ve actually done a couple of great episodes on liminal space. Shameless flag! \nExactly though\, Jessica\, it’s not about reinventing yourself in some dramatic way. It’s kind of like shedding skin\, right? And it’s about recognizing that you are changing\, like in the process of becoming\, and giving yourself permission to learn and experiment and adjust without needing everything straight away to feel polished and [00:02:00] certain. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So I noticed that you brought two practices today. Not a long list\, not a whole framework or anything like that\, just two practices. Why these two specifically? \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, so identity transitions\, they already ask a lot from us energetically. You know\, brain space\, all that. So we don’t need more complexity. What we need are some grounded entry points that help us understand what is shifting and what is supporting us as we move through this transition. \nSo today we’ve got two practices. The first one is called\, ‘subtract before you add.’ And I’m really excited about this one\, because I don’t think it gets quite as much airtime\, like this process of becoming. \nAnd then the second one is called the\, ‘values check-in.’ And they are intended – you don’t have to use them together\, but they can work together really seamlessly to create a really smooth\, grounded space for you to begin your transition. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love that. Keeping it simple but meaningful. \nCORAL OWEN: Yep. [00:03:00] And one helps you\, the first one\, I think I gave a little maybe extra love to the\, “Subtract before you add.” \nThis one will help you release what doesn’t fit or what doesn’t feel in alignment anymore. And the other one anchors you into what matters most right now. And so together\, they give you clarity without forcing you to have the whole picture figured out. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, let’s get into the practices then. Can you get us started Coral? \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So first\, let’s start with the subtract before you add. So a lot of people think identity change. When we think about these things\, the instinct is to start stacking new habits straight away\, or expectations on top of what is already a full life. \nAnd you know. We’ve got plenty of hats that we’re already wearing. But a lot of times this identity work usually begins most effectively by letting go initially\, not by adding more straight to the plate. \nSo here’s the reflection at some point. Whether it’s this week that you’re making these changes\, or when you’re feeling\, you know\, [00:04:00] ready to start making these shifts\, ask yourself \, “What expectation\, roles\, or stories am I hearing that don’t fit who I am becoming?” Whether this is like a personal shift or a life shift. \nSo just some offhand examples may be\, you know\, feeling like the person who always says yes to things. Maybe you feel responsible for smoothing things over all the time. And these are not bad things\, right? But these are maybe things that maybe are not serving you in this next space that you’re moving into. \nA couple of other things that maybe\, a standard of productivity\, or perhaps a different version of yourself from a different season of life that is not going to be in alignment for where you’re headed. And so we start with that. \nAnd then from there\, you’re going to ask yourself\, “What is one thing that I could set down for this season?” \nSo it’s not something that you have to say adieu to forever\, but just one thing that you are sticking a pin in: one pressure\, one role\, one internal rule that may not be in [00:05:00] alignment for where you’re headed. That’s it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Coral that feels really doable. And I imagine even naming just one thing could create a surprising amount of space. \nCORAL OWEN: That is one hundred percent it. So we have to\, with just these full fledged identities that we’re carrying\, the narrative stories\, identities\, habits that go along with who we have been\, we have to create space and make room for something. \nSo by subtracting a little bit\, setting something down\, we are holding space and creating\, you know\, kind of a little spot for\, those new habits\, identity\, awarenesses and things to take shape and take root. \nAll right\, so that is part one\, creating space. We’re just sticking a pin in some things to hold space for the next bit of what is to come. The second practice that we’ve got for y’all today is called the ‘values check-in.’ \nSo when we’re in these transitional identity spaces\, sometimes [00:06:00] things can just feel a little bit blurry\, but values provide the clarity that we need even when the direction is still forming. \nSo here’s how this works. You want to choose one value that feels most important in this season\, not your top five for life\, just the one that is going to\, you know\, be most in alignment for right now. Maybe it’s stability\, courage\, health\, connection\, integrity\, curiosity\, you decide. And then we’re going to ask ourselves\, “How would I know I’m living with this value?” What does it look like in small concrete behaviors? \nNot big sweeping goals\, just indicators. You know\, things like ending your workday on time\, taking one small step towards something you care about. Maybe it’s checking in with someone you want to stay connected to. Maybe it’s honoring your bandwidth and just saying no to something\, that you perhaps would’ve originally said yes to. \nAnd then finally\, “What is one micro action that I [00:07:00] can take this week that aligns with that value?” Two to five minutes\, or one simple statement – it doesn’t have to be anything huge. \nAnd so really\, coming down to the crux of this\, everything in a nutshell\, identity grows through consistent\, aligned actions. Not\, like\, stepping into the brand new identity one day. It’s this gradual process of becoming\, and so there’s a lot of thoughts around setting habits to step into identity. \nAnd so that’s where this practice is rooted. Just setting those small\, intentional actions and habits in our day so that we are stepwise walking our way into that next version of ourselves that we want to become. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: This reminds me a lot of\, there was a book series I was reading\, it was just a fiction series\, and I remember the character in that was like\, “I’m gonna be known as girl who does this\, or the girl with a really nice sports car\,” whatever it was like\, and she was really confused about her identity\, right? \nThat [00:08:00] was this kind of surface level. She was wanting to project this out there\, and she wasn’t connecting back to like what the actual values were. Which – obviously it was a fiction book\, it was not meant to be super deep or anything – but it reminds me of that\, and these activities are a helpful way to move forward without forcing clarity. \nYou know\, you might not know everything about who you’re becoming yet\, but you can live your values today. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. Values can guide in that correct trajectory\, even when certainty or that solidified identity hasn’t fully arrived to us yet. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I just want to ask a question for some clarity. You’ve said in both of these activities you were talking about\, “in this season.” What do you mean by that? Is it that that season could just be right now\, just giving yourself the permission that it doesn’t have to be forever? \nOr are you talking about the new year? What do you mean when you say\, “Decide what’s right in this season?” \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah. Thanks for [00:09:00] picking up on that\, Jess. That’s a phraseology that I actually use for myself quite often. But just to unpack that\, in case it was a little confusing\, you know\, we are always\, hopefully\, growing and iterating on what that next best version of ourselves is. \nWe’re constantly learning\, and I know the people in our Practicing Connection community\, we’re constantly learning new things\, and maybe realizing new things or taking on new roles\, whether it’s personal or at work. \nAnd so with that comes about changes in just who we are fundamentally. I mean\, we’re picking up new skill sets or new identities or new habits. And so\, you know\, maybe we’ve been in a particular role or wearing a particular hat for some time\, and as we are iterating in our self-identity and how we are walking through the world\, I think that viewing it as different seasons of life and who we are in different phases of our entire lifespan can be a really helpful framework to [00:10:00] step from season to season to season. \nAnd with that\, kind of like how a tree has different sets of leaves that it has throughout the year (unless you’re here in Florida!)\, you know\, who we are can look different. It’s beautiful throughout. But sometimes we need to shed those leaves in the fall and kind of have that regrowth and reboot. \nAnd that’s how I see this set of practices coming together\, that we can kind of shed some leaves so that we’re growing new ones that are going to serve us in that next season. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love that you used the metaphor of a tree\, and I’m sure that\, I mean\, it’s used all the time in this kind of a context. This is all reminding me of Lev Vygotsky’s Theory of Psychological Development\, and the emphasis on development as a continuing process of transformation. \nAnd that’s exactly what you’re talking about. That’s what these practices help you do. \nSo\, as we wrap up today\, maybe take a moment\, you know\, wherever you are\, to pause and acknowledge where you were at in your own in-between season. You don’t [00:11:00] have to have it all sorted out or anything. Just notice what’s shifting. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. And just like we were talking about\, this doesn’t happen in one day\, and so this identity work does not need to be rushed. The in-between space\, this is where so much learning and clarity happens and becomes and takes shape for us. \nAnd these two practices of subtracting what no longer fits\, and then grounding ourselves in values that align for where we’re headed\, can really help us navigate the space with more steadiness and tension and just more grace. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Thanks so much for joining us for this conversation on navigating identity shifts in the in-between. If this resonated with you\, feel free to share it with someone who might be in their own season of becoming. \nCORAL OWEN: We will be back next week with another episode. Until then\, keep practicing. \n[00:12:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/letting-go-to-move-forwards/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
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DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251205T073000
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CREATED:20251205T152152Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260112T155242Z
UID:10001640-1764919800-1764921600@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Foundations of Trust & Collaboration Podcast Bundle
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_raw_html]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[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Bundle” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text]This learning bundle consists of six podcast episodes\, each focused on a core aspect of building trust and connection within teams. The series is designed for professionals seeking practical\, research-based strategies to improve teamwork\, communication\, and group facilitation. Each episode introduces a key concept\, shares examples\, and guides listeners through actionable practices. \nTopics Covered:\n \n\nWelcoming Practices: How to intentionally create a more welcoming environment in teams and groups\, including strategies for opening up to new possibilities and perspectives. \nSincerity: Exploring the role of sincerity in trust-building\, with reflective exercises to align words and intentions and foster authentic communication.\nReliability and Clear Communication: Understanding the importance of clear requests\, direct communication\, and accountability in collaborative work.\nCompetence and Self-Assessment: Techniques for assessing and communicating personal and team capabilities\, recognizing strengths and limits\, and seeking support when needed.\nCare and Compassion: The foundational role of care in trust\, with practices for showing care\, listening to concerns\, and building meaningful relationships.\nActive Listening and Deep Respect: Facilitating group processes for all group members\, practicing active listening\, and cultivating psychological safety.\n\nLearning Objectives: \n\nDescribe the four distinctions of trust – sincerity\, reliability\, competence\, care -and their role in team/group development.\nDemonstrate practices for welcoming and including all collaborators (team/group members) to foster connection and collaboration.\nDemonstrate active listening and deep respect to enhance psychological safety within groups/teams.\nCommunicate needs and expectations clearly to support reliability and accountability in collaborative work.\nReflect on personal and team capabilities to identify strengths\, limits\, and opportunities for support.\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” top_padding=”20″ text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Podcast Speakers” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” bottom_padding=”20″ left_padding_desktop=”5″ text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][image_with_animation image_url=”212896″ image_size=”custom” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default” custom_image_size=”thumb”][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Jessica Beckendorf” font_container=”tag:h3|text_align:left” use_theme_fonts=”yes”][vc_column_text]\n\n\nUniversity of Wisconsin-Madison Extension \n\n\n\n\nJessica is the Principal Investigator for OneOp’s Building Communities team\, supporting military families through promoting collaborative leadership and systems thinking. Co-host of Practicing Connection\, Jessica holds a BA in Urban and Regional Studies from UW-Green Bay and an Master of Arts in Communication and Leadership Studies from Gonzaga University\, and is dedicated to fostering resourceful\, well-connected communities. \n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” bottom_padding=”20″ left_padding_desktop=”5″ text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][image_with_animation image_url=”147464″ image_size=”custom” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default” custom_image_size=”thumb”][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Coral Owen” font_container=”tag:h3|text_align:left” use_theme_fonts=”yes”][vc_column_text]Coral Owen holds a Master of Science in Health Education & Behavior from the University of Florida and combines strategic thinking with real-world adaptability. As a former military spouse\, she brings empathy and resilience to her work supporting diverse communities. Her background in adult education and experience in military-connected environments strengthen her ability to design meaningful programs and foster collaboration. Coral is dedicated to empowering others through education\, wellness\, and purposeful leadership.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” bottom_padding=”20″ left_padding_desktop=”5″ text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][image_with_animation image_url=”212460″ image_size=”custom” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default” custom_image_size=”thumb”][/vc_column_inner][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Bob Bertsch” font_container=”tag:h3|text_align:left” use_theme_fonts=”yes”][vc_column_text]\n\n\nNorth Dakota State University \n\n\n\n\nBob Bertsch is the OneOp National Project Leader. Bertsch\, an Extension Specialist at North Dakota State University\, has been an integral part of OneOp since 2011. He oversees strategic initiatives to enhance OneOp’s ability to support military family service providers and strengthen the Military Family Readiness System. \n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Continuing Education (CE) Credit” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”jumbo” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” el_class=”Continuing Education Survey” button_id=”Continuing Education Survey” text=”Continuing Education Survey” url=”https://auburn.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0kMbXpXnu9oOXZk”][vc_column_text]\n\n\n\nCertified in Family and Consumer Sciences (CFCS): This webinar has been approved for 1.0 continuing education (CE) credit from the American Association for Family and Consumer Sciences (AAFCS). Note: Eligibility for CE credit will close December 4th\, 2027.\nBoard Certified Case Managers: This webinar has been approved for 1.0 continuing education (CE) clock hour from the Commission for Case Manager Certification (CCMC). Note: Eligibility for CE credit will close December 4th\, 2026.\nCertified Family Life Educators (CFLE): This webinar has been approved for 1.0 continuing education (CE) credit from the National Council on Family Relations (NCFR). Note: Eligibility for CE credit will close December 4th\, 2028.\nHuman Resource Professionals: This webinar has been approved for 1.0 continuing education (CE) credit from the Society for Human Resource Management (SHRM). Note: Eligibility for CE credit will close July 31\, 2026.\nSocial Workers\, Licensed Professional Counselors\, and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists: This webinar has been approved for 1.0 continuing education (CE) credit from the University of Texas at Austin School of Social Work. Check with your state licensing agency for reciprocity and/or credit approval if licensed for other professions or in one of the following states: CO\, FL\, HI\, IA\, KS\, KY\, MI\, NY\, ND\, OH\, OK. Note: Eligibility for CE credit will close December 4th\, 2027.\nOneOp Certificates of Attendance are available for those interested in additional documentation of professional development activities.\n\n\nIf the survey button above does not appear\, please access the continuing education survey here: https://auburn.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0kMbXpXnu9oOXZk. If you have any questions\, contact ce@oneop.org. \n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/foundations-podcast-bundle/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/11/qtq80-SG5xif.jpeg
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251204T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251204T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251204T110028Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251203T223620Z
UID:10001710-1764828000-1764867600@oneop.org
SUMMARY:7 Small Practices for Better Conversations
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODI1OTU1NSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgyNTk1NTUtNy1zbWFsbC1wcmFjdGljZXMtZm9yLWJldHRlci1jb252ZXJzYXRpb25zLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTgyNTk1NTUlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 48) \nIn this episode of Practicing Connection\, Coral and Jessica explore empathetic listening: what it is\, why it matters\, and how a few simple shifts in how you listen can deepen your relationships and improve how you work with others. \nThis practicast explores empathetic listening as a practical communication skill. We compare empathetic listening with familiar active listening techniques\, share personal experiences of when basic reflection felt flat or even patronizing\, and then walk through a concrete\, seven-step process you can try in everyday conversations. \nDrawing on communication research and Jessica’s own practice\, the episode highlights how noticing emotions\, staying present\, and checking your understanding can reduce misunderstandings and support stronger\, more collaborative relationships at work and at home. \nLinks\n\nSubscribe to our newsletter: https://oneop.aweb.page/practicing-connection-newsletter\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Actively listening with empathy can help us build emotionally supportive environments\, nurture authentic relationships\, and enhance collaboration and teamwork. \nHey everyone\, welcome to this week’s Practicing Connection practicast. I’m Coral. Today we’re sharing the practice of empathetic listening\, which is an approach that builds deeper connections by bringing empathy to our conversations. My co-host\, Jessica\, is going to walk us through a small collection of practices here in a bit. \nFirst\, let’s talk about what makes empathetic listening unique. So\, Jess\, over the years\, we’ve come across a lot of different listening practices. What makes empathetic listening stand out from other ones? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I’m gonna answer that by talking about a different way of listening: active listening\, which is I think what we hear about the most. That’s the skill that most people are familiar with. Active listening means doing the work to really listen to someone’s words and checking with them that you understood the words often by paraphrasing or summarizing what they’ve just said.[00:01:00]\nBut for me\, active listening sometimes felt a little bit limited. I’ve been on the receiving end\, and I think most of us have\, and sometimes it actually even felt a little bit patronizing. Like the person was just repeating my words\, but not really connecting to me or connecting to how I felt. I sometimes didn’t actually even feel heard. \nSo that’s actually what first drew me to the idea of empathetic listening when I first learned about it. If active listening is about repeating content and understanding the words\, empathetic listening is about reflecting the feelings underneath those words. So really seeking to understand someone’s inner world. \nFor example\, active listening often sounds like\, “What I hear you saying is…\,” and then there’s a bit of a rephrasing of the person’s words. And empathetic listening could begin with\, “It sounds like that was frustrating\,” or\, “You sound really excited about that.” \n[00:02:00] So\, one way I’ve seen it framed is that empathetic listening asks us to listen with our heart and mind\, not just our ears and eyes. It’s a step beyond listening to a reply. Empathetic listening really is about listening to truly understand. \nAnd I really want to make a note here that I’m not saying that active listening is not good\, and that empathetic listening is always superior. I’ve really come to actually appreciate active listening as a kind of almost beginner skill that leads toward these deeper levels of listening. So\, you know\, even if it’s basic\, it shows you’re committed to hearing someone. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, that really rings true for me too. Like sometimes just restating the words\, it doesn’t quite go far enough. Especially if we’re dealing with really strong feelings. And I think the next question is\, what exactly is empathy? We talk about it a lot\, but let’s just maybe get a common ground understanding of what that actually means. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that’s a really good question. I’ve seen empathy [00:03:00] described as a skill\, a choice\, and even a quality. But the good news is that anyone can show and practice empathy. So it doesn’t have to be a quality that you naturally possess or anything like that\, but for some people it might come a little bit more naturally to exhibit empathy. \nAnd for others it might take just a little bit more intention. Whether you’re somebody where it feels like it comes a little bit more naturally\, or whether it takes a little more intention and attention\, that’s perfectly fine. \nIn communication research\, empathy is usually broken into two types: Affective empathy\, which is the feelings that we experience in response to another person’s emotions\, and Cognitive empathy\, which is the ability to recognize and understand another person’s emotions. \nAnd empathy is really powerful. Research shows that groups who practice empathy are more supportive\, they communicate better\, and they’re able to work through challenges more effectively. \nAnd interestingly\, empathy is also contagious. [00:04:00] If it’s encouraged in a group or if it’s displayed in a group\, more of the others on the team will display it. I actually didn’t know this\, which is kind of funny because I teach on emotional intelligence\, I really only learned about this when preparing for this episode. \nBut it really does make sense because in emotional intelligence\, we talk about emotional resonance and how our emotions can catch on with those around us. So if we’re all showing a little empathy\, it makes sense that it would grow. \nCORAL OWEN: I didn’t know that either\, so that’s really fascinating. But it really does make sense. And\, okay\, so my next question is\, what are the benefits if we put empathetic listening into practice? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. That’s a great question because empathetic listening is about demonstrating a real willingness to understand. One of the biggest benefits is that it helps us bridge misunderstandings and work through conflicts. It also deepens relationships. \nThink about the [00:05:00] experience of someone really getting you. They check in to confirm if they’re understanding your feelings\, not just your words. If someone was doing that\, if someone was checking in to confirm if they’re understanding the emotion behind the words\, wouldn’t you be more likely to open up or maybe ask about their experience as well? \nSo they’re really seeing you. You might be more likely to say\, “Well\, tell me about\, have you ever experienced this in workplaces?” \nSo let’s get down to\, you know\, what we’re really here to talk about\, right\, in workplaces. Empathetic listening creates conditions where teams can work together more smoothly and communicate openly\, because people know their perspectives are genuinely going to be considered. \nAn important part of this too is that as humans\, we often come into conversations with our own agendas or emotions. We want to be heard\, we want to offer advice\, we want to connect. And empathetic listening helps us pause those [00:06:00] impulses and just be in the conversation\, focusing fully on the other person or people\, and the connection between us. \nCORAL OWEN: That’s a really\, really helpful way to look at it. So now that we’ve unpacked all of that\, could you walk us through how empathetic listening actually works\, step by step? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, of course. So you could think of this as a process or a collection of many practices. Any of these could be practiced on their own or in some sort of succession. So I’ll give you kind of the order that I think they build on each other. But again\, each one of these could be practiced just on their own. \nSo start by reflecting on your patterns\, right? You might even be able to reflect on this as I’m speaking right now: notice how you usually listen. Are you eager to jump in\, share your story or offer solutions right away? Or do you find yourself getting distracted? Or tuning out until something feels [00:07:00] more personally relevant to you? \nHow you listen or how you can tap into knowing how you listen. Think about that. Then ask yourself about your needs or your fears. Is the reason you engage in the listening patterns that you engage in\, because you’re listening to fix\, connect or guide the conversation\, do you have concerns about not being heard\, or do you have concerns about being judged? And maybe that’s why you have the patterns of communication that you have. \nThe third thing is to adopt a learning mindset. This is really about remembering that everyone that you talk to is the expert in their own life\, right? \nSo when someone shares a story about themselves with you\, treat that as a gift and accept it as their true experience. Your job is not to question whether what they’re telling you is right or not. Your job is to get curious about what they’re telling you. \nOkay. Fourth thing is to practice presence. [00:08:00] And this is about paying attention in the moment by putting away devices\, gently bringing your focus back to the speaker. It is really natural. I want to be clear about this. It’s natural for our mind to wander\, but keep returning to the person that you’re in the conversation with or the people that you’re in the conversation with. \nAnd the fifth thing is listen for more than words. Notice body language. Notice energy shifts\, facial expressions or changes in tone. These give clues to the feelings that are beneath the surface\, so that you can comment\, and notice them. And then the sixth thing is to get curious\, what might be driving their words\, which values\, which concerns or experiences might be at play. \n“It sounds like you were very excited about that\,” or\, ‘Wow\, I’m really hearing that you value your family a lot.” So being able to notice those things is really powerful\, [00:09:00] and then ask questions that invite them to share more. “Can you tell me more about that?” “Wow\, it sounds like you really valued your family in that moment.” “Can you tell me more about why you did what you did?” \nYou know\, those kinds of examples really illustrate that ‘getting curious’ piece and lastly\, reflect back those feelings. So say things like\, “It sounds like that was really overwhelming. Did I get that right? Was that overwhelming for you?” \nIf they clarify\, “Actually\, I was more anxious than frustrated or overwhelmed\,” well\, that’s helpful. So be curious about that new feeling\, you know\, and have them tell you a little more about that. \nSo\, I know it was seven mini practices and we sometimes don’t do a roundup of practices because it’s a lot to take in\, but again\, any of those seven can be practiced as an individual practice. So if you just start with reflecting back feelings and trying that out\, that is enough\, right? You don’t have to do all the other things. \nOr [00:10:00] if you just start with trying to get curious about your own patterns of communication and why you react that way\, that’s enough too. You don’t have to practice any of the others. So\, I welcome you to try out one or all of these. When you practice these steps\, even just one or two at a time\, you’ll notice the quality of your conversation start to shift. \nCORAL OWEN: I love all of those\, and I love that they can be sort of an à la carte approach\, Jess. But also you can use them sort of as a framework\, and\, you know\, build that momentum\, and tend the different aspects throughout. And truly\, like even just one step\, such as checking for understanding of someone else’s feelings\, that can by itself make such a big difference. \nAnd I love what you said about treating someone’s story as a gift. That’s such a nice idea and practice too. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And I just wanna be clear too\, as you practice\, just like with all of the practices that we give on this podcast\, these steps become more natural and can [00:11:00] even start to happen in the space of a few seconds\, some of them. \nSo even if it feels strange at first to check in about someone’s emotions\, most people really appreciate the effort and the care. \nCORAL OWEN: I would say that rings true in my experience. So thanks Jess. Always appreciate the practices that you bring. And this one\, as always\, was wonderful. Thanks so much for walking us through empathetic listening. \nAnd for everyone listening\, give even one of these ideas a try in your next conversation and see what happens. \nAnd if you like\, share your experience with us in the Practicing Connection LinkedIn group\, where we explore skills that help us build healthier teams and communities. \nWe’ll be back next week with another wonderful episode and until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/7-small-practices-for-better-converations/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251128T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251128T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251127T110057Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251125T145624Z
UID:10001704-1764316800-1764349200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Finding Gratitude in Tough Moments
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODIzMzAyNiUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgyMzMwMjYtMy1zaW1wbGUtd2F5cy10by1maW5kLWdyYXRpdHVkZS1pbi10b3VnaC1tb21lbnRzLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTgyMzMwMjYlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 48) \nEver find yourself juggling tough projects or caring for others while your own energy dips? \nIn this episode\, discover three practical gratitude habits you can use to find steadiness and clarity – no matter what your day brings. \nThis week on Practicing Connection\, Jessica and Coral move past “feel-good” gratitude to share three real-world practices for professionals dealing with high stress\, teamwork struggles\, or just a long task list. \nWhether you lead teams\, support families\, or show up for your community\, these simple daily habits help you spot what’s sustaining you\, even when appreciation feels out of reach. \nWith flexible options for busy days and tough moods\, you’ll learn how these gentle gratitudes can boost resilience\, spark hope\, and steady you through the hardest times at work and beyond. \nLinks\n\nPracticing Connection episode: “Fuel your Day with Savoring: The ‘Catching Joy’ Practice”\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, and thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection podcast. I’m Jessica. \nCORAL OWEN: And I’m Coral. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And today we’re talking about gratitude\, not as a buzzword or a holiday theme\, but as a real practice. One that can be complicated when life is stressful or uncertain. \nCORAL OWEN: That’s a really good point\, Jessica. Gratitude. I feel like it’s often talked about like it should come so easily\, in those hard moments though. And I just think it’s important to acknowledge that a lot of people are navigating some really difficult spaces right now. Gratitude can feel really far away and when we’re struggling\, like just being told\, “Oh\, just\, just be grateful.” It can sound very – \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: – A daily gratitude practice. \nCORAL OWEN: Oh yeah. Just start\, start in your journal. Although I’m sure it always comes from a well-intentioned space\, it can feel really dismissive. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, yeah. Exactly. So before we go any further\, let’s ground this in a simple definition: [00:01:00] gratitude is the practice of recognizing and appreciating what helps us. What sustains us even when things aren’t easy. \nCORAL OWEN: Precisely\, and again\, this is not about pretending everything is sunshine\, rainbows\, and roses all the time. It’s making room to notice what’s still good\, what’s steady\, and what’s life giving alongside what is also so difficult. It’s kind of like both gratitude and struggle can coexist. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So I noticed that you brought three different gratitude practices today in our notes\, instead of just one. Why three? \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, so this is the party pack of practices\, today. But\, you know\, in all seriousness\, there is no one size fits all way to practice gratitude. Some days we just have the bandwidth for reflection. Other days we’re just trying to make it through. So instead of offering just one structured approach\, we figured sharing three practices that meet y’all\, our listeners\, wherever you are. \nWhether it’s a quick [00:02:00] pause\, a simple reflection\, or a way to study yourself when things feel a little bit overwhelming\, you can just pick and choose what is serving you in the moment that you’re at. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, that is such a great way to frame it\, like giving people options instead of an expectation\, and that I think that you and I have talked about this\, I have trouble with gratitude practice. And I think that’s been hard ’cause it feels like sometimes it feels like a task. \nSometimes it feels like\, when you’re given the advice to start a daily gratitude practice\, I don’t know\, it just feels like an expectation\, somehow. \nCORAL OWEN: Or like another thing on your to-do list. And I think really\, you know\, what the hope is here with the practices that we’re sharing today\, Jess\, is not that this – it should not feel contrived or forced. Just finding something\, just something in whatever practice you may opt to try\, that feels a little bit more fluid and a little bit more aligned with where you’re at. \nAnd so our three practices\, we’ve got the noticing practice\, the one line journal and the [00:03:00] grounding gratitude check-in for you. And I’m excited to unpack all three of these. They build from small moments of awareness into a deeper sense of presence. And you can use them individually\, or you can rotate through them depending on what you need that day. \nWe’re just all about giving y’all tools that you can leverage\, and pick from your toolkit if you will. Whatever meets you in the moment. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, let’s get started with these practices. Coral\, can you share the first one with us? \nCORAL OWEN: The noticing practice: so this one is\, I think\, the most simplistic and it’s usually where I start\, and recommend starting when gratitude feels just a little out of reach. And so at some point in your day\, all you need to do is pause for a moment and look for one\, it can be even a neutral thing or a pleasant thing happening right now. \nMaybe your coffee tastes good. That was mine this morning. Maybe the sun feels warm or\, you know\, just kind of nice and sunshiny through the window. Maybe the song on the radio is hitting just right and has a good vibe. You don’t have to force a feeling. It definitely does not need [00:04:00] to be profound. \nJust the act of noticing what’s around you is enough. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And you know\, this is really similar to an episode we did recently on savoring. And so if you wanna go deeper with this one\, I recommend finding that episode on savoring. We’ll put the link in our show notes. I think that this is a really refreshing take also on gratitude\, right? It’s not about chasing a sense of gratitude\, but it’s about being open to what’s already there. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly\, and the hope is over time\, noticing will help shift your focus from what’s missing to rather include what’s present around you and the things that are quietly supporting you. Even if they’re small and seemingly very minute. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. I love this practice. Let’s move on to the next one\, the one line journal. So tell us a little bit about this one. \nCORAL OWEN: So the second practice is called the One Line Journal\, as you already noted. And again\, it’s very short and approachable\, we [00:05:00] hope\, and it’s just one sentence a day. You can start with the phrase\, “Today I noticed\,” or\, “Today I appreciated.” \nA couple examples: “I noticed how calm it felt driving home without traffic\,” or\, “I appreciate that my neighbor waved when I walked by.” And again\, these don’t need to be big\, monumental things. They can be just these small moments that are happening throughout your day. And the one sentence helps make that act of noticing more tangible. And over time you may start to see patterns\, small moments that help you feel grounded or connected without even realizing it at the time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love that this builds awareness slowly. It’s not about big gratitude lists or journaling every detail. It’s just one little honest line. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly\, and it doesn’t have to come from inside you\, right? It can be things that are happening external to you as well. And I think sometimes if we’re having a tough time finding just that [00:06:00] kind of neutral or\, you know\, somewhat positive connection point in the small day-to-day around us\, it can help bring that vibrance back. \nAnd it’s really about consistency more than volume. Here\, the goal is not to collect all the happy moments\, right? But to recognize the ordinary ones that get us through the day-to-day\, that make life feel a little bit more manageable. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Oh\, I love that. Okay\, now let’s dig into the third one\, the grounding gratitude check-in. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, this is one of my favorites\, truly. And this third practice is for those days when gratitude just feels impossible. And it’s also a little bit of a sensory\, grounding technique. And so\, you know\, if you have spaces where you’re feeling anxious\, overwhelmed\, or just not in that head space\, this is one that I would encourage you to turn to. \nAll you need to do is take a slow\, steady breath anytime that you feel like you need to leverage this. And we’ve got three checkpoints: One thing you can see. You’re naming one thing you can see. Secondly\, [00:07:00] one thing you can touch. And thirdly\, one person\, place or thing that helps you feel supported. \nAnd this brings you back to your body instead of your thoughts\, and it can help your nervous system to calm down a bit. So you can reconnect with that sense of presence. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I love this one. This is an incredibly grounding activity. I remember\, a long time ago\, my friend in a workshop that she and I both taught together\, she would have people kind of rub their thumb and their forefinger together\, or one of the fingers on their hand\, and have them feel like the ridges of their fingerprint\, and just really ground them there. \nAnd I ended up buying her\, and I got myself one too\, I ended up buying her this stone that is intentionally meant for you to like – has like a thumbprint in it. And yeah\, it’s intentionally meant for you to kind of rub your thumb on and get connected to a sensory\, you know\, I guess a sensory moment. So I really appreciate this practice [00:08:00] because it’s not about thinking your way into gratitude\, it’s about finding it through grounding and awareness. \nI think I’ve also seen this in like a one thing. You can see two things. You can touch three things. I’ve seen something similar to this\, but I love how simple this one is. \nCORAL OWEN: Totally. And sometimes the most real form of gratitude\, especially when times are challenging\, is simply noticing that you’re here and you’re breathing and you are not alone. And sometimes that is simply enough. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well that is a beautiful practice. Thank you so much for sharing. I’m really glad you shared three. I think I gave you some crap at the beginning of this\, but I’m really glad you shared three. \nCORAL OWEN: Thanks so much. I really did enjoy pulling these together for today’s episode\, Jessica. So thanks so much for walking through these with me. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, as we wrap up today\, maybe take a moment wherever you are to pause and notice one thing that brings a bit of steadiness or relief. [00:09:00] You don’t have to call it gratitude\, but you might find that’s what it is. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah. And just to reiterate\, gratitude – it doesn’t erase what is hard\, right? But it can soften the edges of when things do feel challenging. And it’s one way to remind ourselves that even in difficult seasons\, there is something that is still holding us. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, thanks so much for this conversation on finding gratitude in tough moments\, Coral. \nIf this resonated with you\, our listeners\, share it with someone who might need that reminder today. \nCORAL OWEN: And we will be back soon with another episode. Until then\, keep practicing. [00:10:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Op and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/finding-gratitude-in-tough-moments/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251120T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251120T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251120T110019Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251114T192551Z
UID:10001703-1763625600-1763658000@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Fuel Your Day with Savoring: The "Catching Joy" Practice
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODE2MzAwMyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgxNjMwMDMtZnVlbC15b3VyLWRheS13aXRoLXNhdm9yaW5nLXRoZS1jYXRjaGluZy1qb3ktcHJhY3RpY2UuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODE2MzAwMyUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 47) \nIs there a way to make positive moments count more? Yes! This episode focuses on savoring\, the active\, intentional effort to prolong and intensify positive feelings. We discuss the science showing how this simple skill directly counteracts compassion fatigue by building your emotional ‘reservoir’ for well-being. You’ll learn: \n\nThe difference between savoring\, mindfulness\, and gratitude.\nThe step-by-step Catching Joy practice for maximizing present enjoyment.\nHow to use reminiscing (savoring the past) as a powerful tool to draw strength and confidence.\n\nLearn how to actively amplify the positive connections and small victories that fuel your vital work in the Military Family Readiness System. \n  \nLinks: \n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/ \nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org \nYale’s Science of Well-Being Class on Coursera\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hey there. Thanks so much for tuning into the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral\, and today’s episode is all about a simple\, yet profound strategy for wellbeing. Savoring. My co-host Jessica is here to guide us. Hey Jess. How are you feeling today? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hey\, Coral. I’m actually feeling really focused and present today\, which is a perfect mindset for this topic. I was kind of just enjoying my second cup of coffee and paying attention to the warmth of the mug. Especially since it’s been getting colder out now\, and also enjoying the rich smell. \nAnd so sort of like a little moment of savoring before we started. And of course once I start digging into something\, I start practicing it like crazy. And so that was a little mini savoring practice that I did. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that. I feel like that’s really a common experience for coffee lovers and tea lovers of course\, too. And it really does highlight how these moments are all around us\, even in the most seemingly [00:01:00] mundane day-to-day experiences. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, exactly. And we’d also love to hear from you\, how have you added moments of savory into your life? You can share your thoughts with us at practicingconnection@oneop.org. \n– break – \nCORAL OWEN: All righty. So before we dive into today’s practice\, Jessica\, can you tell us a little bit more about what inspired you to focus on savoring and how it relates to our work supporting families? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Absolutely. My inspiration for this came from an unexpected place\, taking Yale’s Free Science of Wellbeing class. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of that\, but I took it on Coursera a few years ago after reading about it\, and savoring was actually one of the core modules. And I found it so powerful for grounding myself and for amplifying joy. \nI often practiced it with small things\, like really tasting a meal\, and I think [00:02:00] foods are probably very natural\, right? We think of savoring and we think of food a lot of times. That’s a very natural way to practice it\, but also just watching a gentle snowfall outside my window\, or enjoying the pleasure my dog gets from a good scratch. \nLike really paying attention in that moment\, and just really amplifying that\, and understanding that this is a good moment\, right? \nAnd so the link to our work\, within the Military Family Readiness System\, is all about stress and burnout prevention. The work of supporting others can be tireless\, often managing complex needs and systems. And the evidence shows that savoring is a powerful tool to interrupt the stress cycle. \nStudies consistently demonstrate that intentionally focusing on positive feelings and experiences or savoring them can increase our overall happiness\, can boost positive emotions and even reduce the symptoms of depression. \nSo it shifts our focus from what’s [00:03:00] overwhelming to what is enriching\, even for just a few seconds. \nCORAL OWEN: That is so interesting. It actually kind of sounds like a cousin to the concepts like mindfulness and gratitude\, which I know many of our listeners may already be practicing. Can you clarify or kind of distinguish how savoring is different from these other concepts and practices? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I think that’s an important distinction. And frankly\, any one of these\, doing any one of these things you mentioned like mindfulness\, gratitude\, I think are going to have the effect of boosting your positive emotions. These things can all also work together\, but they are not necessarily the same. \nSo mindfulness is about paying attention to the present moment without judgment. Whether the experience is neutral\, positive or negative\, it’s about awareness. And then gratitude is the focus on the gifts\, contributions\, or good things that have been done for or given to us. Often looking at the source of a positive outcome. \nIt’s kind [00:04:00] of\, past or present focused usually. Awe\, which we just talked about in an episode\, is a specific emotion that recognizes vastness and the connections to the outside world. Like we will realize how small we are\, but how connected we are to whatever it is that we’re recognizing as vast. \nAnd then savoring\, on the other hand\, is specifically about amplifying and prolonging positive emotional experiences. It’s the intentional effort to keep the positive feeling going and to feel it more deeply. So if mindfulness is noticing the positive flavor of a piece of chocolate\, savoring is making the flavor last and really feeling the enjoyment that comes with it. \nIt’s about maximizing the good of the experience. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that. That’s also so helpful to have it broken down like that. Thank you. And it’s so nice to have that concept and have it become [00:05:00] actionable. We’d spend so much time noticing problems that need fixing. I feel like savoring is sort of this deliberate practice of saying like\, “Hold on\, wait. This is good\, and I’m gonna soak it up.” And it’s like a simple tool for making these positive moments\, no matter how small they are\, really count. \nAlrighty\, so here comes the practical bit. Jessica\, can you walk us through step by step how someone can try this in their own life or even in their workday? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, definitely. We’re gonna try an activity that I’m currently calling “Catching Joy.” I’ve tried like three or four different names for this. I’m calling it catching joy right now. So this is a quick and easy practice you can do with almost anything. A sip of tea\, a phone call that went really well\, or even a moment of quiet between tasks. \nSo the first thing you’re going to do: choose your moment. Just stop what you’re doing for a moment and consciously pick something positive that’s [00:06:00] happening right now. It can be tiny\, like a ray of sun coming through the window\, the successful completion of an email or the smell of your lunch. The key is to stop the autopilot and decide I’m going to pay attention to this moment of goodness. \nCORAL OWEN: That pauses everything\, isn’t it? Just creating that space for the moment to simply exist. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Yeah\, it really is. And so what that does then is in step two\, because you’ve taken that pause and decided to pay attention to the moment\, then you can engage all your senses. This is where the depth comes in. Don’t just think about the moment. Experience it fully. If it’s your cup of tea\, then notice the smell\, the temperature on your lips\, the taste as it washes over your tongue. \nIf it’s a positive interaction with a client or with a partner\, notice the sound of their voice\, the feeling of relief or [00:07:00] connection in your chest\, and the sight of their thankfulness. Ask yourself\, “What does my body notice right now?” \nWhatever it is that you’ve chosen to pay attention to\, just ask\, what does my body notice right now? \nAnd then step three: internalize and label the feeling. So as you experience this with your senses\, give the positive emotion a name. Are you feeling joy? Are you feeling contentment? How about satisfaction? Just silently say it to yourself: “I’m feeling a wave of deep satisfaction.” I know that contentment for me comes up a lot when I’m practicing this. \nNaming the feeling helps your brain register it more powerfully as a positive memory and part of your experience. I mentioned earlier that one of the ways I’ve used this is just really savoring a gentle snowfall now. After I’ve done that a few times and really spent the time savoring it\, I actually notice the gentle snowfall [00:08:00] more quickly now\, and I’ll stop for a moment and make sure that I savor those moments. \nAlright\, the last step: extend the experience. This is also called basking. Don’t rush away. Hold the feeling for an extra five to 10 seconds before moving on. We’re not talking about an inordinate amount of time here. Take a deep breath and deliberately allow the positive feeling to spread through your body. \nKind of like soaking up the sun\, you know how the sun feels in the spring. The first time it starts getting a little warm and you go outside and you just put your face up to the sun. So soak up the feeling. By extending it\, you help cement the positive memory and emotional response\, making it easier to recall later. \nCORAL OWEN: That four step catching joy practice\, by the way\, Jess\, I love that name. It’s just so simple and practical for the present moment. I was wondering\, do you have an example of how the principle of savoring can also be used to draw strength from the past?[00:09:00]\nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. That’s a really good question. I really actually struggled when I was looking for a practice I wanted to choose for savoring\, because there’s a lot of different ways you can practice savoring. I’m going to give you an example that highlights how versatile savoring is. \nWe often talk about future coping strategies\, but reminiscing the intentional recall of a positive memory is one of the most powerful ways to savor\, and it’s a form of emotional resilience. It’s like applying the catching joy practice we just went through to a memory\, instead of to the moment that you’re in. \nSo I have a good example that connects to overcoming performance anxiety\, or stage fright. Or public speaking anxiety is another way of putting that\, which most people can relate to. Because we know that public speaking is the most feared activity among people. So I often get extra nervous when I’m doing public speaking [00:10:00] in front of peers\, but I have a memory that I intentionally returned to. \nSeveral years ago\, I participated in a musical improv night during a conference. I cannot sing well\, and I was on stage with people who had many more years of training than I did\, and I was nervous about that. But I did it anyway\, and I ended up absolutely loving the experience. \nTo help with public speaking anxiety\, now I think of that night\, and I remember. I’ll never forget this specifically: taking a moment to look around while I was on stage\, noticing who was there with me\, what the stage looked like\, because I was feeling such a powerful sense of belonging and creativity with the group. That was a moment of present moment savoring\, right? \nSo I took a moment during that performance too. Engage in sort of a\, you know\, four step catching joy activity that we just went through. Now though\, when I’m stressed\, I [00:11:00] reminisce about this. I replay the specific words I sang\, which I’ll never forget either\, right? I can almost feel the stage lights and I can recall the rush of positive feeling. \nIf I can sing terribly in front of a room full of peers and strangers and love every second\, then I can definitely present my work to colleagues. That’s how it helps me. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that so much. That’s such a powerful example\, it’s almost like a savoring memory bake. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, exactly. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, and it just perfectly demonstrates that energy boost that we can get from the catching joy practice. It doesn’t disappear\, right? It gets banked and filed away for later\, and you’re consciously capturing that feeling of connection and confidence in the moment\, and then you can intentionally pull it out whenever you need that boost in the future. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, exactly. I mean\, savoring is about amplifying the signal of the good. Whether it’s the smell of your coffee right [00:12:00] now\, or the sense of accomplishment from a year ago. It all builds your emotional resilience. So here’s a challenge for all of you\, all of our listeners: try the Catching Joy practice just once a day this week or one day this week. \nDon’t wait for a huge event. Just find a positive moment in the mundane: your lunch break\, the first sip of water\, or a successful phone call. And if you’re facing a stressful moment\, try my technique\, savor a positive memory by reliving the sensory details and letting the good feelings wash over you. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that so much. Thanks so much for sharing this practice\, Jessica. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Oh\, I loved it. \nCORAL OWEN: Alrighty\, well that is a wrap for today’s episode. Thank you all so much for joining our conversation today on the power of savoring the moment both in the present\, but also in the past. \nIf you found value in our talk today\, you can share this episode with a friend or a colleague. We will be back next week with something new and until then\, keep practicing. [00:13:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/fuel-your-day-with-savoring-the-catching-joy-practice/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251113T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251113T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251113T110050Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251119T163543Z
UID:10001702-1763020800-1763053200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Reconnecting with Wonder to Spark Creativity
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODE0NjM4MCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgxNDYzODAtcmVjb25uZWN0aW5nLXdpdGgtd29uZGVyLXRvLXNwYXJrLWNyZWF0aXZpdHkuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODE0NjM4MCUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 46) \nWhen the complexity of your work leads to burnout and tunnel vision\, where do you find the energy to create solutions?  \nToday\, we’re exploring the science of awe – that powerful feeling we experience in the presence of something vast. We’ll share simple\, evidence-based practices for weaving micro-moments of wonder into your busiest days\, helping you downshift your nervous system and instantly restore your perspective. \nIn high-stress roles\, we often get stuck in rumination and burnout. This episode explores the restorative power of awe\, the feeling of wonder and humility in the presence of something vast (as defined by Dr. Dacher Keltner). \nWe discuss the science showing how awe reduces cortisol and inflammation\, while significantly boosting creativity and perspective. You’ll learn the three-part practice: \n\nMicro Awe: The daily “Awe Walk” to reset your stress response.\nThe Weekly Deep Dive: Spending extended time in nature to boost creativity by nearly 50%.\nAwe in Community: Using Dr. Keith Tidball’s concept of urgent biophilia to foster shared purpose and resilience.\n\nAwe doesn’t demand more of your time – it asks for your attention. Tune in to learn how to find those moments of wonder and bring new energy to your work supporting military families. \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\n\n\nFinding Awe in the Ordinary | Greater Good Magazine\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica. \nCORAL OWEN: And I’m Coral. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Today we’re exploring something that might sound a little bit magical – \nCORAL OWEN: Aww. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, awww! That’s what I was just saying beforehand. I can’t not do it. So specifically we’re gonna be talking about how cultivating moments of awe in nature can help prevent burnout and reignite creativity. \nCORAL OWEN: This topic is actually one of my favorites\, Jess. I know that we were talking about that a little bit in our pre-show recording. But yeah\, seriously\, we’ve all\, I’m sure we’ve all had those experiences like standing under trees after a rainstorm\, catching the glow of a sunset\, seeing a flock of birds move in unison. \nIt’s those moments where time feels like it just slows down a bit. And these moments of awe are more than beautiful. They’re actually deeply restorative. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And [00:01:00] before we go further\, let’s actually get into what we mean by awe. \nSo psychologist Dr. Dacher Keltner describes it as\, “The feeling we experience in the presence of something vast\, that transcends our current understanding of the world.” \nIt’s that mix of wonder\, humility and curiosity that pulls us out of ourselves and reminds us that there’s more to life than what’s right in front of us. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly\, and just because you’re reading that definition\, it does kind of give the sense that\, “Oh man\, we really need to\, you know\, like be in front of the Grand Canyon or something.” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. Yeah. \nCORAL OWEN: It can also be a lot more micro than that. But we’ll talk about that in a second. But truly\, awe does have this incredible ability\, whether micro or more on the grand scale\, to shift our perspective from me to we\, and remind us that we are part of something bigger. \nAnd that shift in perspective can really [00:02:00] spark creativity\, restore motivation\, and bring us back into alignment with what really matters. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And what’s really interesting to me is that science backs that up\, right? So researchers studying emotions like all people like Dr. Keltner and Florence Williams have found that these experiences help downshift our nervous system. They reduce hormones like cortisol. They lower inflammation. They even ease rumination\, that repetitive like mental loop that we get stuck in when we’re burned out. And that is definitely one area that I need to reduce. \nCORAL OWEN: I think we can all find relativity in that. And truly the best part is\, like we already mentioned\, you don’t have to go to great lengths to find these massive vantage points like the Grand Canyon or the Atlantic Ocean. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Great Lakes too! So\, oh\, you said “great [00:03:00] lengths\,” but I was like\, “Oh\, well I could go to the Great Lakes. That’s only like 45 minutes from where I live.” \nCORAL OWEN: A little more than around the block than us. But yeah\, I mean\, you don’t have to go to the Great Lakes to experience this phenomenon. And according to\, I know a lot of people perhaps have read The Nature Fix\, which is by Florence Williams. Then there’s other research of course from psychologists like Paul Piff\, that even these small daily moments of nature can produce measurable benefits. \nAnd even as small as a dose of just a few minutes\, like noticing a tree outside your window\, or watching the clouds move\, can begin that restorative process. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And when we extend that\, when we spend a little more intentional time outdoors or share those experiences with others\, we not only boost creativity\, but we also deepen community connection\, which is awesome. \nThat’s where the work of Dr. Keith Tidball comes in. [00:04:00] His concept of urgent biophilia highlights how people naturally turn to nature and greening projects during or after stressful times. So planting\, rebuilding\, restoring as a way to heal together. \nCORAL OWEN: Yes. And so today we’re talking about awe as a simple\, accessible tool for resilience and renewal\, and I’ve put together a couple of practices that can bring this to life. \nSo starting with more small personal moments of awe and then deepening it to more of a weekly rhythm\, and finally\, expanding outward to include community. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So let’s get into it then. \nCORAL OWEN: Sounds good\, shall we? So\, let’s start small\, okay? Because awe does not have to take a lot of time. It does not have to be grandiose. These micro practices can be woven into your daily routine\, even on your busiest days\, which I would actually argue\, it matters even more. \nSo one of my favorites is what researchers call an “awe walk.” And this can be a short walk\, five to ten [00:05:00] minutes around your neighborhood\, a local park\, even in your office courtyard. And the goal – yes\, of course exercise is great\, and movement is wonderful\, but that actually is not the primary focus here. It’s your attention. \nAnd as you walk\, look around with curiosity\, what’s one detail you might normally miss? Like the pattern of the leaves against the sky\, the way the light hits the building\, sounds of the birds\, wind. You know\, anything truly\, you just have this act of noticing\, and maybe you might even whisper\, “Wow.” \nAnd when you finish\, just take a slow breath. There is a lot of presence in breath as well. And ask yourself\, “What surprised me just now? Does my body feel different than before?” \nThese small moments of awe help reset our stress response to loose and rigid thinking. And also surprisingly\, perhaps open creative pathways\, which is something that we all need when we’re running on empty. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I really love how simple that is. It doesn’t require scheduling or special equipment\, just a [00:06:00] few intentional minutes to notice what’s already around you. \nCORAL OWEN: Precisely. Awe is everywhere. Just a lot of times we get a little busy and perhaps forget to look for it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hmm. \nCORAL OWEN: So part two\, and this is something that is maybe not as quickly accessible. We would invite you to maybe do this next practice once a week\, once a month\, whatever suits your schedule. Still with regularity\, but perhaps less\, a little bit less frequency than daily. \nDo take a little bit more time to immerse yourself in a setting that evokes wonder. This might be walking along the beach\, going to the Great Lakes\, hiking a favorite trail\, perhaps even star gazing. And again\, the goal here isn’t to do anything in particular\, necessarily. It’s to be with the experience. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I think that that’s a really important distinction here because we’re talking about awe\, but awe isn’t an action. Awe is a [00:07:00] feeling\, right? \nSo you’re\, feeling the awesomeness or the\, you’re feeling the awe right\, and the act and the practice is putting yourself into the mindset or the position to be able to notice what might make you feel that sense of awe. \nCORAL OWEN: A hundred percent. It really is experiencing wonder\, but it’s creating the space. Jessica\, you’re so right. That’s a great distinction. \nSo kind of with that sense of\, “How are we creating the setting to allow awe and wonder to come in.” Some things that may help: leaving your phone behind or putting it on airplane mode. You also give yourself twenty or thirty minutes to explore\, slowly and silently\, and then when something catches your attention. Maybe it’s a sound\, a color\, a scent. Something that fills the senses. \nJust pause. Let it fill your awareness for a few breaths. [00:08:00] And this simple act of attention\, it can expand your sense of space and time. \nIt creates mental spaciousness. Studies do show that extended time in nature boosts creativity by nearly 50%\, which I thought was incredible. Simply by allowing the brain’s default mode network to rest and reset. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That’s really fascinating\, and it really makes sense too. Some of my most creative ideas come after a time outdoors when I’ve really stopped trying to solve a problem. And look\, I live in a city\, and I still consider\, you know\, as I’m taking a walk\, I’m still noticing the nature around me. There’s still nature around. I intentionally walk through\, it’s this tiny little pocket park\, but I intentionally walk through that park. I notice all of the nature around me\, and even after my city walks or whatever\, I still have some of my most creative ideas. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, it’s not uncommon\, Jess at all. [00:09:00] It is really something that when we’re trying to force something\, or just\, you know\, staring at the screen\, you know\, or even pen to paper\, just waiting for something to come along. Sometimes we just need to kind of break out of that groove and just go do something different. \nAnd these moments of awe can really kind of allow that creativity to come back in. And it really does soften the edges of\, “I have to figure this out\,” and lets those insights kind of emerge more naturally. \nAll right\, so something that we alluded to earlier is that having a community element can really just lift this to a whole new level. And Dr. Keith Tidball\, whose research we talked about earlier\, his research on urgent biophilia\, it does show that communities often do turn to nature after disruption or stress. \nIn his work in particular\, after natural disasters such as hurricanes\, et cetera\, and initiatives such as planting trees\, starting gardens\, [00:10:00] cleaning rivers\, awe is a way to restore both the land and the spirit. And when we share awe\, we don’t just restore ourselves\, we also help restore one another. \nSo to move forward with this incredible realization\, as a practice\, here are just a few suggestions that you might try to invite community into your awe practice. You could invite a friend for a sunrise walk or an evening sky watch. I think there are some astronomy clubs\, Jess\, that you – \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I just joined one right before we recorded. I was telling Coral how I just joined an astronomy club and\, it’s pretty nice to not be alone in\, you know\, as alone as I love to be in the quiet of the night sky\, it’s nice to not be alone. \nCORAL OWEN: That sounds really fun actually. A couple other ideas you might share: A “wow” photo or a wonder photo from your week in a group chat or a team [00:11:00] space. \nFor teams that I’ve worked on previously\, we’ve used Slack and\, you know\, I just might be like\, “Hey\, this was for my coffee walk this morning\,” and everybody kind of chimes in with theirs. Kind of fun. \nOther ideas for consideration? Perhaps volunteering at a local park cleanup\, beach cleanup\, community garden or environmental project. And the thought here is that these shared moments build connection\, purpose\, and resilience\, and it really is just such a powerful antidote to burnout’s isolation. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, it’s beautiful how something as simple as noticing nature can ripple outward from calming one person’s nervous system to strengthening a whole community. \nCORAL OWEN: That really is the heart of it. Awe helps us connect with ourself\, but it also connects us to creativity and to one another as well. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Thanks so much for sharing that\, Coral. As we wrap up today\, maybe you’ll find a moment\, even just a few seconds\, to look up at the sky\, feel the [00:12:00] air on your skin\, or notice the color of the leaves where you are. Those small pauses have the power to shift your whole day. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. In awe\, it doesn’t demand more of our time\, like Jess already said. All it’s doing is asking for our attention\, and then in that attention we can often discover a little wonder\, a little spaciousness\, and perhaps even a spark of inspiration we maybe even didn’t know that we’d lost. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, thanks so much for spending part of your day with us here on Practicing Connection. If this conversation resonated with you\, we’d love for you to share it with someone who might need that gentle reminder to step outside and breathe. \nWe will be back next week with another episode. Until then\, keep practicing. [00:13:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Off and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/reconnecting-with-wonder-to-sparl-creativity/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/05/qtq80-kFeWvf.jpeg
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251106T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251106T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251106T110012Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251119T161435Z
UID:10001701-1762416000-1762448400@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Ending the Day Strong: A 5-minute Daily Reset
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODExNjcyOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgxMTY3MjgtZW5kaW5nLXRoZS1kYXktc3Ryb25nLWEtNS1taW51dGUtZGFpbHktcmVzZXQuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODExNjcyOCUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 45) \nFeeling stretched thin?  \nTry this simple 5-minute daily practice to get yourself untangled and take small steps to move out of overwhelm\, help you notice what fuels you\, and set you up for a calmer tomorrow.  \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Coral and Jessica discuss how to combat overwhelm through a quick\, consistent reflection habit. Jessica introduces a five-minute daily practice built around three guiding questions: \n\nWhat was energy-generating today?\nWhat was energy draining?\nAnd what can I do differently tomorrow?\n\nThis small act of awareness – done daily – can help you see patterns\, make gentle adjustments\, and bring focus to what matters most. \nWhether you’re juggling deadlines\, family\, or transitions\, you’ll learn how everyday reflection can restore clarity and control. \nAnd check out this episode from our archives for more perspective on great tracking practices: \n“Energy and engagement tracking\, Nov. 30\, 2023” \nFurther links and resources from this episode: \n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]Hi there. Thanks so much for listening to the Practicing Connection podcast. I’m Coral. My co-host Jessica is here today as well. And we are going to be talking about fighting overwhelm with daily reflections. And Jess is going to be sharing a practice with us. Jessica\, how are you? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF I’m pretty good today. You know what? I can’t complain. It’s still warm-ish outside. The sky is blue against all the beautiful fall colors. The fall rush of activity has calmed down. It seems like September is always such a busy month. This actually kind of feels a little bit like the calm before the storm though\, with the end of the year holidays around the corner. So I’ll share a little bit more about this in a minute. \nBut I just went over my calendar between now\, which is earlier in October as we’re recording this\, and the end of the year. And I started to claim\, like pre-claim\, time on my calendar to block it off way ahead so that I can be prepared when my schedule gets full. And I’m going to stick to it! \nCORAL OWEN Love that for you. No\, I will say the calendar bit\, very relatable. Here in Tampa Bay is\, we’ll call it “Florida Fall.” Like the mercury dipped below 70 the other day. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Like Wisconsin summer? \nCORAL OWEN (01:20.856) \nProbably. And literally the entire neighborhood busted out their like hoodies and beanies and it’s only 69 degrees. So\, but no\, I totally feel you on the calendar bit. I actually began a similar practice about a month ago by grouping similar work into like particular time windows each day. And it really has\, I’ve tried to stick with it\, you know\, like Monday we’re doing this and you know\, Tuesday we’re doing that\, and trying to primarily just keep like for instance calls to the afternoon. \nSo I’ve got a bigger chunk of time in the morning to just move through things and think a little bit more deeply. But it really has helped me stay focused. I’m getting more done\, doing better quality work and thinking. I really just don’t feel so scattered with my energy. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Yeah\, it’s really hard. Context switching is really hard\, like going from one project to a different project where\, you know\, there might be some connective tissue between the two\, but it’s maybe it’s weak connective tissue and it’s a lot of work to kind of do that switching constantly. So that sounds like a really smart strategy. \nCORAL OWEN Absolutely. I know that a lot of people probably can relate to this. Even if you have one role\, oftentimes people will wear many different hats within the same role. So yeah\, maybe we should do another episode about that\, at some point. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF We probably should\, yeah! \nCORAL OWEN (02:42.497) \nWell\, for today\, at least\, we are going to be digging in more about daily reflections. Jess\, can you tell us a little bit more about the practice you chose today and why did you decide to dig into this? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Well\, I mean\, and daily reflections is not new to this podcast\, right? There are so many different ways that you can do daily reflections. And that’s why we cover it so many different ways as well. \nAnd so I’ve been planning out my time\, like I mentioned a little bit ago\, for the rest of the year. And I was struck by just how busy the last two months of the year can get. \nAt work\, you know\, there are project deadlines\, of course. There’s reporting to finish before the end of the year\, many of us have. And it’s often in months that are also packed with travel and important personal commitments. \nMeanwhile\, if you’re in the Northern hemisphere\, like we are\, the days are getting shorter\, which is really annoying\, but that’s another story. All of that can actually combine into making like November and December really\, really hectic\, stressful\, and completely overwhelming. \nHence my going through and pre blocking my time to make sure that I had some. And it’s really hard to know what will help me navigate through all of that. So that’s why. \nCORAL OWEN Yeah\, for sure. There is just so much happening in these periods of time and seasons. What particularly makes a reflection practice helpful in spaces such as these? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (04:12.482) \nThis is the reason why I often suggest reflection practices\, because I know that everyone needs something that’s low commitment and really simple. If you’re overwhelmed\, adding a huge task isn’t going to help. Because I practice daily reflection almost daily\, I’m not perfect\, I know that it doesn’t take long and it’s not a huge task. \nAnd when it comes to this time of year\, toward the end of the calendar year\, it’s not the time to make huge changes or to do deep inventories. To navigate overwhelm when you need something that is incredibly surprisingly achievable. That’s why reflection\, daily reflection helps. \nSo this particular daily reflection is just that. It’s really simple\, takes about five minutes and it invites you to find one small thing that you can change. \nCORAL OWEN That does seem pretty approachable. There is a part of me saying immediately like\, “Well\, if it’s that simple\, how is it actually helpful?” So what would you say in response to that? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Yeah\, I do think that sometimes practices like this can feel overly simple\, and\, “It’s only a few minutes so I can skip it today.” \nHence\, even my own admission that I practice daily reflection almost daily. So it does seem overly simple for such a big issue and for something that can create such a big change. \nI understand why someone might think it wouldn’t be helpful. The power really in this practice is doing it daily. By making it simple\, we make it easier to do every day. So consistency\, because consistency is the key for this practice to have big impacts\, if you do it once\, but never again\, you won’t get the same impact as doing it daily or even weekly. \nAnd by doing it regularly\, then you can start to see patterns. You can test possible next steps. You know\, we can test different things\, and maybe immediately start to see impacts of some of those small changes that you implement. \nIt’s kind of like that\, how a bunch of tiny steps can build up into a big momentum over time. Baby steps\, think\, used to be the term that we would all use\, ‘baby steps.’ \nCORAL OWEN Mm-hmm. Well\, while you were unpacking all of that\, I immediately just thought of brushing your teeth. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Yes\, right! A small daily practice that has big impact on your health. \nCORAL OWEN 100%. So this is yeah\, mental. Mental and energetic and calendar health\, even. So\, and I totally agree that if you’re reflecting over time\, it’ll be easier to notice how your choices are impacting your experience. But having just like a very narrow aperture on say a day\, you probably won’t see much\, but if you expand it outwards a bit more\, a couple of months\, six months\, year\, it probably is a huge shift. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Yeah. And the particular questions that’ll be sharing in a little bit\, I think\, are especially helpful for taking that larger look over time. And I think you’ll see\, you’ll see why in a little bit. \nBut yeah\, exactly. Long-term doing regular reflection kind of gives you those opportunities to have agency and ownership over your own growth. And you know\, when you notice what is going on during your days and you have the opportunity to decide what changes you want to make. \nI think it’s especially helpful in situations where a lot of what you do is dictated by others. Or I would say a lot of what you do sometimes feels like it might be dictated by others\, right? I talked about trying to claim time ahead of time before my schedule gets crazy. \nWell\, guess who allows my schedule to get crazy? It’s really me. I mean\, that’s not always the case\, I know that\, but sometimes it is a very real situation where your schedule is dictated by others. And sometimes it’s a little more of a self-created situation or a perceived situation. \nAnyway\, regardless of what it is\, if you feel stuck or trapped\, it can feel impossible to figure out next steps. And so this reflection can help highlight what changes you’re able to make. And while it isn’t going to magically get rid of the hard things in your life\, it can help you proactively decide how you want to navigate them. And making these deliberate choices can be really empowering. \nCORAL OWEN I love that and it really does sound great. How does one go about implementing this and how does it work? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF All right\, so this reflection is designed for the end of the day. I recommend scheduling just five minutes every day for at least a week. \nMaybe that looks like the end of your workday on your commute home\, or while you brush and floss your teeth. Although if you’re doing it while you brush and floss your teeth\, it’ll be harder for you to write down your thoughts\, but that’s okay. Whatever space you have for pausing to think is absolutely the correct space. \nOnce you reach your reflection\, time and space\, ask yourself these three questions. And I’ll go into a little more detail in a second here. But the three questions are\, what was energy generating today? What was energy draining today? And\, is there anything I want to do differently tomorrow? \nYou might help find it really helpful to jot down a few notes each day to help keep track of what you’re seeing over time. But I would avoid writing more than a short list or one to two sentences per question. It is absolutely imperative that we keep it simple or we’re not going to keep doing this. \nYou can\, if you like\, especially if you’ve chosen brushing your teeth as the time that you’re going to\, that you’re going to reflect\, you can just reflect on these questions and not write them down. The reason we recommend writing them down is because our memories are\, at best\, inconsistent. So in order to see patterns and reap those larger results we were talking about\, just quickly jotting a few thoughts down will be key. And it doesn’t really take much more time than just sitting and reflecting. \nCORAL OWEN Those are great questions and I’m just curious\, not to put you on the spot\, but what might it look like to answer them? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Yeah. Okay. Great. Put me on the spot\, won’t you? \nNo\, of course I came prepared to answer this question. So one general tip is to do your best to approach your answers with curiosity rather than judgment. The first time you do the reflection\, the questions might be hard to answer\, but if you keep answering them consistently\, you’re going to start to look for your answers throughout the day. You’re going to start to notice things more easily. And the reflection itself is going to go more quickly. \nSo here’s a few tips on each of those three questions. So first\, what was energy generating today? When you’re overwhelmed\, it’s easy to miss the good stuff\, but it’s really important to notice what is going well. And this is what will help sustain you throughout the busy seasons. \nYour answers can be something small like\, ‘trading a genuine smile with a stranger at a grocery store\,” or something really big like\, ‘finishing a month’s or year’s long project.’ \nJust try to be specific and honest with yourself about what actually gave you energy. And I think a caveat here is sometimes we might give an answer because we think it should be something that gives us energy. Like I’m going to just use like\, spending time with our kids. \nI don’t have children\, and I’ve said that on here before\, but I think sometimes saying something like\, “spending time with our kids\, or\, ‘finishing that months long project\,’ like we might say something like that because we think it should give us energy\, but I just really want you to reflect on\, was that something that gave you energy? Was that something that just was a lovely release\, but maybe didn’t give you energy? Does that make sense\, Coral? \nCORAL OWEN Yeah\, that totally does make sense. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Okay\, great. I want to make sure\, because I do this kind of practice a lot and I just want people to make sure that they are able to check in really on something that gave them energy versus was just a release. \nAnd if you can’t come up with a single thing that was energy generating\, that’s okay. Just make note of it and move on. So that was what was energy generating today. Now here’s some tips for what was energy draining today. \nI think it’s often easier for us to recognize this one. So this is another question where I encourage you to be specific and honest with yourself. If your instinct is to say “everything\,” that’s actually\, well it’s not being specific for sure. And it’s possibly not being honest with yourself. I think it’s sometimes easier for us to recognize that we felt bad versus recognize why we felt bad today\, right. Or why that was energy draining in this specific case. \nSo try coming up with a list of one to three specific things\, big or small\, that drained your energy\, right? So doing anything with financials drains my energy. I know that. I’ve identified it over the years. If I had to do a whole bunch of travel expense reimbursements or anything to do with finances\, I know that that day\, I’m going to be able to list that very specifically. ‘I had to deal with finances.’ \nAnd again\, if you can’t think of a single thing that was energy draining\, that’s okay. Just ask yourself\, what was overwhelming for me today instead? And still\, if you can’t find an answer to that\, that’s okay. Just note that there was nothing energy draining today. \nIf you find the same thing coming up from day to day\, get curious about it. What about this thing is draining? How can you shift things in your favor\, and who or what can support you? \nIn the case of my issue with dealing with financial tasks\, for me\, what’s draining about it is the sheer level of detail and rules involved and process. You know\, you have to do this before you do that\, and you have to explain this to a great level of detail. And it’s just a lot happening. \nAnd one of the things that helped me shift things in my favor was getting to know\, believe it or not\, getting to know what some of those rules were so that I could do it flawlessly each time I did it. Now it still doesn’t take away the fact that I dislike doing it and that it drains my energy\, but it helps me get through it faster and easier than before. So that’s an example of how that can work. \nSo those were some tips for what was energy draining today. Now the last question is\, is there anything I want to do differently tomorrow? And this is the question where we try to hone in on converting the energy-draining activities into more neutral activities. \nLike I said\, with my financial tasks\, I was able to turn something that was super energy draining into more of the neutral space. It still is energy draining\, but it’s less energy draining than it was before. So this is about turning those activities into more neutral activities\, or adding more energy generating activities into our day. \nSo something might immediately pop up for you when you think about this question\, but sometimes the energy draining things aren’t something we can get rid of\, right? I have to do those financial tasks\, right? I can’t get rid of those. So if that’s the case\, just try asking yourself\, how can I make this easier or kinder for myself? \nThose were tips for the third question\, “Is there anything I want to do differently tomorrow?” You might find it helpful to jot down a few notes each day to help you track what you’re seeing over time. We’ve said that a couple of times. I do think that that is a really helpful way of getting that wider view\, but we really want to keep it simple. \nSo don’t do any more\, as a reminder\, any more than one to two sentences per question. If you notice something specific keeps popping up as energizing\, try to do that more. And then of course\, if you notice something that keeps draining your energy\, and nothing you’ve tried makes a difference\, that’s a sign that you might want to ask someone you trust for help thinking through how to shake things up. Or maybe you don’t need to ask somebody for that. You can just think of other ideas for taking things up. \nCORAL OWEN Delegate it! \nJESSICA BECKENDORF (16:36.142) \nOr if you can delegate\, then by all means delegate. \nCORAL OWEN I say this as I’m teaching my three year old how to load the dryer. Anyway\, that was all in jest. \nNo\, seriously\, Jess\, thank you so much for doing a deeper dive into those questions. Those were wonderful tips that provided a lot of clarity. My tendency would be to hear those questions or read those questions and think through it more high level\, but getting so granular as to the point of ‘a genuine smile from a stranger at a grocery store\,’ those micro moments sometimes really can be a lot more impactful than I think we might give them credit for\, for better or for worse. \nSo\, yeah\, doing that deep dive was really helpful. So thank you so much for this reflection. And yeah\, it kind of feels like maybe like a closing ceremony to your day\, and just really wraps things up nicely and just with a little bit of\, not formality\, but just a little bit of a ritual\, helping you pivot to that next activity\, whatever it is you’re you’re doing from there. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Yeah and you know part of the purpose of that final question is that it can set you up with momentum already for the next day. \nCORAL OWEN (17:49.654) \nOh that’s such a good point. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF Right? Yeah so if decision fatigue is one of the things you struggle with while you’re feeling overwhelmed\, that third question is going to help you get started with your next day. \nCORAL OWEN (18:00.184) \nThat’s a really wonderful point and I love that so much. \nAll right. Well\, that is all for this episode. Thank you all so much for joining us and a special thanks to our co-producer\, Erin Carlson Rivera\, for producing this episode. \nAs always\, if you enjoyed this or any of our episodes\, please be sure to click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or a colleague. We will be back next week with a new episode and until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/ending-the-day-strong-a-5-minute-daily-reset/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/09/AdobeStock_286723164-scaled.jpeg
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DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251030T063000
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CREATED:20251030T100045Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260311T203121Z
UID:10001700-1761805800-1761843600@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Planting Seeds: 3 Minute Connections That Transform Your Relationships
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODA3Mjk3MyUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgwNzI5NzMtcGxhbnRpbmctc2VlZHMtMy1taW51dGUtY29ubmVjdGlvbnMtdGhhdC10cmFuc2Zvcm0teW91ci1yZWxhdGlvbnNoaXBzLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTgwNzI5NzMlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 44) \nWhat if three minutes a day could transform your relationships- and your whole sense of connection?  \nDiscover how tiny\, intentional gestures can spark big ripples across your community. \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Jessica and Coral spotlight the overlooked power of small\, intentional outreach. Inspired by the “3-Minute Rule\,” they explore how three minutes a day spent reaching out – with no agenda -can strengthen bonds\, expand networks\, and boost both appreciation and purpose. \nListeners get actionable steps to make this practice stick\, hear about the ripple effects of genuine connections\, and find out how consistency in small gestures leads to a thriving community – both personally and professionally. \nBonus: Try the “3 for 3” connection habit! \n\nFor the next five days\, spend three minutes each day reaching out to three people: send a quick thank you\, a simple check-in\, or let someone know you’re thinking of them (no agenda\, no ask).\nShare your favorite message (anonymized if needed)\, or a reflection on how this small habit affected you\, in our LinkedIn group.\n\nLet’s plant connection seeds together and inspire others to keep the ripple going! \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica\, and today Coral will share a practice with us about something that might sound small\, but it can have an incredible ripple effect. The simple act of reaching out. We’ll explore how a few intentional minutes each day can strengthen our relationships\, our communities\, and even our sense of purpose. \nHi Coral. How are you? \nCORAL OWEN: Hey Jessica. I’m doing really well\, thanks. I absolutely love this topic because it reminds me that connection doesn’t always have to be a big\, time-consuming effort. It can kind of feel that way sometimes\, but often\, it’s really the smallest gestures that can create some of the deepest impact. Simply a text\, a quick check-in\, or just a short note that says\, “Hey\, just thinking about you.” Doesn’t have to be huge or massive to make a massive impact. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, absolutely. You don’t have to like stand outside their window holding a [00:01:00] boombox above your head. I know it’s a different kind of a declaration\, but anyway\, and I really think that so many of us want to be better about that. We mean to reach out to people. I mean\, I know I do all the time. I think about people I want to reach out to. We mean to reach out to people that we care about or to follow up after a really good conversation. I mean\, hello conferences. \nBut it’s really easy for that intention to get lost in the day-to-day busyness. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, absolutely. I think a lot of us\, I’m actually totally speaking for myself here\, you know\, thinking about connection. It’s like\, “Oh\, I need to call so and so\,” and it’s just like trying to find the time and space to do that big catch up\, it can feel really intimidating. And what we’re going to talk about today is really a way to build that habit into your life in a very simple\, approachable\, doable way. \nAnd it only takes but a few minutes to help you stay genuinely connected. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, let’s talk about it before we get into the actual practice [00:02:00] itself. Why does this matter? \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, so when we talk about practicing connection\, we’re often thinking about how to build and strengthen relationships over time with our colleagues\, friends\, family\, community members. But the catch is the connection. It doesn’t just happen\, right? It takes intention\, even when that action itself is quite small. \nAnd so I like to think of it as\, aptly named: practice for today\, as well as planting seeds. So you might not see anything grow straight away. But each little outreach\, each little moment of care or gratitude\, it really does have the potential to bloom in unexpected ways. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And that\, I mean\, I know that the term ‘planting seeds’ gets used for a lot of things\, but it really is such a beautiful image and in this case\, it really takes the pressure off. You’re not reaching out with an agenda or expecting something back from the person. You’re just tending to your relationships in small but consistent ways. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. And\, this idea really [00:03:00] has been wonderfully captured. If you’re familiar with the entrepreneur\, Jesse Itzler\, he shares this practice in a very similar vein. He calls it the Three Minute Rule and\, put simply\, it’s the practice. That did inspire today’s episode in the large part. But the idea is simply to spend three minutes a day\, and you can certainly modify this too\, to suit your own daily timeline. \nBut as a core practice\, we invite you to just spend three minutes a day reaching out to three people. And the anchor here though is that there’s no ask\, no goal. It’s just a moment of connection. And whether it be a text or a quick note or a voice memo\, which I’m a huge fan of\, bit by bit\, these really tiny\, small gestures\, or seeds\, if you will\, they build a powerful network of really genuine relationships. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I love that. It’s really practical\, but it’s also heart centered\, right? And it’s something you could even say human centered. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And it’s something that we can all do\, you know\, no matter how full our [00:04:00] schedules are. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. Alright\, so let’s just cut to the chase\, and here is how to try it each day. Take three minutes. You can even literally set a timer if that is helpful\, and reach out to three people. It could look like sending a quick thank you to a colleague\, writing a text to a friend you haven’t talked to in a while\, writing a short message or sending a quick voice memo to someone who has made an impact on your life. \nAnd again\, just to reiterate\, the key here is there’s no ask\, there’s no agenda. It’s just connection. And you could even say\, “Hey\, so and so\, no need to reply. I just wanted to let you know X\, Y\, and Z.” It can be as simple as that\, and you know\, truly\, it doesn’t have to be perfect or profound. It’s just this simple\, straightforward note of just thinking of you sharing that small sentiment that can make someone’s day\, and just help keep that relationship alive. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, and the [00:05:00] great thing about this is it’s small enough to actually do. You know\, we all have three minutes somewhere in our day\, even though it sometimes doesn’t feel like it. So like between meetings while the coffee’s brewing\, you know\, before we log off for the day. and I think you and I talked a little bit about this beforehand\, that we can also make this about one person\, right? \nWe could\, you could even just reach out to one person. You don’t have to make it three. It doesn’t have to be perfect like you said. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, absolutely. I’m thinking the car line school pickup. There’s lots of places that we can\, you know\, while we’re in the midst of waiting\, not to fill space with more things\, but I think intentional things that we can slot into those waiting spaces can really add up. And really\, the key here is doing it consistently. \nIt becomes part of your rhythm. And whether it’s three people a day or one person a day\, kind of the cool math here is that if you do the three people a day\, it adds up to over a thousand [00:06:00] connections and touch points for that year. And you know\, not every one of those will lead to something big\, but together collectively\, it forms a web of trust and generosity that strengthens both your personal and your professional relationships. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And it’s not just about the other person\, right? So reaching out like this keeps you in a mindset of appreciation. I would say it reminds you that connection is everywhere\, and it takes just that small little spark to keep it alive. And the more you’re reminding yourself that this is something that’s really important to do\, the more you’re going to notice those moments that you can write about\, or that you can reach out to a person about. \nCORAL OWEN: I think that’s such a really\, that’s a beautiful reflection too\, and that is the beauty of it. You’re not just building your network. You’re building your capacity for gratitude\, for empathy\, for presence and just absolute generosity in showing up for\, yeah\, for the people that you are connected with. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So that’s the practice for this episode. Planting [00:07:00] seeds\, the three minute connection practice. Every day\, set aside three minutes to reach out to three people. No agenda\, just appreciation and connection. You can even tell them\, “No need to get back to me.” \nCORAL OWEN: Mm-hmm. Yeah. And just as a fun bonus\, if you would like to take this a little bit of a step further and really set the habit\, we’ve created a fun\, bonus 30 x 3 challenge. It’s a 30 day tracker to help you get and then keep this habit going. \nAnd it’s just a fun way to visualize the connections that you’re building\, and sort of see your “Garden of Outreach” grow over the month. And we’re going to link a printable version in the show notes for your reference. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Thanks so much for joining us for this episode of Practicing Connection. If you found it helpful\, share with a friend or colleague who might enjoy a simple way to nurture their relationships. \nWe’ll be back next week with another practice. Until then\, keep practicing. [00:08:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/planting-seeds-3-minute-connections-that-transform-your-relationships/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/12/adobestock_1067931833-scaled.jpeg
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DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251023T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251023T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251023T100013Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251208T164350Z
UID:10001638-1761199200-1761238800@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Cultivating an Engaged Attitude
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xODAyNDgzNCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTgwMjQ4MzQtY3VsdGl2YXRpbmctYW4tZW5nYWdlZC1hdHRpdHVkZS5qcyUzRmNvbnRhaW5lcl9pZCUzRGJ1enpzcHJvdXQtcGxheWVyLTE4MDI0ODM0JTI2cGxheWVyJTNEc21hbGwlMjIlMjB0eXBlJTNEJTIydGV4dCUyRmphdmFzY3JpcHQlMjIlMjBjaGFyc2V0JTNEJTIydXRmLTglMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 43) \nHow do teams build real momentum and commitment together?  \nDiscover how small shifts – like rotating leadership and showing authentic presence – can spark engagement and creativity in group projects. \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Coral and Jessica take a real-life approach to cultivating an engaged attitude – essential for building commitment and making group projects thrive. \nThey explore the power of rotating ownership in meetings\, why engagement ebbs and flows for everyone\, and how showing up – whether as a leader or a supporter – fuels stronger teams. \nJessica shares practical strategies to move beyond autopilot\, including rotating facilitation\, intentional participation\, and appreciation. \nTogether\, they reveal how engagement is built day by day\, with honest effort\, small shifts\, and shared leadership. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hey there. Welcome to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral. Today we’ll be talking about cultivating an engaged attitude. It’s a key to building commitment and advancing group projects\, and Jessica is going to be sharing a practice with us. \nJessica\, how’s your week going? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hey Coral. I’m doing pretty well this week. You know\, as I started to think about this topic\, I realized that most of the time I stay on track and maintain good momentum. Kind of chugging along. \nBut like anyone\, there are times when I just don’t feel as engaged\, or I get distracted or I notice that I am participating mostly because it’s what’s expected in that moment. \nI have a feeling that those moments happen for a lot of people\, maybe everyone. And it’s just kind of part of the normal rhythm of work. But I’ve been thinking about it quite a lot this week as I’ve been preparing for this. \nCORAL OWEN: I really\, as always\, appreciate you [00:01:00] sharing that. I think everyone cycles between\, you know\, various levels of focus and autopilot\, and it actually really makes me appreciate those moments when something shifts\, either for myself or someone else\, and suddenly we’re all a little bit more invested again. \nRight? So maybe this is actually kind of one of the more honest ways to begin this conversation about engaged attitudes today. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: By not claiming that we’re engaged all the time. \nCORAL OWEN: All the time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: No. Exactly. I think that part of cultivating an engaged attitude means noticing those moments and kind of getting a little curious about what helps us reconnect\, or even just admitting that\, “Today I’m here because I should be\,” which I know we just talked about this\, right. \nDon’t do things just because you should. But just showing up is okay sometimes\, especially if you notice that like\, “You know what\, today I’m just showing up.” So sometimes starting there is the most authentic choice we can make. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. And as [00:02:00] always\, we do love to extend the invite to you all our listeners to let us know what’s inspiring you. So you can always drop us a note via email at Practicing connection@oneop.org\, we do see and respond to every message\, and we can’t wait to hear from you this week. \n– break – \nAll right. That honesty gives us such a great starting point for today’s conversation. Jess\, let’s learn a little bit more about cultivating an engaged attitude\, and can you tell us a little bit more about the practice you’re gonna be sharing today\, and why you chose it specifically? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, of course. I really wanted to focus on rotating ownership today. Rotating roles more specifically in meetings rather than just kind of asking everyone to be engaged\, and giving tips on how to do that. Although I do have a few tips on that because I’ve noticed that when the groups I’ve worked with switch up who takes the lead\, so whether that’s running a meeting\, guiding a [00:03:00] discussion\, sharing observations and feedback\, running different parts of a project\, it’s a really small but powerful way to get everyone involved at different times. \nAnd so teams with shared leadership roles can see more commitment and more creativity and stronger group bonds because the work isn’t just falling on a few people. \nYou know\, it kind of gives each person a real stake in the group’s progress. And as I’ve noticed myself sometimes\, stepping up or supporting someone else as they step up\, which I think is really important sometimes \,just stepping up or supporting someone is exactly what helps you move out of autopilot and kind of back into engagement. \nAnd like we talked about in the opening\, there are days when you’re not leading and it would be easy to tune out. But in those moments\, engagement might mean\, well\, it might mean showing up\, right? We have those days\, but it might mean also [00:04:00] paying closer attention. Asking a question\, giving genuine shout out to someone who’s trying something new\, or just supporting the person taking on a leadership role by trusting their process and participating fully in it. \nSo rotating ownership I think can help everyone reconnect\, whether you’re upfront or in a support role. \nCORAL OWEN: I love this idea of this practice. So how to actually go about it. Jess\, could you walk us through how a team might try this? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, absolutely. So\, this is two steps with a third optional step. The first step is to actually rotate leadership. So you could rotate leadership for parts of a project\, for meetings\, or even for individual meeting agenda items or roles. But let’s focus on a standing meeting. The easiest way to do this is to set up a schedule and rotate the meeting facilitation\, even if it’s just for a 15 minute standing meeting. \nThe meeting facilitator’s job is going to be to ensure [00:05:00] that you connect to the meeting’s purpose and guide the agenda. Basically\, the meeting facilitator would engage fully with the why and the how of the meeting. Even if all you do is rotate who the meeting facilitator is for your meetings\, it has the potential of having really big benefits. \nAnd a couple of tips: if it’s your turn to be the leader\, you might consider preparing a discussion point\, a reflection prompt\, or just simply checking in with the group on something meaningful. Or\, you might consider asking for feedback. Inviting the quiet voices\, right? That’s a tip for facilitation. \nIf there’s always one or two people who are speaking up\, make sure those who aren’t speaking up as much have some space too\, and make sure to model openness so you could ask others and you could share yourself. “What are your hopes about this project?’ Or\, “What could make our work together smoother?” \nOkay. Step one is really just the rotating leadership. Step two\,. [00:06:00] if it’s not your turn to be the leader\, you’re going to practice presence. If you aren’t leading or facilitating\, you still have ownership over your presence. Again\, sometimes we recognize sometimes just showing up is all you can give that day. \nBut most of the time you’re going to be able to challenge yourself to bring two unique things. First\, maybe a question or reflection. So this means asking an honest question\, sharing maybe a brief observation or appreciation presenting a creative solution or voicing a hope for the team’s process\, even if it’s really tiny. \nAnd then the second thing that you could challenge yourself to bring is genuine appreciation\, right? So this means that you could actively watch and listen for opportunities to celebrate wins\, or share appreciation for something a team member did or said during the meeting or in their recent work. \nAnd if you’re stuck on that\, if you’re like\, “I didn’t hear anything\,” you could start by [00:07:00] acknowledging the person leading\, right? So\, “Thanks for guiding us through this\,” or\, you know\, “I like the angle that you’re bringing\,” or\, “I enjoyed the way you facilitated the reflection.” Whatever that is\, that’s where you could start. \nSo\, challenge yourself to either ask a question or a reflection\, and share a genuine appreciation\, or do both of those things for a bonus. So this step is really about pushing yourself gently to kind of move from passive to present. Sometimes all it takes is a thoughtful comment or a gesture of support to be engaged\, and what those two things are doing\, the rotating of the facilitation role in a meeting and the others who are not facilitating or leading the meeting making a point to be engaged in one of those two ways. It’s really helping to build a culture\, a team\, or a group culture that is engaged. \nOkay\, step three is the optional step. I think it could be really powerful [00:08:00] if you choose to do this\, but I know that not all teams like this would not be something that you would have the time to do always. But if you can do it\, I think it would be awesome. \nSo at the end of the meeting\, take a moment or think through this yourself. How did it feel to lead or to intentionally support the leader? You guys can discuss this\, or you could just think about that. “So how did it feel to lead or to intentionally support the leader?” Did rotating roles nudge you out of autopilot even briefly\, and maybe what new perspectives or creative ideas surface? Did anyone seem more present? \nIt’s okay if engagement doesn’t look or feel dramatic\, just being a little more present\, a little more open can bring momentum over time. \nCORAL OWEN: I just love this\, Jess\, and it really is so flexible depending on what sort of structure and culture your team has. [00:09:00] There’s something that I think every person can take away from this. And it also reminds me of what you shared at the top of today’s episode about sometimes just chugging along until you’re pulled into action. \nThe rotating roles and even just the act of noticing and participation. It just means everyone has moments to be seen. Step up\, even if it looks different each time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, and you know\, because it looks a little different every time\, some really rich discussions and ideas can come out of it that maybe wouldn’t have happened otherwise. \nCORAL OWEN: 100%. So first off\, I do want to say just thank you so much for sharing today’s practice\, and we want to thank all our listeners for joining us for today’s episode as well. If you did enjoy today’s episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or a colleague. \nBe sure to tune back in next week. We’ll have a new episode and a new practice for you. And until then\, you know what it is – keep practicing. \n[00:10:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/cultivating-an-engaged-attitude/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/5-3-e1770154569908.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251016T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251016T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251016T100058Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251016T215409Z
UID:10001637-1760594400-1760634000@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Shifting from “Should” to “Get To” for Renewed Energy at Work
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzk5NTQzOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc5OTU0Mzgtc2hpZnRpbmctZnJvbS1zaG91bGQtdG8tZ2V0LXRvLWZvci1yZW5ld2VkLWVuZXJneS1hdC13b3JrLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTc5OTU0MzglMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 42) \nWhat powers you at work: pressure or purpose? This episode gives you one simple language hack to turn daily obligations into energizing opportunities. \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Jessica and Coral explore the powerful impact of language on motivation and energy at work. \nBuilding on last episode’s Motivation Mapping\, they introduce the “Should-to-Get To” reframe – a simple\, real-time habit that helps replace pressure and obligation with purpose and appreciation. \nCoral shares practical steps to notice “should” statements\, reframe them\, and align daily tasks with intrinsic motivators like growth and service. \nListeners can expect: \n\nactionable advice\nthoughtful reflection questions\, and\nreal-world examples of how language shapes our experience and energizes our workday.\n\nLinks\n\n“Should To-Get To” Worksheet.pdf\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi. Thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica and my co-host Coral is here as well. Today we’re going to be talking about motivation again\, and specifically how the language we use can either drain us or energize us. We’re exploring how shifting from “I should” to\, “I get to” can change the way we approach our professional roles. \nHey Coral\, how are you? \nCORAL OWEN: Hey\, Jessica. I’m doing really well\, thanks. I’m quite excited about this conversation today because it builds on the practice we shared\, I think a couple episodes ago\, about motivation mapping\, and that practice helps us step back and see whether we’re being fueled more by extrinsic motivators like deadlines\, or recognition\, or intrinsic motivators like purpose\, values and things of that nature. \nThe practice we’re talking about today\, it’s like the quick everyday version of that and helps us notice in the moment when we’re running on [00:01:00] shoulds\, and shift our energy to the get to’s. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I always like to say\, don’t should all over yourself is\, well\, I love that it sounds like motivation mapping is the reflection piece\, and this kind of reframe is the habit that you can carry into your daily life. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, 100%. And it is just a really practical\, real-time way to reconnect with that intrinsic motivator\, and it’s just something that you can have in your hip pocket to access on the fly when you need it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Well\, as always\, we’d love to hear from our listeners. Drop us a note at Practicing connection@oneop.org and let us know how you’ve caught yourself saying I should\, and turned it into\, I get to. \n– break – \nLet’s dig into this should to get to reframe. Coral\, can you walk us through what it looks like as a practice?[00:02:00]\nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So even if it sounds a little cliché\, the words that we use with ourselves\, they truly do matter. And when we say “I should\,” or\, “I have to\,” we’re typically operating out of extrinsic motivation. So external expectations\, pressures\, obligations\, and that language makes these tasks. Or can make these tasks feel heavy and draining. \nAnd when we shift to an\, “I want to\,” or\, “I get to\,” we’re reframing the same task in terms of intrinsic motivation. Things like purpose\, meaning\, or growth. And then suddenly like magic\, the task can feel a little bit lighter\, intentional\, or more connected to our values. \nAnd I do want to say\, I don’t want this to come off as like\, you know\, “Oh\, there’s a silver lining in everything\,” because there are some really heavy things or just sort of mundane\, you know\, root things that we move through on a day to day. \nBut really connecting these back to the benefit and the value and the purpose is really where this practice holds its [00:03:00] power. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. What I’m noticing here\, in what you’re saying\, is that it’s not about pretending\, right? It’s not saying\, “I get to\,” instead of “I have to.” It’s not about pretending just to move through your day. It actually is about trying to connect it back to something that matters to you. \nCORAL OWEN: A hundred percent. A hundred percent yes. Thank you for saying that\, Jess. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So\, tell us about the practice. Let’s go through it. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So like I said\, it’s very simple and straightforward. Step one is identifying your shoulds. A great place to start is your to-do list. So\, for instance\, if you’re just getting in touch with this practice at the start of your day\, you can jot down three tasks that are on your to-do list that you’ve been thinking of as shoulds or have tos. \nSo for example\, “I have to answer these emails\,” or\, “I really should prepare for this meeting.” From there\, step two is reframe these shoulds or have to’s with get to\, and you’re going to take each one and rewrite [00:04:00] as I get to\, but tie it back. And this is really the crux of this\, is you’re gonna tie it back to something meaningful\, like one of your key values\, for instance\, or something you enjoy. \nSo a reframe of those two examples from step one would be\, instead of\, “I should answer these emails\,” “I get to support people who are counting on me for my input and expertise.” Instead of\, “I have to prepare for this meeting\,” “I get to help shape decisions and share my expertise and make an impact from there.” \nStep three is just notice a shift\, however slight it may be. So you want to say that reframe vision out loud again. It doesn’t change the task\, but it changes the energy that you’re bringing to it and you’re giving it. \nAnd from there\, step four\, carry it forward. See if you can use this throughout your day and notice when you may catch yourself saying should or have to. \nAnd you know\, just try pausing\, reframing and see how that may change your perspective even in the slightest of [00:05:00] angles. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. I really like how simple that is. It makes me think about a time very recently that I had a big deadline for a presentation I was giving. I kept telling myself\, “Okay\, I have to get this done. I have to get this done. I need to work on this.” And it felt really stressful. If I had kind of reframed it as\, “I get to share important information with my colleagues\, or\, “I get to share about my work with my colleagues because I do a lot of work that my colleagues don’t know about.” \nAnd so\, it was really actually an opportunity for me to share what I’m doing with them. I think it would’ve felt more purposeful. And in the end it did feel perfect\, right? I delivered it and it felt great. But leading up to that was stressful. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, like when you can find and tap into that deeper purpose in the process of the doing of the thing\, when we tend to feel the most stress\, rather than just like you’ve arrived at the finish line. And now we’re like seeing the impact and seeing the purpose and connecting in real time [00:06:00] with all of the buildup. \nThat’s exactly it. That task\, that process\, it didn’t change\, but your relationship to it while you’re still\, you know\, feeling the deadline and feeling the heat maybe a little bit. That’s the thing that changes. \nAnd this ties right back to what we talked about with the motivation mapping episode from a couple weeks ago\, is when you’re stuck in this should orientation or should language\, again\, we’re relying on these extrinsic factors like the deadline or meeting someone else’s expectation sort of parameters. \nAnd again\, yes\, it does work in the short term. It keeps things on track\, but it can drain us and our energy. And when we shift to the get to\, we’re reframing it in the lens and in the orientation of intrinsic motivators like our purpose\, our growth\, alignment with values. And that is just such a renewable\, energetic resource. \nAnd it’s what sustains us when things get hard or feel like a little bit of a slog\, and especially or [00:07:00] more long term. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: You know\, kind of like what we said earlier\, it sounds like the mapping exercise is kind of the bigger picture reflection\, and the should to/get to reframe is the micro practice. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. These truly compliment each other. The mapping can help you see those patterns from a more macro level\, and the reframing is really that real time practice that can help you. In a manner of just a couple seconds\, stay aligned in the moment and tap back into\, you know\, what truly is the purpose and the sustaining force behind all of the efforts. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. Well\, I brought along a couple of questions that our listeners can reflect on as they try the practice. The first one is what’s one should that feels heavy in your work right now? It’s a really great place to start. What feels heavy in your work right now that you’re telling yourself you should do? \nHow could you reframe it into an I get to [00:08:00] that connects with your values? And then finally\, when you make that shift\, what happens to your energy or your sense of motivation? \nCORAL OWEN: I love those questions. Those are so\, again\, just so straightforward. But can really just even in the span of a few minutes\, by pausing on those questions\, it can help shift the entire tone of our day. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That’s the practice for this week. The should to/get to reframe. We’d love to hear what you discover when you try it out. Email us at practicingconnection@oneop.org and share your reflections. \nCORAL OWEN: Also\, if you would like a worksheet to guide this practice\, check out the show notes. We have created a template where you can write your shoulds and reframe them as get to’s. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. Thanks for joining us today. If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app and send it to a friend who might benefit. We’ll be back next week with a new episode. \nUntil then\, keep practicing. \n[00:09:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/shifting-from-should-to-get-to-for-renewed-energy-at-work/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251009T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251009T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251009T100145Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251119T165848Z
UID:10001635-1759989600-1760029200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Take Charge: Small Shifts to Grow Your Autonomy
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzk2MzgzOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc5NjM4MzgtdGFrZS1jaGFyZ2Utc21hbGwtc2hpZnRzLXRvLWdyb3cteW91ci1hdXRvbm9teS5qcyUzRmNvbnRhaW5lcl9pZCUzRGJ1enpzcHJvdXQtcGxheWVyLTE3OTYzODM4JTI2cGxheWVyJTNEc21hbGwlMjIlMjB0eXBlJTNEJTIydGV4dCUyRmphdmFzY3JpcHQlMjIlMjBjaGFyc2V0JTNEJTIydXRmLTglMjIlM0UlM0MlMkZzY3JpcHQlM0U=[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 41) \nIf you’ve ever wanted more ownership in your work or home life\, this episode is for you.  \nWe’ll walk through a quick autonomy audit – a simple way to discover and grow your personal agency\, starting today. \nIn this episode of Practicing Connection\, Coral and Jessica dive into what it means to be a “manager of one” – someone who brings autonomy and ownership to even the smallest daily choices. \nThrough personal stories and research-backed insights\, they break down the Autonomy Audit: a practical\, step-by-step approach for identifying where you can claim just a bit more agency in work\, home\, and life. \nListen in to learn why autonomy matters\, how to spot opportunities for more control\, and ways to experiment with self-management – plus\, an easy challenge you can try this week. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hey there. Thanks so much for tuning into the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral. Today’s episode is all about completing an autonomy audit\, which is a powerful tool for becoming what I like to call a “manager of one.” \nMy cohost\, Jessica\, is here to guide us. Hey Jess. How are you feeling today? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hi Coral. I’m alright. It’s been one of those weeks though. I made this really optimistic plan\, and actually every Monday I start out and I’ll take a look at my calendar\, and I’ll block off time. So this week I blocked off time to do the work. I color-coded my calendar because I’m on different projects\, and so it’s easy for me to then\, at a glance\, see how much time I’m spending on each project. \nI did all of that. But the universe had some surprises for me: extra meetings that were unexpected\, last minute tasks\, a couple of tasks that I forgot about that I needed to deal with\, and really it just felt [00:01:00] like the universe was conspiring against me. \nCORAL OWEN: Oh man\, that is so relatable. Yeah. As a toddler mom and just as a general person rolling through life\, it’s very relatable. But I appreciate your honest\, honest reply for that. Always. Oh man. It totally is like\, “Here’s my plan\, and then life throws in a plot twister.” But I mean\, honestly\, just kinda getting back to the root of today’s theme\, that’s kind of what being a manager of one is all about\, right? \nIt’s finding those little places where we can take charge and shift and pivot so that things work with us the best that we can\, even when it kind of feels a little bit chaotic or even a little bit out of control. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And it’s funny too because I started out feeling totally in charge\, and so those plot twists\, while less interesting than some of my favorite television shows\, they’re incredibly real [00:02:00] life. So yeah\, exactly. That’s\, you know\, when things get out of control\, you can get back to that feeling of at least being a little bit back in control. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, one of my favorite things\, kind of on the side\, I like to do triathlons and stuff like that. But one of the best pieces of advice that my college coach ever gave me was\, he would say\, “The plan is written in pencil\, not in pen.” \nAnd so that approach\, it gives you that approach of like\, “Oh\, okay\, we can\, you know\, erase some stuff and kind of shift and pivot but be flexible\, but still\, like the overall progression is still in a forward direction.” \nSo\, yeah. Applicable in all areas of life apparently. And you know\, I know that there are people listening to this episode as well that are already probably going\, “Oh\, yeah. Very relatable.” And we always love to hear what y’all’s strategies are as well. \nAnd so\, if there are ways that you practice autonomy\, or help get a little bit more of an [00:03:00] ownership feel back in certain places in your life that may feel a little bit out of reach sometimes\, we would love to hear about them. You can drop us an email to practicing connection@oneop.org. and we do check and reply to every message. So thanks for sending those our way. \n– break – \nAll right. Before we dive into today’s practice\, Jess\, can you tell us what inspired you? And I know that you already alluded to this a little bit\, but what inspired you to focus on the autonomy audit and how does it relate? And this is kind of a two part question. How does it relate to becoming a manager of one? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I picked this practice because I’m actually most motivated and fulfilled when I have a little bit of freedom. It’s been like this ever since I can remember. So sometimes that means freedom over my schedule. Sometimes it means freedom over how I choose to tackle problem solving\, or how I prioritize [00:04:00] tasks when I feel trusted to make choices. \nI get a little boost of energy. And that’s kind of what the manager of one mindset is about\, recognizing where we can direct our own work\, even in small ways. And there’s some good science behind it too. There’s\, you know\, studies that show that even a little more autonomy increases our motivation\, our wellbeing\, and our creativity. \nThe autonomy audit is a really simple tool to notice and expand your agency. So when things get overwhelming\, it’s easy to feel boxed in or it’s easy to default to autopilot. But if we can pause and ask like\, “Where do I still have some agency?” That’s being a manager of one. Those small moments of ownership can really boost our engagement and satisfaction and help us spring into action. \nAnd modeling this on a team has a ripple effect too\, right? It has a [00:05:00] positive effect on everyone around you. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. I’m just reflecting on scenarios\, you know\, working in teams and whatnot\, and where this has cropped up in just notable instances. And it does have that contagious energy\, like in a positive way\, and can help give everybody a boost around you. So I can’t wait to dig into this. And so yeah\, for the practical bit\, can you walk us through step by step how someone might try this? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, definitely. If you’re listening and you want to join in\, you can grab a notebook\, or open up your notes app or you could just follow along mentally. \nSo the first step is listing your responsibilities. You might even already have a project list somewhere\, but this is about writing down your main responsibilities. \nSo start with the big picture\, like work\, home\, volunteering or personal projects\, but don’t stop there. Under each of those major headings\, list out a few specific projects or tasks that you’re currently working on. \nFor example\, in the work [00:06:00] category\, maybe you have a client presentation or a regular team meeting and updating a report\, right? Maybe you’ve got those three projects. \nAt home\, it might be planning meals\, organizing the garage\, or helping kids with homework. Breaking it down this way can give you a clearer view of where your autonomy might vary from project to project\, and you can also just look at one of these big buckets of responsibilities\, right? \nYou don’t have to write them all down and put projects under each one of them and do this activity with all of those projects. So you can just take a look at one of those big buckets of responsibilities\, like only look at your work projects or your home projects for this activity. So list your responsibilities. \nCORAL OWEN: That’s such a great point\, and I could see how this could easily kind of get overwhelming. And so I would\, yeah\, just focus on one specific area where you’re maybe feeling a little bit stuck\, or low energy. I think it sounds like a great place to start. \n[00:07:00] So where does it go from there? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yep. So after you’ve listed some areas of responsibility\, then you’re going to go through and rate your autonomy. \nSo to do that\, there’s a set of three questions that you can\, if you want to\, you can journal on them or you can just do a gut check and think about them. \nSo the first question is\, “How much control do I actually have here? \nThe next question is\, “Am I steering or am I mostly following directions?” \nAnd then the third question is\, “Is there an area I wish I had more say or flexibility?” \nAnd after considering those questions\, give each responsibility an autonomy rating\, high\, medium\, or low. You don’t have to spend a lot of time on this. \nLike I said\, you can let your gut be your guide because you can always go back and dig a little [00:08:00] deeper. You’re really looking for how much control you feel like you have right now\, so that you can assess whether there are any immediate wins you can get. \nAnd then the third step is\, choose a responsibility with a medium or low autonomy. And brainstorm ways that you can get a little bit more influence. So\, you could brainstorm a couple of tweaks to boost your sense of ownership for that responsibility. For example\, can you propose a new way of doing the task? Can you switch up your routine for one that you would prefer? Or could you take a low risk action on your own instead of waiting for approval? \nSo pick one tweak and try it this week. I didn’t mean for that to rhyme. Think of it as a micro-experiment afterwards. Then you can notice\, did you feel more engaged\, energized\, or confident? \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, like a little bit of a pilot test. I like that. Jess\, do you have [00:09:00] any examples of how you’ve done this in your own personal life? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I do. So prepping for this episode actually got me thinking about a project where I was stuck and I was waiting for feedback that never came. And it was kind of a sticky situation because our team was trying to move forward on something\, and everyone was so busy\, right? And I asked for feedback and it was really difficult to get it. \nSo I actually ended up sketching out my own plan\, and then I shared that with my team. It felt really risky because I like to be more collaborative than that\, right? And in my head\, I was not being collaborative by doing this thing on my own. \nBut actually\, it turned out that it actually got things moving. People had something to react to. They actually appreciated having a starting point. And then they could build on my ideas. And so that’s when I realized that I was actually practicing being a manager of one. So I was [00:10:00] taking that initiative\, not waiting for permission and just making the first move. \nCORAL OWEN: That’s a great example\, and there’s so much to be said for creating your own momentum\, it can kind of have like a snowball effect too in a positive direction. I love that example so much. It’s a lot of momentum and confidence\, not just for you\, but also for your team as well. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, exactly. So here’s our challenge: if you’re listening\, try an autonomy audit and take a small intentional step toward becoming a manager of one\, and then notice what shifts for you. \nDo you have a little more energy or engagement\, or maybe a creative spark that kind of came out of nowhere? \nWhether it works perfectly or surprises you\, or it turns into a learning moment\, share your story with us. We’d love to learn from your experience. \nCORAL OWEN: Well\, this was a great one for sure. And this is a wrap for today’s episode. \nThanks Jess so much for sharing this practice with us\, and thank you all for joining our conversation today on [00:11:00] becoming a manager of one. \nIf you found value in our conversation today\, please share this episode with a friend\, and we’ll be back next week with something new. \nUntil then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/take-charge-small-shifts-to-grow-your-autonomy/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/AdobeStock_269002913-scaled.jpeg
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20251002T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20251002T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20251002T100133Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251002T204613Z
UID:10001634-1759392000-1759424400@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Motivation Mapping: Leading with Purpose
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzkxMjI3MSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc5MTIyNzEtbW90aXZhdGlvbi1tYXBwaW5nLWxlYWRpbmctd2l0aC1wdXJwb3NlLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTc5MTIyNzElMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 40) \nWhen was the last time work truly energized you?  \nToday\, discover how to pinpoint what’s fueling you and learn practical ways to reconnect with your deepest motivators – so your work supports both your goals and your values. \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Jessica and Coral reveal how you can use the Motivation Mapping tool to transform your work from simply meeting deadlines to leading with energized purpose. \nThrough a reflective\, step-by-step practice\, you’ll learn how to distinguish between intrinsic and extrinsic motivators\, notice your own balance\, and make small shifts that lead to long-term fulfillment and renewed drive. \nWhether leading a team or taking on a new project\, this process helps transform routine into meaning. \nTry Motivation Mapping for a current project: \n\nGrab the Motivation Mapping Worksheet\nIn one sentence\, share an intrinsic motivator that makes the work meaningful to you right now.\nThen\, post one small action you’ll take to better connect this project to your values this week.\n\nShare your insight with our LinkedIn group—let’s celebrate purposeful leadership and inspire each other with new ideas! \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica\, \nCORAL OWEN: And I am Coral. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And today we’re going to be talking about motivations\, specifically\, how to better understand what fuels us as leaders. And how to align our work with what matters most. Coral\, how are you? \nCORAL OWEN: Hey\, I’m doing great Jess. Thank you. This topic has been on my mind a lot recently\, to be quite honest. And so\, you know\, so often in leadership we hit stretches where we feel drained or disconnected and we wonder why. And sometimes it’s because we’re leaning heavily on external motivators\, like deadlines\, recognition\, pressure\, general routine. \nAnd none of these are inherently bad\, by the way\, just as a side note\, but those internal drivers that really sustain us and connect us to the work\, they can kind of get lost in the doing of the thing\, if you will. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Mm-hmm. Yeah\, that really resonates with me. I’ve noticed that when I’m motivated by things like [00:01:00] learning growth or connection\, I feel energized even when the work is really challenging. But if I’m only driven by a deadline or not trying to let someone down\, I can feel depleted pretty quickly and burned out. \nI mean\, I know depleted kind of means burned out\, but I mean\, burned out\, like I think a step beyond depleted even. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, exactly. And this is where today’s practice of motivation mapping comes in. It’s a practice that helps us pause and really take a look at the mix of motivators that are in play. \nAnd so\, extrinsic\, intrinsic\, we’ll get into those in just a second. And once we see sort of how everything is comprised\, we can make small shifts to reconnect with our work with our values\, and strengthen our intrinsic motivation to better sustain our energy. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: All right. This is very intriguing. Coral\, can you share a little more about what motivation mapping is and why you selected it? \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So motivation mapping is a tool for taking [00:02:00] stock of what’s driving you in a given project or area of responsibility. You can think of it like checking the fuel mix in your tank. \nAre you running mostly on extrinsic motivators\, like external rewards\, deadlines\, recognition\, or are you primarily fueled by intrinsic motivators\, things like purpose\, growth\, alignment\, learning\, like you said\, Jess\, that are really\, centered with your value sets. \nAnd like we just mentioned\, neither type of motivation is inherently better than the other. Extrinsic motivators keep us accountable and on track. But if they’re the only thing driving us\, like you already alluded to\, Jess\, we tend to burn out. \nIntrinsic motivators\, on the other hand\, are renewable. They sustain us through setbacks because the work itself becomes meaningful. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hmm. Yeah\, this is fascinating. I remember reading a book a while back where they talked about one extrinsic motivator\, which was salary\, for example. You know\, an external reward for work done. \nAnd one of the things that they mentioned was [00:03:00] that the research shows that when you get to a certain amount\, that becomes less of a factor and that you need to focus on internal motivators. \nBut what I saw happening with that was people grabbing onto the\, “Oh\, people only need to make this much money\, and then we need to do the internal motivators.” And I think that it’s more nuanced than that. And so I’m excited for this activity. \nCORAL OWEN: So\, yeah\, that’s a wonderful example\, by the way\, Jessica. So here’s how you can try motivation mapping yourself. \nStep one. Pick a focus area. So you’re not going to tackle your entire portfolio\, okay? Just choose one project\, task\, or responsibility that you’re working on right now. \nFor example\, it might be leading a new initiative at work\, preparing a presentation\, bookkeeping\, managing a big transition for your team. \nStep two\, you’re going to list your motivators. You can draw two columns on a page\, one for intrinsic and one for extrinsic. [00:04:00] For the intrinsic column\, write the motivators that come within things like\, “I care about impact\, I’m learning new skills\, this connects with my internal values.” \nThe extrinsic column\, jot down the external drivers. “There’s a deadline. Getting a great salary from this. My team or boss expects us. I’ll be evaluated. People are depending on me.” Things of that nature. \nStep three – there’s only four steps by the way – step three is you’re going to just take notice of the balance. Not judge it. Just notice it. \nSo look at your list and circle of motivators that feel really strong right now. They’re kind of primary ones. Do they fall all in one column? And what does that tell you? This reflection piece about your current experience of this work\, is it primarily externally dominated or internally? \nThen step four\, if you notice that you’re running mostly on extrinsic motivators\, ask yourself\, “How can I reconnect this task with something that feels intrinsically meaningful to me?” \nFor example\, if you’re [00:05:00] writing a report\, mainly because it’s due and that can\, you know\, kind of grind the gears a little bit sometimes\, try reframing it as perhaps a chance to highlight your team’s contributions or clarify a bigger vision\, something along those lines\, and that shift\, it taps into purpose. \nWhich is far more sustaining\, and it really can give us a bigger\, broader context about the impact of what’s going on. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Wow. I really like how practical this is. You know\, sometimes we don’t realize we’re running on fumes until we stop and look at what’s fueling us. And I can attest to this. I often don’t realize that I’m running on fumes until I’m forced to stop and look at what’s fueling me. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. And you know\, for our listeners\, having a few additional reflection questions as you try to map out your motivation may help anger you. So here are a few that we might suggest. \n“When was the last time you truly felt energized in your work? What values were being honored in those moments?” [00:06:00]\nAnother one: “Looking at your current responsibilities\, where are you noticing a potential imbalance in your motivators?” \nAnd then a third to kind of bring this home: “What’s one small way that you can reconnect to your values in that area this week?” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, those are awesome prompts. You know\, even taking five minutes to think them through could shift how you approach. I mean\, I think we’re often sharing prompts like this\, these kind of big questions and it feels it could feel really big. \nDon’t let that scare you. Just look at the question and let your mind do the work and just spend a few minutes thinking through them and that could shift how you approach your work. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. And again\, this shift doesn’t have to be big. Sometimes it’s not even a fundamental shift of how we’re working. It’s just a matter of shifting perspective\, and even these small reframes can reconnect us to our deeper motivation. \nMaybe instead of\, “I have to get this done\,” you think\, “This is gonna help create a better experience for the people that I’m [00:07:00] serving.” \nAnd that little alignment with values can change the entire energy that you’re bringing to the work and to your day. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, and you know\, it seems like this is something that leaders could use with their teams too. So like asking your team\, “What’s motivating us about this project?” Or asking a group\, right? \nIf you’re working on a coalition with others\, ask yourselves\, “What’s motivating us about this project?” \nThat could really spark a conversation that helps the people that are involved in that team or that group feel more connected\, and less like they’re just going through the motions or they’re just coming together\, choosing a task\, and then going and doing the task\, right. \nCORAL OWEN: I absolutely love that. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well. Awesome. Thanks so much Coral for sharing this. \nThat’s it for today’s practice on motivation mapping. We’d love to hear what you discover when you try it. You can email us at practicing connection@oneop.org and share your reflections. \nCORAL OWEN: Also a little bit of a [00:08:00] bonus freebie for this episode. \nIf you would like a worksheet to walk through this practice step by step along with the reflection questions as well\, just check the show notes for this episode and we have a downloadable template that you can use. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Thanks again for joining us today. If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app and send it to a colleague or a friend who might benefit. We’ll be back next week with a fresh episode. \nUntil then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/motivation-mapping-leading-with-purpose/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250925T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250925T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250925T100041Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251119T170029Z
UID:10001627-1758787200-1758819600@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Scaling Your Skills: Feedback & Mentorship That Works
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzg4NDEzNCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc4ODQxMzQtc2NhbGluZy15b3VyLXNraWxscy1mZWVkYmFjay1tZW50b3JzaGlwLXRoYXQtd29ya3MuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzg4NDEzNCUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 39) \nFeedback and mentorship aren’t just buzzwords – they’re the shortcuts to better skills\, stronger confidence\, and real momentum.  \nDiscover a simple\, practical approach that makes getting feedback and finding a mentor less intimidating – and highly actionable! \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Jessica and Coral dig into the roles of feedback and mentorship in professional growth. Coral shares a step-by-step method that makes seeking input approachable and turns it into real progress. \nLearn how to choose the right people to ask\, reflect on what you hear\, and take small\, sustainable actions. \nPlus\, find out how to invite mentorship into your journey – even if you don’t have a formal mentor. Perfect for anyone who wants to develop new skills\, boost confidence\, and foster authentic connections at work. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\nOneOp Academy is a free online series designed for anyone interested in positive change\, whether you’re an educator\, community leader\, student\, or just passionate about supporting families. \nThis year’s Academy spotlights the unique challenges facing military connected youth\, from mental health to resilience education to community support. \nExplore the 2025 OneOp Academy and register today at oneop.org/series/2025academy[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi. Thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica and my co-host Coral is here as well. Today we’re going to be talking about feedback and mentorship for skill growth\, and Coral’s going to be sharing a practice with us. Hi Coral. How are you? \nCORAL OWEN: Hey Jess. I’m doing well. Yeah\, as I was preparing for this week’s episode\, I was reflecting really heavily on the role that mentorship has played in my own professional experience\, particularly most recently in scaling a business. \nAnd it’s only been after several years of flying solo before I finally realized that I could save myself so much heartache and also have such a greater impact if I had sought support from a mentor\, which is\, you know\, I’m a couple years deep into a very formalized\, coaching and mentorship program\, which is\, it’s been wonderful. But it took me a while to get there and yeah\, I just\, wow\, it’s made such a difference. \nBut it can be tough to ask for that level of support. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Yeah. [00:01:00] I love that perspective. It really does take courage to ask for feedback directly. I’ve been involved in several training and coaching programs\, a big part of the program involved obtaining feedback. And\, you know\, it’s often helped me make changes\, which a lot of people would expect\, right? \nWhen you’re getting feedback\, a lot of people feel like\, “Oh\, well that’s about\, you know\, changing and getting better.” I would say for me\, even more so\, it’s helped me see strengths that I have that I didn’t notice. Other people knew\, other people could see it\, but I didn’t notice them until someone started to point them out to me. \nCORAL OWEN: I love that and that’s such a perspective shift I had as well of help other people who are seeing us doing the thing or cultivating the skill or process\, or whatever it is that we’re looking to elevate and hone\, and they can often see things from\, well\, they are seeing it from a different perspective and helping us lean into the things that we’re strong in. And further hone [00:02:00] those pieces\, help level up the things. \nAnd then\, you know\, maybe shift\, pivot a little bit and we’re actually getting into that today. But\, yeah\, a lot of people just think that they’re\, “Oh\, feedback.” Like\, “I don’t wanna ask people how\, you know – ” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: – “Like I already know\, I’m already\, I’m so hard on myself. I already know how terrible I am. I don’t need anyone else to point it out!” \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah. So this is definitely a different framework for perspective that is not just like\, “Hey\, you could really use some work on X\, Y\, and Z.” \nIt’s about that really holistic perspective of receiving feedback or even developing a more formalized mentorship relationship\, if you so desired. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, before we move on\, I’ll just quickly give a little bonus exercise here. One of the best questions that I was asked\, when I was trying to get feedback in one of these programs was\, they told me to ask\, “When I walk into a room\, what shows up when I do?” And people gave me feedback on that\, and that was pretty interesting. \n[00:03:00] It was pretty cool. But let’s learn more about feedback and mentorship for skill growth\, Coral. Tell us a little bit about the practice that you’re going to be sharing today and why you chose it. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, absolutely. So\, much of professional development really happens outside of these formal trainings and courses and conferences that we\, you know\, do attend from time to time. But once you decide that\, you want to keep growing a skill or seeking it out and cultivating\, that the real work is in weaving it into your day to day\, not just in that\, you know\, kind of finite space that we’re learning about it or you know\, kind of developing that brain awareness of it. \nAnd so feedback and mentorship are two of the most effective ways to do that. They give us outside perspective\, accountability\, encouragement. But also as we already noted\, asking for feedback or arranging mentorship\, it can feel intimidating. It can also\, could just feel like\, I hate to say that like a burden\, you know\, just kind of a heavier load to add to both our plate\, but also to ask someone else who already is so busy [00:04:00] to take on that\, level of guidance and mentorship. \nAnd so I wanted to share a really simple structured practice that makes it very attainable\, very easy to access\, and hopefully just something that is a very\, approachable way to go about this. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well that sounds super useful. Let’s walk through the practice. \nCORAL OWEN: Sure thing. So here’s a practice that you can try next time. You want to develop a skill more deeply in your place or professional space. The first step is of course\, choosing the right person. So think about someone who you have seen applying the skill\, or who interacts with you in the context where you’re trying to grow. \nAnd it doesn’t have to be a supervisor. It can be a peer\, a colleague\, even someone that you support. And sometimes the end user perspective is actually the most helpful. So from there\, once you’ve settled on this person\, step two is\, or perhaps a little bit in tandem\, using a simple framework in asking for feedback and one that I have leveraged in the past. \n[00:05:00] Jess\, I think\, you know\, in kind of our pre-show conversation\, you mentioned that you’ve used this before\, with a slightly different spin. I’ve come to call it start\, stop\, continue. Here’s how it works. Just very straightforward. So this is asking\, “What’s something new that I could start doing that would help me use the skill more effectively\,” or something of the sort\, right. \nNumber two here\, stop. You can ask what is\, and this is\, you know\, the question that you’re asking of this person who is helping you along in this process\, you can ask them\, “What is one thing I’m doing right now that might be getting in the way of progress?” \nAnd then thirdly\, continue to ask\, “What am I already doing well that I should keep doing?” \nSo the reason I love this framework so specifically is that it makes feedback concrete and balanced. And you’re not just hearing what needs fixing\, you’re also hearing what’s already working\, which is really important for motivation\, but also just for that holistic [00:06:00] perspective like we talked about. \nAll right\, so step three is reflecting and acting. Once you’ve gathered this feedback and had that input from your mentor\, from your experience: write it down\, look for patterns\, and then choose one small doable action to try straight away. we actually talked about this in our prior episode last week about those just like bite-sized nugget actions that you can do\, rather than trying to\, you know\, just change everything straight away\, just choose one thing in a very specific context and just try that in a very\, minute sense. \nDon’t try to change everything at once. It can get a little overwhelming sometimes. So that’s just the very ground floor asking for feedback\, and it can be\, you know\, multiple times over\, or kind of a continuing sequence. \nIt can also just be a one-off\, like\, “Hey\, you know\, can we watch me do this thing\, and let me know what should I start doing? What should I stop and what should I continue?” \nIf you have something [00:07:00] that is a little bit meatier in nature\, or that may take more continual progress\, you know\, more of a long term\, you may want to explore mentorship\, and a mentor does not have to be a formal role. It can be someone who’s a step or two ahead of you and the skill you’re developing. And when you’re reaching out you might say\, “I’m working on developing this skill and I really admire how you approach it. Would you be open to occasional check-ins or giving some advice as I keep practicing?” \nAnd by and large most people will simply be flattered that you asked and oftentimes are happy to share their experience. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I mean\, like you said\, Coral\, in our pre-conversation\, before we started recording\, I love the start\, stop\, continue framework. I’ve used it with groups in a totally different angle. It really does though in this context\, it makes feedback less overwhelming for both the person asking and the person giving it. \nCORAL OWEN: A hundred percent it\, it just lowers the [00:08:00] barrier\, right? And so instead of\, “Hey\, can you give me some feedback?”\, that can feel really huge both to you and to the person that you are liaising with. And instead being very specific and giving three small buckets that that person who’s advising or supporting you can fill\, just\, yeah\, it’s a lot more straightforward and specific and just clear. \nThere’s clarity around it. And the mentorship element\, if you choose to dig in a little bit deeper\, it builds on that and you can still continue using that start\, stop\, continue framework. And it just gives you that ongoing perspective and encouragement as you integrate your new skill into your daily work. \nContinue to hone whatever practice it is that you’re cultivating and leveling up what you’re doing. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. Well\, that is it for this episode. Thanks so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to send it to a friend who might benefit. We’ll be back next week with a new episode. Until then\, keep practicing. [00:09:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/scaling-your-skills-feedback-mentorship-that-works/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/10/12957118165_e0a5b1251d_k.jpg
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250918T060100
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250918T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250918T100124Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20250929T140117Z
UID:10001625-1758175260-1758214800@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Don't Keep It to Yourself! Creating a Culture of Shared Learning
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzg1NTg3NSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc4NTU4NzUtZG9uLXQta2VlcC1pdC10by15b3Vyc2VsZi1jcmVhdGluZy1hLWN1bHR1cmUtb2Ytc2hhcmVkLWxlYXJuaW5nLmpzJTNGY29udGFpbmVyX2lkJTNEYnV6enNwcm91dC1wbGF5ZXItMTc4NTU4NzUlMjZwbGF5ZXIlM0RzbWFsbCUyMiUyMHR5cGUlM0QlMjJ0ZXh0JTJGamF2YXNjcmlwdCUyMiUyMGNoYXJzZXQlM0QlMjJ1dGYtOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRnNjcmlwdCUzRQ==[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 38) \nWhat if the fastest way to master any skill was to teach it to someone else?  \nThis episode reveals how sharing your learning not only helps others – it solidifies your own growth\, strengthens your team\, and can transform your workplace culture. \nAre you holding on to valuable insights\, or passing them along? In this special round-up episode\, Jessica and Coral explore why teaching others is the secret weapon for growth. \nInstead of just one practice\, you’ll get a toolkit of real-world ways to share what you’re learning\, from quick tips to full team huddles. \nListen in to discover how knowledge sharing deepens your understanding\, boosts your confidence\, and creates a ripple effect far beyond your own desk. \nWhether you’re a seasoned leader or just starting out\, you’ll walk away ready to build a culture of curiosity\, generosity\, and ongoing development. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\nOneOp Academy is a free online series designed for anyone interested in positive change\, whether you’re an educator\, community leader\, student\, or just passionate about supporting families. \nThis year’s Academy spotlights the unique challenges facing military connected youth\, from mental health to resilience education to community support. \nExplore the 2025 OneOp Academy and register today at oneop.org/series/2025academy[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hi everyone. Welcome to this episode of Practicing Connection. I am Coral and I’m here with my co-host\, Jessica\, and today we’re diving into something a little different\, but super essential\, which is how to share what you’ve learned with others. Hey\, Jessica\, how’s your week going? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hey\, Coral. I’m good. Honestly\, this theme has been on my mind a lot. There’s something about wrapping up a learning journey and then turning around to share it that just feels right to me. But I also work in the education field\, so I guess that makes sense. I might be a little biased. \nCORAL OWEN: That does track. I love that though\, yeah. Any personal stories or moments from this week where you just found yourself wanting to shout\, like\, “I learned this\, everyone needs to know!”? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yes. As a matter of fact I’m in a systems thinking class right now\, and we have been talking about VMCL\, which stands for Vision\, Mission\, Capacities and Learning. I just finished the [00:01:00] portion that discusses developing your learning systems\, these are the systems of feedback that you set up to continually learn from. \nAnd the systems you set up so that your team can make the most of their professional development by sharing what they learn with others on the team. So\, super relevant to today’s topics\, and I do feel like I have to note that the class and the podcast converging at the same time was not planned. \nCORAL OWEN: But a very happy accident\, I think\, as Bob Ross would say. But yeah\, V-M-C-L\, that’s a new one for me. But I am so excited to dig into this more. And it is such a nice feeling when things align like that\, isn’t it? \nSo I know in previous episodes we typically zero in on like one practice specifically for our listeners to try\, but I was thinking maybe we shake things up a little bit. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, and there’s actually a pretty fascinating reason behind it. Studies show that when you teach others\, you [00:02:00] invest more effort\, you spend more time on the material and you achieve better outcomes\, even if your student is just a digital teachable agent. It’s called a protege effect. And this protege effect happens because teaching requires you to organize your thoughts to identify gaps and to explain ideas clearly\, which deepens your own understanding and memory. \nAnd I have to say\, I went down just the tiniest rabbit holes that I’m gonna bring up here right now. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard that term\, “Those who can’t\, teach.” Have you heard that before? \nCORAL OWEN:Yeah. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: It’s pretty derogatory and it’s really not helpful. And frankly\, it’s not even the original phrase that came from Aristotle. Aristotle said\, “Those who can\, do\, and those who understand\, teach.” \nCORAL OWEN: Oh. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And so it kind of\, yeah\, during I forget which play\, but during like a play\, they kind of messed with the [00:03:00] language a little bit. \nAnd it ended up turning into this long-term derogatory thing that we say basically\, “People who teach\, they teach because they can’t actually do the work.” And that’s not true at all. Teachers have to both be able to do it and they have to be able to stay on top of everything and understand. \nSo anyway\, this is why the protege effect works. It’s not just about mastering the content either. So reviews of decades of research show that regular knowledge sharing among employees leads to greater innovation\, to better team performance and stronger collaboration. So when knowledge sharing is part of your group’s routine\, it helps you grow\, adapt\, and succeed\, especially in times of change. \nBut here’s the thing\, most effective sharing doesn’t just happen one way. So research also shows that combining different types of knowledge sharing\, like mini workshops\, quick writeups emails\, peer coaching and more [00:04:00] actually builds a much richer culture of learning. \nThat’s why we’ve put together a roundup of practices today\, and I think we’ve done this a couple times in the last month and it’s been kind of fun. \nCORAL OWEN: It really has been. And it’s kind of like a smorgasbord or charcuterie of strategies. You can just take what works and\, you know\, try and iterate as you go through some different strategies. So\, yeah\, let’s do it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I think you just invented something\, a “Charcuterie of ideas” instead of a smorgasbord. I love it. \nCORAL OWEN: I’ll take credit. I’ll take full credit. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: All right\, please do. Okay. So the first practice that we pulled together is hosting a mini workshop or a “lunch and learn.”  \nIn my organization\, during the pandemic\, we actually did these learning popups where if you had knowledge to share\, you would just send everyone an email and say\, “Hey\, if you can make it great\, but I’m gonna do it this time\, this day\, and we’ll record it in case you can’t make it.” \nBut [00:05:00] whatever way works for you. This doesn’t need to be anything fancy. Just carve out 20 minutes\, 30 minutes to show your team what you’ve learned. Use a practical example and invite questions. Making it interactive actually will boost both your team’s retention and your own. \nCORAL OWEN: I just\, I love that idea of like a popup workshop or\, you know\, just something like\, “Oh\, hey\, I learned this thing\,” and just harnessing that energy and that excitement and then passing it along. You know\, I think too\, sometimes we kind of overcomplicate this idea of a workshop. Like it has to be this full blown training\, complete with slides and handouts and\, you know\, all of these knowledge checkpoints. \nAnd really just like you said\, even 15 or 20 minutes can be so useful to spark some great conversation and brainstorming\, even innovation. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And you can use slides if you want to\, especially if it helps you get your point across. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Whatever works for you. But let’s move on to the next one. So this next one is\, create bite-sized training resources. [00:06:00] So you could record a short video on a new tool that you’ve learned. You could write a quick how-to with or without screenshots\, whatever your preference. \nIt’s your resource. Or you could make a checklist to share in your team chat\, or if you’ve got a team wiki or you know\, some other space where you typically share things like that. This approach caters to different learning styles. So some people might prefer the checklist or they might prefer a video\, but it also caters to your own style of wanting to share information. \nSo\, catering to different learning styles is another element that is kind of found to increase knowledge\, retention\, and sharing at work. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. I personally trend towards the videos. Screen capture with some of the voiceovers. But I love that there are so many formats\, especially leveraging different types of technologies these days for quick gathers of information with a little bit of an additive narration or whatever\, that make it so [00:07:00] easy to distribute and capture knowledge\, and share it along with people who may benefit from it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I mean\, I would say an incredible example of this is when you created a training video for me on how to post these podcast episodes to our WordPress page\, and I think it’s silent. And if it isn’t silent then\, you know\, I never heard the sound. But even when it was silent\, like I could see\, you know\, the mouse was circling a certain thing and clicking on it. \nAnd I still use that sometimes to remember if I miss something\, right? I don’t want to miss something. It was perfect. And then you posted it in a shared space and it’s an easy shared folder\, it was easy to find. \nSo\, let’s move on to the next one. This is another favorite of mine. Try doing one-on-one peer coaching. \nShowing a colleague firsthand how you’re using a new process or a new skill can really spark change and the peer tutoring effect actually boosts your own mastery as well. \nCORAL OWEN: Agreed. Jess\, this is actually one of my favorites as well\, and I’ve [00:08:00] noticed that when I take time to walk someone through a process\, I almost always catch myself noticing opportunities to elevate how something flows or help it work more smoothly. And teaching never fails to sharpen my own skills as well. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Alright\, next up\, if you love writing\, this is for you. \nYou can create and send a tips-and-tricks email or a mini newsletter to your colleagues\, or to whoever you’re trying to teach what you’re learning to. You could sum up your top learning points and how it’s helped you. This really makes the knowledge easily accessible and it creates a record for your team to refer back to and for you to refer back to. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. I think there are\, this was\, you know\, probably eight\, ten years ago when I first started a particular professional track in my life. There were a number of blogs that I would refer to about\, you know\, educational technology and learning so much from those just widely available resources. \nBut having [00:09:00] that sort of personal knowledge database to you to track your own journey\, which is something that we talked about in our previous episode. It’s really cool to see those skills develop as well. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. And I would say too\, if you do this one\, you could easily then turn it into I think the second practice we shared\, the creating bite-sized training resources. Like you could repurpose it too and vice versa\, right. \nSo next up we have team huddles and book clubs. I love this option. Team huddles or book clubs can offer a regular space for everyone to share what’s working for them. \nSo having these structured opportunities for exchange is linked to more resilient and innovative teams. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, this is something that I’ve actually done with colleagues throughout the years\, especially the book clubs. And initially some people were like\, “Oh\, I don’t have time every week to do this.” But sometimes it would kind of be like you said\, popup trainings. It would be kind of like a popup book club. \nLike if there was a particular book that a [00:10:00] few folks were interested in\, it’s like\, “Hey\, well let’s just do a popup book club for\, you know\, a particular four or six weeks\,” and then maybe it’d be dormant for a little while until the next quarter\, and then we kind of pop it back up or breathe more life into something else. \nBut yeah it’s just so fun when it’s sort of baked into the way that you work. And there is sort of that culture shift as well of\, you don’t have to overthink it\, it just becomes part of what you do. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. All right\, last one. Invite a teammate to shadow you as you try a new skill\, or run a live demo so others can see it in action. Interactivity like this\, including observation and hands-on trial\, is shown to significantly improve retention and understanding. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. Things a hundred percent stick way better when we’re able to see them and experience them firsthand. You’re so right. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, so that’s why we did a roundup this time because the research is pretty clear that when sharing is varied\, [00:11:00] when you can employ more than one option when it’s regular and part of daily life\, everyone\, including the person doing the sharing\, learns more. They feel more confident\, and it contributes to a stronger\, more adaptable team. \nCORAL OWEN: Awesome. Yep. And you heard it here. So I would love to\, I know that we’ve got our mailbag open so we would love to hear if y’all try out some of these practices or combine a few\, and see what works. \nPlease share with us what’s working. Jess\, what is the best way for everybody to get in touch with us? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, so share your stories\, your struggles\, your wins at practicing connection@oneop.org\, and maybe we’ll feature them on a future episode. \nUntil next time\, keep learning\, sharing\, growing\, and of course\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/dont-keep-it-to-yourself-creating-a-culture-of-shared-learning/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250911T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250911T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250911T100155Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251119T165812Z
UID:10001623-1757570400-1757610000@oneop.org
SUMMARY:5 Strategies for Integrating New Skills into Daily Practice
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The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzgyMTk3MSUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc4MjE5NzEtNS1zdHJhdGVnaWVzLWZvci1pbnRlZ3JhdGluZy1uZXctc2tpbGxzLWludG8tZGFpbHktcHJhY3RpY2UuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzgyMTk3MSUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 37) \nAre you ready to move from  “learning” into doing ?  \nToday we’re sharing 5 strategies that can help you integrate new skills into your daily practice\, to reduce that overwhelm and remember what you’ve learned. \nCo-hosts Jessica and Coral are here to show us how to keep that momentum going\, so those skills don’t just stay in a notebook\, but actually begin to show up in your day to day. \nCoral has some practical\, approachable steps that anyone can try\, regardless of your role\, your team structure or where you’re based. \nThe hope is that as you listen\, you can take what speaks to you and adapt it to suit your own work and life. \nAnd don’t feel compelled or overwhelmed that you have to try them all at once\, or even all of them at all. You can just take what works for you\, remix\, adapt and pivot. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\nSend us a text\n\nOneOp Academy is a free online series designed for anyone interested in positive change\, whether you’re an educator\, community leader\, student\, or just passionate about supporting families. \nThis year’s Academy spotlights the unique challenges facing military connected youth\, from mental health to resilience education to community support. \nExplore the 2025 OneOp Academy and register today at oneop.org/series/2025academy[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi. Thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica. Today we’ll be talking about how to move from learning into doing\, specifically five strategies that can help you integrate new skills into your daily practice. My co-host\, Coral\, is here to guide us through today’s practice. Hey Coral\, how are you? \nCORAL OWEN: Hey Jessica. I’m doing really well\, thanks. I just finished facilitating a workshop last week and one of the things that came up in conversation was how energizing it can feel to leave professional development opportunities\, but a week later it kind of sometimes fizzles. It’s not a bad thing\, just\, you know\, noting reality. \nAnd that’s actually exactly what we’re going to talk about today is how to keep that momentum going\, so those skills don’t just stay in a notebook\, but actually begin to show up in your day to day. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yes\, I am so looking forward to this topic. I love this. Keeping those notes in the [00:01:00] notebook often happens to me. I can relate to that so much. So I’m really looking forward to hearing about what these practices are you’re going to be sharing with us\, and we would love to hear what strategies you use to apply skills in your work or daily life. \nSend us a note at Practicing connection@oneop.org. We see and respond to every message and we can’t wait to hear your ideas. \n– break – \nOkay\, let’s get into it. Coral\, can you walk us through these five strategies for building new skills into daily practice? \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. So these are practical\, approachable steps that anyone can try regardless of your role\, your team structure or where you’re based. And so we’re going to be walking through each of the five\, and I’ll share each one\, along with some examples as well. And so my hope is that as you listen\, that y’all can take what speaks to you and adapt it to [00:02:00] suit your own work and life. \nBut please don’t feel compelled or overwhelmed that you have to try all of them at once\, or all of them at all. You can just take what works for you as always\, or you can remix them. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Right. \nCORAL OWEN: 100%. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, this sounds great. Let’s get going. \nCORAL OWEN: Awesome. So yeah\, let’s get right down to it. So the first strategy is all about micro goals. So when we learn something new\, it can feel overwhelming to apply it perfectly straight away. Micro goals break the skill down into bite-sized manageable actions. And so\, if you just learned a new communication technique\, for example\, your micro goal\, it might be to use it just once during a single meeting this week. \nSmall steps can make this skill less intimidating\, and it also gives you little wins that build confidence. It’s like training a muscle. It just\, you know\, builds that strength and momentum over time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I like that\, it’s less sort of\, “How do I overhaul everything\,” and more\, “How can I try [00:03:00] one thing in one moment?” \nCORAL OWEN: A thousand percent\, and we’re also reducing that friction to start by just a monumental degree. So\, okay. Our second strategy is one that we actually highlighted in the January 16th episode at the start of this year. A personal favorite\, not to play favorites\, but this one is habit stacking\, and the idea here is pairing your new skill with something that you already do regularly and often automatically. \nFor instance\, if you review your to-do list every morning\, you can immediately follow that with applying a new productivity technique that you’ve learned\, such as tackling your highest priority task first. And essentially this existing habit that we anchor into it becomes the trigger for the new one that you’re cultivating. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I think\, if I remember right from that episode\, you had a fantastic example of like when you make your coffee\, ’cause you know\, you make coffee every morning\, that you pair that up with something else. I don’t remember what that was\, but I do remember it was a [00:04:00] great example because I also make coffee every morning. \nSo\, super practical. I use this often myself. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. And yeah\, taking advantage of what’s already working with your daily rhythm helps keep this very approachable. And you’ll note that this is going to be a trend throughout all of these strategies\, is to really just grease the skids so that you can feel like you can take action easily\, quickly\, and keep it sustainable. \nAnd so straight into our third strategy\, which is daily reflection. So at the end of the day\, each day\, you can briefly check in with yourself asking\, “How did I use my new skill today? Did I use it?” Again\, these don’t have to be massive practices. This one can just be a 30 to 60 second check-in\, and maybe it’s a brief note in your planner or\, I know a lot of people were using bullet journals a while back. \nNot sure if that’s still in vogue. But\, you know\, maybe it’s just a little bullet that you mark in whatever your strategy: voice\, memo\, et cetera. The point is [00:05:00] simply to capture both the successes and the challenges. And this reflection also reinforces the new action. Helps you see patterns and trends over time. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, seeing those trends is really helpful. I did this for a while where I had a couple of personal goals\, because unfortunately I tend – fortunately or unfortunately – I tend to prioritize work. And so I had this period of time where I was trying to prioritize some personal goals. \nAnd I have to tell you\, it was super motivating to see the trend of when I was tracking it\, to see the trend of\, that I was actually spending time on a goal that I had. So you might not even realize you accomplish something a few times a week until you start to look at that. And that’s what I noticed as well. Like I actually was doing the things that I wanted to do\, but they were taking up less space in my brain. \nAnd so because I could see the tracking\, it helped to create some more momentum to keep it going. \nCORAL OWEN: Exactly. And I think too\, the piece here [00:06:00] is that these\, you know\, micro goals are\, you know\, things that we’re really breaking down to be so bite sized. It is such a brief touchpoint within our day that sometimes you even forget that you did it yesterday\, the day before. \nSo having that concrete documentation where you can see that trend over time\, it really just reinforces\, “Oh\, okay\, I’m actually doing the thing.’ And then\, you know\, that doing of the thing\, it can grow and grow over time into whatever you hope it is becoming. À \nAlright. Our fourth strategy is creating reminders and queues. So again\, you might see a little bit of overlap in some of these\, and that is okay. For this fourth strategy\, reminders and cues\, it really comes down to the fact that we are juggling a lot\, all of us. \nI know that to be true\, and so sometimes a helpful nudge can be exactly what we need. And so this reminder or cue can look as simple as a sticky note on your monitor\, on your desktop\, whatever. \nSometimes calendar alerts are helpful\, even digital prompts like [00:07:00] notifications or\, you know\, an alarm that is labeled on your phone. Whatever it is. So just a simple example might be if you want to trial a new question technique\, you can set a reminder for your calls or your meetings that says simply\, “Use open-ended questions.” \nAnd things like this\, these tiny triggers\, what they do is they just help bring that skill to the forefront of your brain when you actually need it. Rather than having it done in a notebook\, where you have to like go look for it and\, you know\, just again\, it’s just it brings it to top of mind when you actually have the space to use it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That is really\, I mean\, that’s just so realistic. Without reminders\, even the best intentions can get lost in the shuffle of a busy day. And can I just say\, as someone who teaches interpersonal communication\, the example you used of getting a message that you’ve sent to yourself that reminds you to use open-ended questions is just wonderful. \nCORAL OWEN: Thank you. Yeah\, and this is really\, it’s not about [00:08:00] willpower. This one specifically\, it’s about designing your environment so that skill has space to show up. \nAlrighty\, bringing it on home. This is our final one\, but certainly not the least of them all. And that is building the skill into meetings and processes. \nAnd I know this might seem it’s a little bit different in flavor than our other four\, I like this one though\, because it’s really cool and you’ll see why here in a second. But this one is\, it’s all about weaving your new learning into the structures that already exist. \nSo\, again\, just for instance\, to give this a little bit more\, give it some legs\, you might volunteer to lead a portion of a meeting where you’re using that skill\, or suggesting to add it to the team workflow. And the magic of this one is by embedding it into your regular work patterns. You make it part of the culture of\, you know\, your work team or\, you know\, your day-to-day life. \nAnd it’s not just an individual endeavor any longer. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: This one feels [00:09:00] really impactful\, because it’s not only enforcing your learning\, but it’s reaching entire teams\, and it’s kind of starting to build in maybe a culture of using the new things that you’re learning. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, exactly. This is truly one of the best ways to sustain change of any sort is when others are a part of it. It doesn’t just live in your head\, but it becomes part of our collective practices. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, I really appreciate you sharing these strategies with us because they were super clear and super actionable. Thank you so much. \nCORAL OWEN: Thanks Jessica\, and since this one did have\, you know\, quite a number of things that we touched on\, I just want to do a real quick recap just to bring it on home. \nSo\, as a reminder\, the five strategies we discussed today were micro goals\, habits stacking\, daily reflection\, reminders and triggers\, and building skills into meetings and processes. \nAnd again\, just as a very warm reminder\, you do not have to [00:10:00] do all of these at once. You don’t have to do all of them ever. Just simply start with the one or two that resonate most with you\, and then build from there and see what happens. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Or don’t build. You don’t have to even build. If you don’t\, if it works really well for you\, then just keep going with it. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That’s it for this episode. Thanks so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this episode\, please take a moment to share it with a friend or colleague. We’ll be back next week with a new episode. \nUntil then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/5-strategies-for-integrating-new-skills-into-daily-practice/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/Yulia-Furman-Adobe-Stock.png
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BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250904T080000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250904T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250904T100144Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260330T202025Z
UID:10001621-1756972800-1757005200@oneop.org
SUMMARY:From Outreach to Impact: Extension’s Role with Military-Connected Communities. With Rachel Brauner and Karrie Calloway
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]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[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 36) \nThis episode of Practicing Connection explores the incredible bridge-building work happening in Texas with guest Karrie Calloway – military liaison\, educator\, chef\, and advocate – who doesn’t just connect resources\, but transforms lives. \nJoin host Jessica Beckendorf and guest co-host Rachel Brauner for a compelling conversation today with Karrie Calloway\, Texas 4-H Military Liaison and a passionate advocate for military-connected families. \nKarrie shares her unique journey from farm-to-table learning and culinary arts to leading statewide initiatives that support youth\, families\, and thriving communities. \nIn this episode\, we discuss: \n\nThe daily work of connecting Extension agents\, volunteers\, and installations to create meaningful support networks.\nPractical\, high-impact ways anyone can do to include and empower military-connected families in their programs.\nThe crucial role of volunteers in building bridges for military youth and families.\nSustaining yourself in service-oriented work—and why ongoing connection matters.\n\nWhether you’re an Extension professional\, service provider\, volunteer\, or simply interested in community-building\, you’ll walk away inspired by fresh ideas and the power of purposeful connection. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/ \nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org \nSend us a text\n\nOneOp Academy is a free online series designed for anyone interested in positive change\, whether you’re an educator\, community leader\, student\, or just passionate about supporting families. \nThis year’s Academy spotlights the unique challenges facing military connected youth\, from mental health to resilience education to community support. \nExplore the 2025 OneOp Academy and register today at oneop.org/series/2025academy[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, welcome to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica Beckendorf\, and I’m so excited today to welcome not only our guest\, but also a guest co-host\, Rachel Bronner from OneOp. Rachel works with the Texas A&M AgriLife Extension Service\, specializing in military and community health. She brings a ton of expertise supporting service members and families. Rachel\, welcome. Would you mind introducing yourself a bit? \nRACHEL BRAUNER: Hi. Thanks for having me. As you mentioned Jessica\, I support OneOp’s efforts\, especially within the lifespan caregiving area\, but I also serve as an extension program specialist for military and community health with Texas A&M AgriLife Extension Service\, as you mentioned. And in this role I really develop and deliver educational programs that supports providers\, service members\, military families\, and those department defense civilians. \n[00:01:00] And a lot of my work really focuses on topics like Alzheimer’s disease and dementia\, caring for older adults and individuals with disabilities\, especially those when we think about maybe children with special healthcare needs. I also have done work surrounding mental health and alcohol and substance use. Then I also work closely with military professionals across the country to really help better understand caregiver needs and provide services that help reduce those challenges of caring maybe for either a wounded service member or\, as I mentioned\, those individuals with special needs. \nAnd then I’ve had the opportunity to really support prevention and education programs throughout the state of Texas\, really in those family support programs on Texas military installations. So a lot of the work that we’ve done here\, is work in partnerships with Joint Base San Antonio\, Fort Bliss and Fort Hood. \nSo I’m just excited to be here today and help support this podcast. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: One thing I didn’t mention is that this is your [00:02:00] first time on this podcast. I’ve been going through the different collaboration teams\, on all of our colleagues and collaborating on episodes like this. So I’m so happy to have you here and you do fantastic work\, Rachel. And I’m also looking forward to our conversation today. \nI’m also delighted to welcome our guest\, Karrie Callaway. Karrie is a true bridge builder with Texas A&M AgriLife Extension Service in Harris County\, where she connects agriculture\, education\, health and community engagement to make a real difference. As the Texas 4-H military liaison\, Karrie leads programs for military connected youth and families supporting resilience\, leadership and life skills across Texas\, from military bases to local communities as well. Your experience\, Karrie\, I was just blown away. \nSo she’s also a certified chef and educator who creates innovative farm-to-table learning experiences for all ages. And she partners with schools and [00:03:00] organizations to bring nutrition and garden-based education into communities beyond her professional work. Oh\, and that’s only the tip of the iceberg\, by the way. With Karrie\, she’s got a lot of really cool experiences. Beyond her professional work though\, Karrie is also a military spouse and a parent\, roles that further inspire her passion for serving military families and building stronger\, healthier communities. Karrie \, welcome to Practicing Connection. \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Thank you for having me. Thank you. Great introduction. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Thank you. I mean\, it was a really difficult one because you have so many cool background experiences. So\, you have mentioned in a previous conversation we had that serving people has always been heavy on your heart. So when you think about your journey into extension and this focus on military families\, would you say the work found you or you found the work? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: The work definitely found me. I think it actually started a little bit from [00:04:00] childhood\, now that I think about it. Just again\, feeding the homeless and feeding kids\, or giving out toys during Christmas time. And then Extension finding me\, it just was a heartfelt thing to kind of serve my community\, because I grew up doing it. \nRACHEL BRAUNER: And Karrie\, your early experience is from growing up around farming\, your journey into the Extension program itself and the work that you’re doing\, and as Jessica mentioned\, those farm to table practices\, do you see some of the trends carrying throughout your work with the families today? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Yes\, I definitely do. I grew up in a family catering company. So I grew up cooking my whole life. Again\, serving in hospitality and just that idea\, which I didn’t really know of\, again\, farm to table. I grew up\, you know\, during summertime\, coming to Texas and running around large landmarks. \nAnd so just that connectivity between [00:05:00] food and agriculture really was instilled in me as a very young child. But then to find Extension\, that has both these pivotal things that we do to serve our community\, we teach people how to cook and be healthy. alongside of this agriculture production of farming and livestock and 4-H and the idea of STEM education for youth. \nI think it’s like a streamline of all of the things that\, again\, was instilled in me as a child. And so to be able to translate that and actually teach that to the community\, it’s very heartfelt and it’s very fulfilling. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. I would say Extension work definitely found me also. So that resonates with me a lot. Like it was just sort of a\, it’s almost like every\, all of my experiences leading up to that was preparing me exactly for Extension work. \nSo\, it sounds like you had a similar kind of [00:06:00] experience. \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Yes\, the journey of getting to extension is a very long one\, and people say I’m so young to have such a heavy journey. But\, I went and studied at a culinary school in New York called the Culinary Institute of America. And then once doing that\, I decided to move and go to Australia\, and I noticed just the agriculture production and when it relates to restaurant or restaurateur\, how that correlates. And I wanted to bring that experience back with me to America. So I went and studied plant and soil science\, and in that journey\, again\, Extension found me. \nWhile I was going to school\, I lived in Houston\, a lot of hospitality work while studying my undergrad\, and again Extension found me and I found building out different community gardens and just again\, while studying\, I wanted to be hands-on. It was very important for me. [00:07:00] So started building out these community gardens and Extension got word of me building out these community gardens in Houston\, and they came and sat and I fed them barbecue and I cooked for them and I went on this long-winded journey and they were like\, “You’re gonna be a student aide\, we’re gonna build you up.” \nSo all four years of my undergrad\, I was a student aide with Extension. And as soon as I graduated\, David Wright\, my director here in Harris County\, he picked me up and said\, “Hey\, we need you\, we need you as community engagement. You’ve been doing this work for four years in research\, on the community\, and it really has taken like wildfire.” \nI think the first two weeks of working for Extension\, Fox News called me and I was like\, wait\, what? What’s going on here? And they wanted more information and to talk about again\, agriculture production. \nSo it’s literally something that found me and then something that’s stuck. I love it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I didn’t realize that the answer to that question was going to be so literal\, that like literally they found you. [00:08:00] Incredible. \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Incredible. Yes\, actually. So\, definitely\, I was interviewing and looking for work right after college and I got an email in the middle of an interview and it was from David Wright and he said\, “We want to interview for this community engagement job.” And I was like\, “Community engagement? I’m a chef and a farmer. How does that correlate?” \nI mean\, I do serve the community\, and then I realized what that entailed. And during my interview process\, I mentioned that I was a military spouse and he was like\, “Oh\, I have something else\, something great for you.” And I was like\, “What is it?” And he’s like\, “We work with these military families and these kids.” \nAnd he got really excited and fired up. And then I got really excited and fired up. And so it literally\, again\, the work found me and just the right time\, right moment. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. \nSo Karrie\, from your personal journey\, let’s zoom out a little\, [00:09:00] to the kind of work you do now. A really big part of your role is connecting people: extension agents\, installations\, community partners\, which we know isn’t always easy. Your role as a liaison is about building bridges\, between installations\, extension agents\, volunteers\, families. What does that look like day to day and what challenges do you face\, keeping those relationships strong given how often people rotate in and out. \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Yes. So what I really try to do at least every quarter is connect with not only the agents\, but also the installations\, and connecting the installations with the agent. So I do something called a virtual working call\, that allows the agents\, and again\, the installations to express themselves\, simply to have a platform to speak\, maybe round table\, if you will\, of some of the struggles that they’re personally having. \nMaybe possibly connecting with another agent in their area and/or [00:10:00] maybe some different needs\, equipment that they need to start a garden project and or some resources or funding resources or\, is there sub-award\, grant funding available\, to allow them to achieve their next goal or step. \nSometimes it’s as easy as shipping out STEM kits to the installation and providing a trainer to the folks that are working at the installation. But with the in and out rotation\, a lot of the installation workers are spousal support\, and so maybe they’re stationed somewhere else in the next couple of months. \nSo with that being said\, sometimes that transition between agent communication and installation communication kind of gets lost in translation. And so I just try to continue to build that relationship with directors there\, which is typically a stable person that is on the installation base alongside with the agent. \nAnd then just making sure that communication is streamlined and clear. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Do other states have liaisons like [00:11:00] you? I mean\, I know Wisconsin does\, I know that some are maybe more active and less active\, are you\, do you all talk and\, share tips? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Yes\, we have conferences\, we have academies. Actually one of my colleagues actually just graduated from the academy\, which again is almost a three month training where you go to different states and you get to know each other. And you get to connect with the other liaisons and/or other agents that are working with military families. \nAnd so I do feel that the 4-H military partnership makes a pretty important impact\, connecting us and setting the stage for us to stay connected with each other. Because again\, when you have a family that might get stationed in another state\, us having that line of communication is pretty important. Because maybe someone is moving to Texas and they need to connect with us to a local agent\, and Texas is so big\, so I have to connect them to an agent in that specific county. \nBut again\, vice versa\, if someone [00:12:00] moves to Washington DC or for instance\, hosts a summer camp where multiple kids came from multiple different states\, and they may not necessarily know about 4-H\, but they wanna know after the camp happened\, I now am connecting them to their state liaison that then connects them to their county agent\, and different clubs in that area. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, I’m curious. Because for those of you who may not know Extension very well\, for one thing\, when Karrie mentions agents\, there are some states that refer to their Extension educators as “agents.” Some of them refer to them just as “Extension educators.” So when you hear ‘agent\,’ she’s really speaking about someone who works for an Extension service who has a certain role that works in communities and counties. For example\, my role is in community development and local government. And\, Karrie’s role is in youth. She’s a youth liaison. Is that your whole role\, Karrie? We talked a little bit about your role already\, I know [00:13:00] that\, but is your whole role with youth\, your entire role in Harris County Extension? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: No. So\, I’m actually the community engagement coordinator for Harris County specifically. Actually we only have one in the state of Texas\, but I work within an urban community\, so\, you know\, we’re dealing with over 4.5 million people at any given time in an urban area. And so that community engagement position is really for me not only to engage with possibly our\, our local commissioners or mayor’s office and or news channels or news stations\, but also dealing with media relations\, along with communicating with our local\, different people that are\, again\, commissioner\, mayor’s office\, their team and trickles down to the bottom line team. \nAnd then again\, you know\, Harris Health\, who are our local partners. So my boss always says\, “My job covers the three Ps: People\, Partnership\, [00:14:00] and Programs. So all the way from the partnerships and possibly\, obtaining some grant funding\, to build out these different community gardens\, for instance\, or working with the local school districts. \nWe have plenty of those. I’m connecting all of the three Ps\, the partnerships\, the programs\, and the people. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, thank you so much for making that distinction. I know that Extensions operate differently in different states. We are everywhere and we do a lot of similar things like you just described\, with the community engagement coordinator. I think you just described so much of what I did when I was working in a county. But we were called community development educators\, so it was just very different across the state. So\, yeah\, Thank you so much for making that distinction. \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Yes. I get the luxury of managing\, I have a lot of hats and I enjoy my hats that I wear. So managing a lot of different projects within the community of Houston\, but beyond that\, in the state of Texas. Being the 4-H military [00:15:00] liaison\, again\, working with all of the installations within Texas\, and just seeing again\, how to connect our programs to the people. \nRACHEL BRAUNER: Karrie and Jessica\, y’all just talked so much about how Extension agents kind of have their plates full a lot of time. You’re constantly juggling different roles\, different jobs. You’re that educator\, Karrie\, but then you’re also a 4-H military liaison\, so we’re wearing a lot of different hats\, really making sure that we’re connecting with our communities and our installations. And then with our\, what we call here in the state of Texas\, with AgriLife is our county extension agents. And so in Texas we have 250 offices that encompass the 254 counties that make up the state of Texas. So there’s so many counties and so many county offices that there’s such a big Extension footprint here in the state. And a lot of our\, what we call Extension agents out in those counties have [00:16:00] multiple roles\, whether they’re focusing on 4-H\, they’re focusing on health and wellness and nutrition\, maybe animal agriculture and natural resources. And they have so much going on on their plate. And so when we as Extension educators that are focusing on military connected populations\, from your perspective\, Karrie\, what are some high impact\, low effort ways that extension staff can keep families in mind in their programming out in their counties? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: I think getting involved. You know\, I always speak about the three Ps\, but also just our volunteer base is pretty pivotal for what we do. And all of the hats that we wear within Extension and leaning on our volunteers\, like our master gardener volunteers\, as we call it\, and or our master wellness volunteers. \nAnd we have other categories of\, again\, a large volunteer\, 4-H volunteers\, which could [00:17:00] be a parent and or an older sibling\, that have you know\, been through the 4-H program\, starting at a young age. I think leaning on just our community\, again\, our partnerships is key\, as well as our volunteers. \nPartnerships is very\, very\, very important to me\, within Extension because we can’t do it alone and we don’t want to do it alone. So\, you know\, maybe a partner might fulfill something that we don’t necessarily do\, within Extension\, but it’s still a need. So I have a community of people that come to me for all different various topics. \nYou kind of name it\, they come to me about it\, financial literacy\, STEM education\, and you know\, something of that nature. So being able to pull on a partner or a community partner and or a volunteer\, that might be someone that’s an expert at that particular topic. And then our experts are specialists. \nWe have a very large group of specialists within Extension as well. And I also lean on [00:18:00] them and their expertise\, because they’re very knowledgeable and that’s kind of that extension of the university\, right? We’re extending information from the university\, so from professors to specialists all the way. \nAgain\, we talked about agents in Texas and then our volunteer base. That’s kind of like the streamline of what the community can really lean on and depend on. And there’s a lot of us that are willing to serve the community. But I think that that’s kind of what\, again\, my job and my role is\, is to figure out that streamline\, to support what we’re trying to do with an Extension. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So I really want to tease out a little bit of this idea of the value of volunteers\, that you were talking about. So like 4-H has a set of volunteers\, master gardeners\, I think we have master naturalists here. I don’t know if you guys have that. And I just heard about one too\, a new one that like this model has been replicated over and over again because it’s such a powerful model. [00:19:00] So the value of volunteers in creating touchpoints for military families\, how have you seen volunteers play that connector role in meaningful ways and how can we maybe take better advantage of that\, or boost that? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Rachel might have to help me with this one\, from her perspective as well\, but I think\, asking – number one\, you know\, a lot of people are afraid to ask for help\, and the worst answer you can get is no. That’s what I’ve always heard. So I think asking is very key. But there’s another side to this because there’s volunteers and there’s also resources\, right? \nSo asking the community that simply just want to serve and give their time\, and possibly even resources. So we have our volunteers\, but then we also have people that want to just simply give in kind donations. So really just again\, leaning on partnerships in the community\, volunteers\, to pour back into the community is\, key\, right? \nAnd that [00:20:00] doesn’t mean necessarily someone is giving their time. That could also mean in-kind donations to achieve the larger goal of whatever a community garden\, for instance\, or maybe you’re trying to put on a six week series cooking course. So your local grocery stores might want to give funding or resources or even just simply groceries to achieve that program or that project that that 4-H student or that group or that club is trying to achieve. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I would imagine then that the volunteers in that way\, because they’re having so many touchpoints with the families\, can also help the people who are putting the programs together understand what they’re hearing\, so that maybe program adjustments can be made\, or maybe programs times\, or\, you know\, making things more convenient or making changes to it. \nSo\, yeah. It seems like that it’s a pivotal role\, for two reasons\, the touch points with the families\, and then also gaining [00:21:00] information for program improvements. \nRACHEL BRAUNER: Well\, the volunteers are just so important in making that connection with Extension\, and then our communities\, because even though Extension has a large presence\, at least here in the state of Texas as just a reference\, we can’t do everything and be everywhere. And so those volunteers are so important to our programs and supports for example\, in Bexar County where Joint Base San Antonio is located\, we have a great master garden’s program where the agent\, the county extension agent in Bexar County\, where Bexar County is located in Military City USA in San Antonio\, Texas. And so that county Extension agent and their program\, the Master Gardeners Program\, all of their volunteers are predominantly\, a large population or percentage of that volunteer group is military connected. \nSo they’re predominantly [00:22:00] veterans that have transitioned out\, that live in that community and they want to give back. And so we have found\, or what we’ve seen in Bexar County\, as a lot of our volunteers\, those veteran volunteers\, are providing a lot of peer support in those communities. So they are working closely with the installations. They’re working closely outside the gates to provide support. And then because they have that military experience\, they’re providing a lot of peer support to the audiences that they’re serving and supporting. And so this is just a great way to see an example of how our extension volunteers are supporting our military connected populations. \nAnd so we may not always ask our volunteers of who their backgrounds are. Or\, you know\, if they have a military experience\, because we’re just so excited to be able to have the support of volunteers. But then it’s really important\, especially those [00:23:00] programs that we have located near an installation\, that those volunteers have a little bit of that experience that they’re bringing to support the active duty population. \nSo that’s always fun and exciting to see\, and it just shows that value that those volunteers and their experiences bring to supporting us. \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Also\, during the process of becoming a master gardener volunteer\, for instance\, they actually go through training. It’s almost like going back to college. And it is\, it could be lengthy at times\, but it’s important because we’re not just asking them to come and volunteer their time\, but we’re also giving them the specific information to make sure that it’s\, you know\, research based information straight from the university\, to actually provide the community with\, again\, things within nutrition and/or agriculture\, horticulture topics. So volunteering their time\, but also training them to provide the community with the right information. \nRACHEL BRAUNER: Karrie\, your [00:24:00] explanation on volunteers and Extension was just really a helpful reminder of how we can extend our reach in so many powerful ways\, and it connects something else to your work\, because mentioned you’re based in Harris County\, which is for those that are listening is Houston\, Texas\, or in the area of Houston\, Texas. \nAnd it’s one of the largest veteran populations here in the state. And so of course\, military service doesn’t end when someone transitions out from an active duty status. And so families are still raising children\, they’re still facing similar challenges to their civilian counterparts. And still looking for that support\, even when getting out of active duty. So how should Extension be thinking about how we support that transition\, both during and after service? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Yeah\, that’s a great question. Starting with really going back to just doing it\, I think is very key\, but also acknowledging [00:25:00] that it’s important for us to serve our families that are within active duty and transitioning into becoming a civilian\, or becoming a veteran. I think it’s even more important for us to support our families that are transitioning into becoming a veteran because there’s a lot of that right now. \nAnd there will be in the next three years\, we think of the ones who started being in the military at 18\, they’re now 32. I know my spouse’s first sergeant and he’ll be retired in two years\, and he’s already starting to think of different ways. He’s a humanitarian already on his own. \nAnd so he’s already in the community serving\, but\, we have to think the military have a servant heart. So they’re looking for ways to serve their communities\, to still feel connected to the service\, right? And so that’s a big thing\, and it’s very pivotal and important for someone that’s serving in the military because they’re like a comradery. \nThey’re a huge family. And so them transitioning out into being [00:26:00] civilians\, they’re still looking for that comradery. Extension\, it’s important for us to support that and think of ways that we can better support our military families\, throughout. Again\, being an active duty member and or veteran\, and even if that’s asking them simply to volunteer their time\, is a great way to make an impact to\, again\, a military family and also supporting them with 4-H programs\, right? \nTheir kiddos are looking for things to do. They’re looking for their kiddos to do something. I had the luxury of planning a summer camp with about 60 kids this summer. And the way that it reached the masses\, right? Over 120 kids signed up. It was really spousal support\, right? So a mom told another mom\, told another mom\, told another mom. \nAnd it was a very emotional moment to even connect with the kids\, right? And communicate with kids because they were looking\, they were teens\, right? They were looking for something to do that was different. They’re used to this parent that [00:27:00] serves in this high risk management role. And so for them to do something active and with their hands and just adventurous\, I think was very key and pivotal and they really\, really took well to it. \nSo it’s our job with an Extension to really figure out different ways to target this audience. \nRACHEL BRAUNER: Thank you\, and thanks so much for letting me join you and Jessica today on this podcast. I’m excited\, especially\, Karrie\, as a fellow colleague and peer working together across Texas A&M Aggro Life Extension. It’s always fun to hear what our Extension folks are doing throughout the state\, and so the work that you’re doing is exciting\, it’s great and it makes me want to work more with people like you and the importance of how to connect all of our different programs to better support military connected populations. And so I’m so excited about the work that you’re doing in your area. Thanks\, Jessica. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:28:00] You are so welcome. And Karrie\, before we go\, first\, this has been such a rich conversation about your journey\, your work\, and the role Extension can play for military connected families. But before we wrap up\, I think I warned you about this question. I’d love to turn to you personally for a moment. What is one thing you do or one thing you practice that sustains or supports you in your work? Like cooking could be one of them\, but I’ll leave that up to – is that what you were gonna say? \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: It is\, yes. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Oh I stole your thunder! \nKARRIE CALLOWAY: Gardening and cooking and actually cooking with my daughter. And even my spouse\, her dad has taken it on\, full on. He’s stationed in California while I’m in Texas. And so even when she goes and visits him\, he cooks with her because he knows it’s our thing and it’s something that really connects and bonds them. \nI mean\, he sends me pictures of them baking cookies and all kinds of stuff\, stuff I don’t even do with her. And so I think cooking will always [00:29:00] be my number one go-to. Again\, growing up my dad was a chef. The kitchen is home and it will always be my grounding space and gardening just kind of adds to it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, one thing I’ll say is in the show notes\, OneOp actually has a little mini course. It’s called\, “Military Culture\, A Guide For Extension Professionals.” If you are an extension professional and you are looking to learn a little bit more about how you might support military families in your area\, this is just a super short\, I think it takes like 45 minutes to an hour to get through a short guide on how to understand military culture\, so that you can serve the families with a little bit more understanding. \nSo that’s it for this episode. Special thanks to our guest\, Karrie Callaway and the guest co-host Rachel Brauner for the first time\, hopefully not the last. \nIf you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend. We’d love to hear what you’ve been thinking about and [00:30:00] what’s inspiring you. You can share that with us by clicking the Send us a text message at the top of the description of this episode. If you’re listening on a computer\, you can email us at practicingconnection@oneop.org. We can’t wait to hear from you. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/from-outreach-to-impact-extensions-role-with-military-connected-communities-with-rachel-brauner-and-karrie-calloway/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
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LAST-MODIFIED:20251119T165800Z
UID:10001619-1756360800-1756400400@oneop.org
SUMMARY:From Networking to Meaningful Connections: Learning Together
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzcxNjczOCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc3MTY3MzgtZnJvbS1uZXR3b3JraW5nLXRvLW1lYW5pbmdmdWwtY29ubmVjdGlvbnMtbGVhcm5pbmctdG9nZXRoZXIuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzcxNjczOCUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 35) \nProfessional development isn’t just about the content – it’s about the people. \nWhether it’s a quick follow-up question\, a shared takeaway\, or an invitation to debrief\, connecting with others during a learning event can spark fresh ideas\, deepen your understanding\, and expand your network in a meaningful way. \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Coral and Jessica explore how connecting with other attendees – or even speakers – can transform your professional development experience. \nJessica shares a simple\, low-pressure practice for starting conversations\, learning collaboratively\, and expanding your network in ways that feel authentic and focused on shared learning. \nWhether you’re attending in person or online\, discover practical ideas for reaching out\, sharing takeaways\, and creating spaces for meaningful dialogue. \nLinks and resources from this episode: \n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\nOneOp Academy is a free online series designed for anyone interested in positive change\, whether you’re an educator\, community leader\, student\, or just passionate about supporting families. \nThis year’s Academy spotlights the unique challenges facing military connected youth\, from mental health to resilience education to community support. \nExplore the 2025 OneOp Academy and register today at oneop.org/series/2025academy[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”][00:00:00] CORAL OWEN: Hey there. Thank you for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral. Today we’ll be talking about making the most of professional development opportunities through connecting with other attendees\, or even the speaker\, and my co-host Jessica\, will be sharing a practice with us. Hey Jess. How are you today? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hey\, I’m doing pretty great. I’ve been kind of in the spirit of our topic. I’ve been noticing lately that I’ve had a lot going on in my head\, and typing out my to-do list and thoughts weren’t actually helping much. So I actually have more than one journaling app. There’s generally one that I use only\, but I have a journaling app and I have different to-do list apps as well that I like to test out. I’m kind of a productivity tool nerd. But the typing it out wasn’t helping me very much. I go through periods where typing helps and sometimes it doesn’t. \nAnd I’m in a period right now where typing isn’t helping me at [00:01:00] all. So\, I’ve taken up daily pen and paper journaling again\, and pen and paper list making\, pen and paper journaling is a practice that I’ve actually kept for a long time\, but I’ll sometimes go like a few days\, weeks\, or occasionally months without doing it. \nAnd when I’m not doing pen and paper journaling\, I’m generally doing some spotty typing out of my journals. So I thought I’d bring this up because today we’re talking about connecting with others\, and this practice helps me connect with myself. And I’ve learned a long time ago to kind of let go of\, “I don’t have to do things one way all the time.” \nAnd I’ve noticed that there are times when my pen and paper isn’t fast enough for me\, and so I need to go to typing. And then again\, I’ve noticed times when the typing isn’t helping me ensure things get done\, or it’s not helping to really get everything out of my head\, and so I need to go to the physical writing. And so it\, I really have to just be in tune with myself on that.[00:02:00]\nCORAL OWEN: I’m chuckling over here because that\, it’s very much been my experience too\, as someone who\, you know\, kind of is\, has one foot on either side of these generational lines of tech and then also pen and paper. And yeah\, it’s nice to have a format for whatever the situation is feeling like it\, you know\, necessitates\, not requires necessarily. But yeah\, I love that. That’s a great reflection too on being able to connect with yourself and just figure out where you’re at before you turn around and make those intentional connections with other people. I love that. Thank you for sharing. We’d also love to hear what’s inspiring our listeners\, so please do drop us a line at Practicing connection@oneop.org. \nWe see and respond to every message\, and we can’t wait to hear from you. \n– break – \nAlright. Let’s learn more about the power of connection when it comes to making the most of our professional development. Jessica\, can you tell us a little bit more about the practice you’ll be sharing today and [00:03:00] why you chose it? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, of course. I chose this particular activity for two reasons. First\, if we’re looking for things like what’s lighting a spark in us\, which is what we talked about in a previous episode\, or if we’re looking for ways to connect with someone\, then that means that we are fully present\, we’re in the room even if that room is virtual. \nSecond\, I chose this because seeking to connect with someone who is co-learning alongside us\, or seeking to connect with the speakers\, is one way to deepen our learning and to expand our professional network. And you’re expanding your network in a way that centers the connection on your learning\, not on the things that usually make people feel a little icky when networking. \nCORAL OWEN: Oh man. Jess. I know that’s gonna resonate with a lot of people. I feel that pretty deeply and yeah\, having something to center that connection around\, I know it’s going to be helpful for a lot of folks. So can [00:04:00] you go ahead and walk us through on how we might get started? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, absolutely. This actually might be one of the simplest practices we’ve shared. The only step\, the first and only step is to reach out to a fellow participant\, instructor or colleague. So you can do this well in multiple ways\, but I’m going to give you three ways and three reasons for your reach outs. \nSo you might ask them a follow up question during the session. You can ask the speakers or one of the participants who shared something in the chat\, just ask them a follow-up question. That’s all that one is. \nAnother way that you could reach out is\, share a takeaway. This is a really low pressure way to open dialogue. For example\, during a virtual learning setting\, you might put this in the chat. You could say something like\, “One thing that really sparked my thinking today was..” fill in the blank. “I’d love to hear what stood out to others.” You could also do [00:05:00] this in a LinkedIn group or thread. \nMake sure though to tag the speaker or the organization who hosted. They will really appreciate it. And then the third way that you could reach out to a participant\, instructor\, or colleague\, would be to invite connection. So you could invite some colleagues or others to a short debrief conversation or create a shared file for an idea swap where you all share one idea that you plan to try. \nThat is one way I’ve actually gone back to some of those documents where someone decided to create one for everyone who was in the room and say\, “Hey\, here’s a shared document that I created with my idea. Go ahead and add yours.” \nI’ve actually gone back to them months later too\, to try something new. \nSo that’s it. You just reach out to a participant\, instructor\, or colleague. \nCORAL OWEN: Good deal. Simple is easy. Love it. Awesome. Well thanks so much for guiding us through\, and yeah\, that’s it for this episode. \nSo thank y’all for joining us\, and if you did enjoy this episode or [00:06:00] find this practice helpful\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or colleague. \nTill then\, we’ll be back next week with a new episode\, and be sure to keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of OneOp and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/from-networking-to-meaningful-connections-learning-together/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/poppy-4896275_1280.jpg
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250814T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250814T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250821T100139Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20251208T164929Z
UID:10001616-1755151200-1755190800@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Bridging the Gap: Military Kids and School Communities with Mark Paolicelli and Dulce Carrillo
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]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[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 34) \nWhen a redistricting proposal put military children’s routines at risk\, two communities came together\, transforming crisis into collaboration. Discover how a proactive partnership made all the difference. \nJessica Beckendorf welcomes Mark Paolicelli (former Deputy Base Commander for joint base Meyer-Henderson Hall) and Dulce Carrillo (Supervisor of Community Partnerships and Engagement at Arlington Public Schools) in this special episode\, sharing their story of coming together to solve a collective challenge that affected each of their respective communities. \nWhen a redistricting proposal threatened to disrupt the school experience of military kids\, little did anyone know it would spark a dialogue that led to meaningful\, long-term partnerships. \nHear firsthand how Mark and Dulce navigated misunderstandings\, built bridges\, and turned neighbors into allies – all in the name of supporting military-connected students. \nTheir story offers timely lessons in resilience\, communication\, and the power of coming together for a common cause. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\nSend us a text\n\nOneOp Academy is a free online series designed for anyone interested in positive change\, whether you’re an educator\, community leader\, student\, or just passionate about supporting families. \nThis year’s Academy spotlights the unique challenges facing military connected youth\, from mental health to resilience education to community support. \nExplore the 2025 OneOp Academy and register today at oneop.org/series/2025academy[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hello\, and welcome to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica Beckendorf. Our guests today are Mark Paolicelli\, former Deputy Base Commander for Joint Base Myer Henderson Hall\, and Dulce Carrillo\, supervisor of Community Partnerships and Engagement at Arlington Public Schools in Virginia. Dulce and Mark were part of an effort that began as a crisis from the base’s perspective and ended in long-term understanding and partnership. \nThough they were neighbors\, the base and Arlington schools had little interaction until a redistricting proposal threatened to move military kids from their usual school. We’re excited to learn more about how this story unfolded\, which resulted in improved support for military kids\, and raised regional awareness of their unique challenges. \nHi\, Mark and Dulce. Thank you so much for joining us on Practicing Connection. \nDULCE CARILLO: Hello\, [00:01:00] Jessica. Great to be here. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah. Thanks for having us\, Jessica. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, let’s start by getting to know you both a little bit. Can you share a bit about your backgrounds and your connection to the base in Arlington schools? And maybe Mark\, I’ll start with you on this. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Sure. My name is Mark Paolicelli\, as previously stated\, I’m a retired lieutenant colonel in the United States Marine Corps. My last assignment before I retired in 2022\, I was the Deputy Joint Base Commander for Joint Base Myer Henderson Hall. Now this is an army owned installation\, but because it’s a joint base with the Marine Corps\, that’s why a marine officer is the deputy commander for the base. And I was in that role from 2018 until my retirement in 2022. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And Dulce\, please share a little bit about yourself and your connection to the base in Arlington schools. \nDULCE CARILLO: Yes. I’ve been working for Arlington Public Schools since the fall of 2016. I had been assigned by our superintendent\, then Superintendent Patrick\, Dr. Murphy\, [00:02:00] as a representative to the Military and Veterans Affairs Committee. So I was learning and getting to know members of that community including Lieutenant Colonel Paolicelli\, and that led to starting to learn about and how we can serve military students better. How we can be a system that supports students and looks out for the interest of military connected students. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. Well\, let’s think about before the two of you were assigned to get involved. What was the relationship like between the base and Arlington schools before this redistricting proposal\, and what concerns did the proposal raise? \nMARK PAOLICELLI: So how I would describe our relationship was we were neighbors – Literally\, the headquarters for Arlington Public Schools is right outside our main gate. So we could walk there from our main gate. But we were neighbors that were\, I’d say\, friendly and cordial to each other\, but we didn’t know each other. \nWe [00:03:00] coexisted very closely. But we didn’t really have a relationship\, at least to my knowledge\, because a lot of our kids\, they’re enrolled in Arlington schools. Those families dealt with the Arlington school district on their own. So the base leadership and the base really didn’t have\, you know\, any interactions with Arlington public schools. \nDULCE CARILLO: Yes. No\, I totally agree. I think we were neighbors\, but we were not\, certainly not meeting on a regular basis or discussing issues that were pertinent to military connected students. That said\, the commander Kimberly Peoples\, Colonel Peoples would come to our events. I really always enjoyed seeing her. \nShe would be invited to an administrative conference or certain events and I would see her at our whole child conferences. So that was something that I loved and I was interested in learning more about\, but certainly at that time we were not having meetings. Just bumping into each other basically. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah. I’ll agree. And I’ll follow up\, you’re right there were events that we would invite each other to\, [00:04:00] whether it’s like the base change of command or certain events that Arlington Public Schools would have\, that we would extend invitations to. But again\, I don’t think we had a really dedicated relationship where we were talking on a regular basis. And I don’t think up until this point the topic we’re about to talk about\, I don’t think there were any things that came up for\, you know\, kind of forced us to have a conversation with each other\, other than just being cordial and friendly with each other. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, and I’d like to set the stage even a little bit further. Mark\, you and I have talked in the past\, and as I recall\, there were not very many kids that were in school that were living on the base\, but there was a presence of children because of a daycare. \nAnd I wonder if you could just explain a little bit about that dynamic\, and how it contributed to the need to connect. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Sure. Yeah. So Joint Base Myer Henderson Hall\, the army side of the base\, previously known as Fort Myer\, or the residents that live on that base are the army’s senior most leaders\, and honestly the military’s senior most leaders\, [00:05:00] so five out of the eight Joint Chiefs of Staff live within our fence line. And so all the other top generals from the Army reside on the base. \nAnd so because of that\, a lot of these are older and senior military officers. Most of them have kids that are grown or that have moved out that are in college or whatnot. So the base’s children population was only about 30 kids that actually lived on the base. Aside from the residents\, we have the largest daycare center in the Department of Defense and our early child development center hosts about 550 kids when we’re at full capacity\, and that’s both infant care and toddler care. \nAnd then the other side of the facility is the school age side which are\, K-through-Eighth Grade that get dropped off at the daycare center in the morning\, hop on Arlington County buses\, go out into the county and then at the end of the day\, they’re brought back to the daycare [00:06:00] center. \nAnd now keep in mind military families work pretty long hours. So our daycare center was open from six o’clock in the morning until six in the evening. And those before and after school care kids you know\, really relied on the care of the center to be able to hang out there and do afterschool programming until their military parents could come pick them up. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I would love to also dig a little bit into the redistricting proposal itself. Dulce\, maybe you could talk a little bit about the school’s needs for the proposal and Mark you could maybe talk a little bit about the response that the base felt they needed to have to support the military kids. \nDULCE CARILLO: Yes\, to give you some background\, so it is basically a responsibility of the school district to ensure that we have balanced enrollment in our school buildings. Each of our school buildings has a certain number\, a capacity of students fit in a school. And our demographics are constantly changing where people are moving and [00:07:00] coming. \nAnd so every couple of years\, and this fall is no exception\, when a school gets too crowded and we see extra room in another school where there are empty seats in classrooms\, we do a boundary change. And that means that we shift some students to other schools to balance this enrollment\, otherwise it could balloon up and you know\, we need more trailers and things like that while other schools are kind of empty. \nSo boundaries are one of the most painful things that we do as a school district and we take a lot of care\, since there are a lot of competing demands. How do we ensure that all of our students\, none of them are overburdened\, but also that some schools are not overcrowded\, while others empty. \nSo that was the backdrop. And also prior to this example\, we were really bursting at the seams. Our enrollment had been growing and growing. We were looking at 30\,000 student enrollment and not enough seats. So I think that was part of the [00:08:00] reason we’re not seeing that now\, there’s less pressure to do severe boundary moves because we’re not under that type of pressure. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: And so Mark\, when did it become known that the redistricting proposal was going to affect the military kids on base? And maybe it affected more than that. If you could maybe describe that reaction you guys had and why you felt like it was really important\, right? Even though there were only 30 kids on base. Like\, why was it really important for you to step in? \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah. So I was made aware of this in the fall\, when Arlington was holding town hall meetings\, and really the base leadership was made aware of it from a lot of concerned military families that were going to be impacted by it. So I don’t know if you know anything about running a base\, but every decision you make\, and everything that happens around the base\, the base commander and the deputy commander\, you hear an earful from your population and the people that you’re supporting\, and the people that use your services. \nSo\, as you can imagine\, you [00:09:00] know\, the redistricting thing was a pretty emotional event for some of our military families. They were very vocal about their concerns and the impact that this was going to have on them. The unique thing with military families is these families are assigned to a location for two or three years\, and then they pick up and they move again. \nSo\, I think it’s pretty well known that military kids are very resilient. Because they’re always doing that. That’s the lifestyle that they’re used to. And so for us\, our concern when the base leadership was informed of it was\, is this really necessary? Can we talk to Arlington\, just kind of find out a little more about it? \nBecause at that time\, to be honest with you\, I didn’t understand the redistricting reasons. I do now. Especially as a parent of a 7-year-old\, ’cause we just went through this where I live. So I fully understand it and I completely understand why the county needs to do that in order to make sure that they’re operating within capacity\, so that they don’t have some schools that are bursting at the seams. So [00:10:00] anyway\, the base commander\, she was notified and at the time she was really concerned that we just needed to understand this. And she knew that it needed the base leadership involved. So she tasked me to be her point person on this\, to dig into it\, find out exactly what was going on\, to understand the situation a little bit better so that really we could communicate back to our military families using the services on the base of\, “Hey\, this is what we’re doing\, or this is why Arlington is doing this.” Really to inform them. So that they weren’t just dealing with emotions\, you know what I mean\, or acting out on their emotions. And our standpoint from the beginning was just understand it and then see if this was concrete or if there was room for\, you know\, maybe a compromise. \nBefore we even got to that\, we had to understand the issue and why Arlington was making that decision. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: It sounds like you were really looking for where are the gaps and how can we bridge them? And a lot of that kind of back and forth communication and helping everyone understand why redistricting needed to happen is [00:11:00] one of the ways you do that. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah\, and we were very cautious too\, right? We never go in\, or at least Colonel Peoples – now Major General Peoples was a fantastic base commander and a great boss. She’s a very\, compassionate leader. And so\, she didn’t take the stand of\, “We’re the military and we should be treated differently and special because we wear a uniform.” She sincerely looked at it from\, “Okay\, let’s understand this first. And then if there’s room for compromise to alleviate these military families from having to pull their kids out of another school and go to a different school next year\, you know\, is there room for compromise?” \nAnd at the very least\, make sure that Arlington County understands kind of the uniqueness of these military families. ‘Cause like I said\, when we talked earlier\, that we’re neighbors. There’s a lot of people that I engage with from Arlington County that have lived in Arlington forever and have never stepped foot on the base. And I think a lot of these bases are really [00:12:00] foreign to their neighbors because they never get access to the base. They never get to go on and see the services or the soldiers or the Marines. So it’s kind of this foreign place that they know it’s over there. \nThey know it’s guarded\, but they don’t understand it because they’ve never had the opportunity to\, you know\, be on the base or engage with the base community kind of thing. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: So if I could just add one thing to what you’re saying. Earlier you mentioned that military kids\, like it’s pretty well known that they can be very\, very resilient. And I’ll just say as a former military kid\, it was eons ago at this point\, but it would have been extra hard to have had to – midstream in the middle of that two years or three year stint – to have had to switch again. \nIt really would have been difficult. And so that said I’m wondering Dulce how did the school district start to begin to understand the unique challenges that military kids face? \nDULCE CARILLO: It was through these conversations\, and I totally agree that Colonel Peoples was an amazing\, compassionate leader who really had [00:13:00] very strong influence\, but it was more soft and diplomatic influence. And of course she sent Mark Paolicelli\, who’s a similar very strong leader\, but with a lot of curiosity and\, you know\, willing to listen and dialogue before making demands\, which\, you know\, could have been worse I think\, had we sort of come to a standoff. But I think these conversations were important for all of us because we as a district also needed more understanding of the particular situation of military students\, and we knew it at a certain level. \nWe know students because we see them\, they enroll and then they have to leave\, or sometimes they don’t\, you know\, they enroll late in the summer or even sometimes mid-year. Not that we didn’t know\, but because we live in the DC metropolitan area\, and we also have a lot of diplomatic kids who are different\, they’re not military\, but they are also moving quite often. It’s a very dynamic region. You know\, military students having this burden seemed [00:14:00] kind of like\, “We have a bunch of students and if we allow this group to say we can’t move\, what are we gonna do with these other students who also have these needs?” \nI think that was one of the things we were hearing in terms of how much flexibility can we have and still balance the capacity at our different campuses. \nI just wanted to kind of echo what Colonel Paolicelli said about the base being a foreign place. I think you’re totally right. I mean\, we are neighbors\, but personally I thought that we were not allowed on base unless we were invited and escorted. It looks like a very secure place that\, unless you know you have an opportunity to create relationships and visit\, it feels like it’s out of bounds and you’re not supposed to go there and don’t try to go there and you know\, it’s not for you. It’s only for military. That is the perception. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That actually I think is a beautiful segue into a burning question that I have\, and that is what were the main [00:15:00] challenges in building this understanding? I mean\, you guys have made it sound beautifully easy but what were the challenges in building this understanding between the base and the school officials and how were they overcome? \nMARK PAOLICELLI: It sounds difficult\, but it was really just talking to each other\, right. And understanding each other. You know\, one of the things talking to the folks with Arlington at the time\, I realized that when they were looking at their data for redistricting\, they were looking at the 30 kids that lived on the base and their proposal was\, “Hey\, we have to pick up your kids and bus them to their school anyways\, so it doesn’t matter\, is it really a big deal that we’re\, going to bus them to a different school\, right?” \nThey’re not walking to school. Like other Owens County residents\, we have to go\, come on the base and pick them up. “So what’s the big deal about\, you know\, moving them to a different school?” Talking in our initial conversations\, I quickly realized that they were only looking at the 30 kids that were residents [00:16:00] and the 180 kids that were before and after school care in our daycare center that were also Arlington County residents who attended our before and after school care program. That was a kind of a blind spot for them. \nThey didn’t realize that this impact wasn’t going to just impact the 30 kids who lived on the base. It was also going to impact the 180 kids that were using the before and after school care. That opened up their eyes. And quite honestly I was even more nervous because they’re like\, “There were even more kids that we weren’t factoring in.” \nAnd so we were able to pull together the data for them of\, “Here’s our list of all the kids that are either residents or patrons of the before and after school care. Here’s a by name list of everybody.” If memory serves me right\, I had a by name list. I know I had the numbers. And so really kind working together with them\, with like\, say\, “Hey\, here’s a population that we weren’t counting in.” \nAnd then I was able also\, actually\, yeah\, you’re right. Sorry to go back. I [00:17:00] didn’t share the names. I was only allowed to share the numbers. I was able to go in and find out from the families when they were leaving. Right. And that was another thing that I think the decision makers that wasn’t part of their calculus was like\, yes\, when the decision is made\, there’s 180 kids that are impacted\, but out of the 180 kids\, 60 of them are what we call PCS\, which is a move. Meaning their families are gonna get orders. So next year they’re not gonna be students anymore. They’re going to move somewhere else\, right. So there’s a lot of variables that\, quite frankly\, it was quite a science project for me to dig into to get that data for them\, to get that data over to Arlington Public School so they can make a more really informed decision and at least in my opinion\, a more informed decision. But again\, those are the uniquenesses of it\, right? \nThere’s the base population\, you know\, that live there. There’s the population that used the before and after school care. And then on top of it\, to add even more complexity to it you have some [00:18:00] kids that aren’t gonna be around for the next three years. And then even more kids\, what we don’t know coming in\, right. You really had to go through it with a fine tooth comb. \nAnd I was fortunate still to this day\, grateful that the leaders at Arlington County Public Schools were at least willing to talk to me. And hear our position and our considerations \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, and so Dulcey I’d love to get the similar thoughts from you on what were the challenges from the school district’s perspective? Like what were some of these challenges in the building? That understanding? \nDULCE CARILLO: I think one of our challenges was that several different departments were involved in this. So we had one department called the Department of Planning and Evaluation\, and they’re the ones working on the data\, working on\, you know\, numbers\, really trying to make everything work. But they’re kind of blind to\, like my department\, we’re school and community relations. \nWe’ve got the relationships\, we have more ability to meet with\, and build conversations. So planning valuation is [00:19:00] more policy. We can’t break the policy. It is more black and white if you want to say\, because they’re dealing with so many variables that they don’t really want to hear. \nIt’ll throw off their models if we give them all these exceptions. So it’s their job\, you know\, to be responsible and to say\, “Hey\, we’re running all these models and we can’t have all these exceptions to these models or our plans won’t work and our schools won’t be well distributed.” \nAnd then you throw in\, we have a registration office. Which is our welcome center. These were separate offices at the time where they had very strict registration rules. A person cannot register until they can prove that they have an Arlington address\, and once they have an Arlington address\, they are sent to a school that is within their boundary. \nThese are all the regulations for registration. So if you live on base\, you go to this school. If you live in another part of the county\, you go to that school\, unless you’re in a lottery program. So they’re also [00:20:00] trying to juggle where all of the kids are. And then we had obviously the superintendent’s office\, which got involved when the leadership at the joint base came forward and said\, “Hey\, you know\, please intervene. We want to do some talking.” \nSo we had basically four departments trying to educate one another and each of us bringing a different perspective to that conversation. Some are saying\, yes\, we should make this exception. And others saying we can’t\, there’s so many other exceptions. So it was a bit tricky also internally for us. And I don’t know what Mark’s numbers were\, but some of the arguments that\, you know\, I was getting pushback on was saying even though the kids attend the childcare center\, they’re not necessarily Arlington residents\, and we don’t have any room to be accepting kids whose parents might be working at the Pentagon\, say\, but are actually not living in Arlington. \nThey’re not supposed to be registered at our schools at all. So we had to really share\, and your research helped a lot to say\, “Here are the kids who do live in [00:21:00] Arlington County\, who will be going to our schools\, and we can make the exception to keep them in a community so they don’t feel further disturbed from\, you know\, the normalcy they’re trying to create in their two or three year posting with us in Arlington.” \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah\, Dulce\, I remember that. Because this was an educational adventure for me as well\, right. So when that came up\, I was able to dig into our population and really dispel that rumor or that belief that no\, if they’re a student at Arlington Public Schools per Arlington’s policy\, they are also an Arlington resident. \nSo we were to dig into that\, because that was a question and a concern understandably from the school side\, do we have students in our schools that aren’t Arlington County residents? And we were able to dig through that and validate that for you\, that we are in compliance with the policy. \nDULCE CARILLO: Correct\, we hadn’t dug into that data. In fact\, as a military liaison of sorts\, I did have access to numbers. [00:22:00]I know how many kids were at each of our schools because I was told for security they were not releasing that information. Virginia policy\, we ask every student when they start school\, are you military connected or do you have the data. For security they told us we don’t release that information. We don’t want any schools targeted in case there are more families than another. So I actually for the first time had that information from the base who willingly shared and said\, you know\, we published that and it helped us understand that 5% of students are military connected\, a significant number. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Wow. It sounds like you guys had some things that really contributed to the success of this effort\, and what I’m hearing right now is that there was a willingness to spend the time on it\, right? Because conversations take a long time. And I’m [00:23:00] hearing that there was also an openness to hearing what the needs were on both sides\, and openness to hearing about data that maybe you had never seen before. And also there was a commitment on both of the leadership’s sides toward the effort\, like a commitment to learning more and to doing more. \nDoes that all feel true for you guys? Is there something else in your magic sauce of like\, what contributed to the success? \nMARK PAOLICELLI: I mean\, really it is just having the conversations\, right? And I said it earlier\, you know\, I was so grateful and am grateful that they didn’t just say\, “Hey\, this is our decision\, deal with it. See you later.” And I think that you hit on it with the willingness and openness to at least engage in a conversation. And then\, to understand it better because I needed to understand the reasons for the decisions that were being made so I could communicate that back to our military families. Quite honestly\, you know\, I was resigned [00:24:00] to the fact that if the decision was made that\, “Hey\, sorry there will be no military family exception to policy and the kids have to move.” You know\, I may not have agreed with the decision\, but at least I could understand it and be able to communicate that back to the families\, right? So that they had the facts and they understood the reasons why the decisions were made. \nSo again\, you know\, we had to understand this a little more\, because it was impacting families for the three years that they’re assigned to our base or their children are patrons of our daycare center. If we can do something to help them\, and at least ensure stability for while they’re assigned to our base\, then we’re gonna do everything in our efforts to try to accomplish that\, right? To try to support them in that effort. \nDULCE CARILLO: I would like to add\, Mark\, that I think it was precisely that attitude that came through and the fact that\, you know\, the compassionate leader in you and in Colonel Peoples made it a lot easier for our leadership too\, to be [00:25:00] compassionate and be as flexible as possible because we wanted to figure out\, I think it makes it easier. \nWe get demands from all sides\, and sometimes the demands are people who are not listening. They want to share their needs\, but are not listening to our situation and vice versa. And I think that this situation was not like that. And I’m going to credit you not only because we’re on this call\, but that the type of leadership where you were willing to listen\, understand and accept the outcome\, and yet advocate so strongly and with evidence and with research and through conversation one-on-one\, I think really helped. \nNot every leader may have been able to get through that way because that does matter\, being a great listener\, being understanding\, not only sharing your needs\, but listening to understand others’ needs as well. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: I’m greatly flattered by your comments\, Dulce\, thank you. And I’ll say\, during our conversations we also [00:26:00] recognized that we have a lot in common\, because the decisions that Arlington County public schools are making are very similar to the decisions a base commander makes\, right? About what’s best for your community. \nAnd then you have to stand in the Town Hall and justify yourself of everything\, of every decision you’re making. So I think we found that in common ground with Arlington\, because we get it. I’ve been there too\, right? You make a decision and then you’ve got a lot of concerned folks that are saying\, “Why did you come to that decision? Well\, what about this?” Or\, “Have you considered X\, Y\, and Z?” \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hmm. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: And that’s being a leader\, serving a community\, you have to be able to articulate that. But I’m not going to lie\, it can be frustrating at times. Only because it’s unique. It’s a unique command because\, you know\, people think of the military and they think\, okay the commander makes a decision and nobody questions it\, and everybody executes. \nA base commander and a community leader\, it’s very different\, right? And it’s not that it’s a burden to explain [00:27:00] yourself of why. But you have to be able to understand the needs of your community\, and when you make decisions\, be empathetic and have that in mind\, but also communicate that of why the decisions are being made. So yeah\, that was the common ground that I think we found\, that we had with the leadership of the school district. \nDULCE CARILLO: Indeed. And when you say you know command at base\, I think how unique Arlington public schools in Arlington County as a community is a very incredibly involved community\, very highly educated\, savvy. Every decision that we make\, we have to have a lot of research\, a lot of community input\, because the community members are engaged. In a great way. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah. \nDULCE CARILLO: But they will take us to task if we don’t explain why we’re giving someone an exception\, but not someone else. And so we have to be very careful as well in every decision\, because every family that gets [00:28:00] impacted is huge. It’s their child. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah. \nDULCE CARILLO: They’re not military connected\, moving them from a community they thought they were going to go\, now you get tears\, lawsuits\, people leaving our district and going to private school. I mean\, it is a huge deal. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah. \nDULCE CARILLO: These are delicate subjects in a very engaged community. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: But you know\, I would say this and you know\, with the engaged communities that we both have\, right? That we share\, they hold you to account\, right? So you better make sure that you do your homework and do your research and get your facts straight before decisions are made. Which is a good thing\, right? \nBut also on the flip side of it is like\, “Okay\, I get the facts together\, or when we present things\, I know I’ve done my homework\, I know that I can speak confidently behind the decisions that we’re making.” \nBecause I\, you know\, it wasn’t a\, just a gut thing and “Oh\, we’re just going with this\, right?” We did our homework and we got our facts together before we made decisions. There was a lot of [00:29:00] thought involved between leadership of both the public school and the base. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Wow\, there was so much that went into this. I would love to switch over to talking about what were some of those big wins or outcomes from this effort that you’re particularly proud of? And\, you know\, maybe were there any lasting wins? Were there any kind of things that carried on or grew out of this? \nMARK PAOLICELLI: I think from my perspective the big win was that Arlington Public Schools and the leadership there aren’t just our neighbor in passing\, there’s actually a relationship built on trust and transparency. When I left\, you know\, I know the base commander was still continuing to engage and meet with the Arlington superintendent\, at least on a quarterly basis. With Dulce and I\, I think that a friendship has formed. \nYou know\, we started off not really knowing each other except for when we were at the Arlington County’s Military and Veterans Affairs Committee. But that relationship\, I think\, started with this incident or crisis[00:30:00] and because of that a strong relationship was formed and has maintained since then. And a friendship and\, you know\, I consider Dulce a friend\, a friendship and partnerships was formed throughout this whole thing. \nDULCE CARILLO: Thank you\, Mark. I want to echo that. I think the big wins were not only did we genuinely understand each other’s needs better. I think the lasting wins that\, as you mentioned\, there are quarterly meetings between the superintendent and the commander. And we’re now onto our third commander where we’re going to be launching those this fall. And there we have an opportunity when crises occur that we have these relationships and we bring the commander to a different school at least twice a year to see and to speak with military connected students to tell them how was their transition\, what are their needs. So it’s really become a learning tool for us. \nAnd our superintendent\, our new superintendent\, because we did switch to Dr. Francisco Duran. [00:31:00] He is very big on the Purple Star program. This is a Virginia Department of Education program where a school can be designated purple star\, that they understand the needs and support connected students. \nAnd that is a program that he has been working very hard to engage in\, that’s a lasting win. I think we’re now up to almost half of our schools that have applied and were awarded Purple Star status\, and our goal is to have one hundred go through that. That includes an investment in training our staff members about military connected students and particular circumstances. \nHaving programs that a student comes in\, the school counselors are made aware so that there are already students willing to have lunch with that student\, show them school\, tell them what clubs and activities are available. So that they don’t have to eat lunch alone or wait\, you know\, it’s very hard when you’re a child to make [00:32:00] friends. So we’re proud of our Purple Star program\, our quarterly meetings and genuinely increased understanding awareness among staff and\, you know\, celebrating the military child in April having proclamation military students. \nSo we’ve taken a lot of steps that are ones that you know\, when I’m gone\, things will continue. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Did a lot of that actually come out of this initial redistricting proposal in all of these conversations? \nDULCE CARILLO: They happened afterward\, I can’t say they were a direct result. I’d say when you grow closer to a community\, you build that trust. You’re both transparent. You have goodwill\, which I believe was there on both sides. That really opens up a lot of possibilities. We are looking for ways that we can serve and support\, we’re eager to do so because it didn’t leave a bitter aftertaste. \nIt wasn’t a [00:33:00] type of fight where we felt we were pushed into something that we really didn’t want to do\, or vice versa. I think\, again\, I’m gonna go back to investing in those conversations and to learning about one another. Really set some goodwill. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: I think Dulce\, you had\, I think two Purple Star schools when I started my tenure at the base in 2018. And now you’re up to\, you said 16. \nDULCE CARILLO: I’d have to count them and I’ll let you know\, but it’s about 16. We had one to be honest\, one. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: One. Okay. I thought it was two. Yeah. Okay. Wow. And then the other thing too\, Jessica\, I’ll say that because we had a relationship with the staff with Arlington\, it goes both ways\, right? So anytime they had issues\, like for example\, at the beginning of the school year when their bus drivers are having a difficult time getting through the gate\, because they have to go through the search lane and the bus drivers have to get vetted. I mean\, that’s something that we could help them with so that the bus drivers can make their routes on time. Get their bus drivers names. We can give them a trusted traveler permission after a [00:34:00] background check. So that they’re able to make their routes on time. But we didn’t know that was an issue. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, looking back then\, what lessons from this partnership would you share with others who are working to build similar relationships? It doesn’t have to be a military base\, but at least like military population and schools. What lessons would you have to share with people who are looking to develop similar relationships? \nDULCE CARILLO: I would say some lessons learned are one\, you know\, don’t make assumptions. Make the time to listen to all of your families and constituencies. Come to the school district\, be willing and open to learn. And in this case you know\, we learn so much. So there’s probably other communities and needs that we might not understand because we haven’t yet had the opportunity to do so. Also\, I think meeting quarterly is important\, because you want to have those relationships so when things do flare up\, you already have a direct call of somebody you know and [00:35:00] trust that you can have a conversation with to solve the situation a lot faster than if you’re trying to figure out who to call. \nSo I would say that\, and what keeps us motivated is that we are a school system that prides itself in serving every student\, from their own needs and assets\, and military students are no exception. I think they are one of the populations\, like several others\, where there are needs. We want to make sure that we’re ensuring stability for our students and serving them in a way that meets their needs. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. Just a quick note. It’s like\, one of the things I’m hearing in what you’re saying Dulce is something that we’ve said a lot on this podcast and that’s work on setting up and cultivating the relationships before you need them. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Yeah\, Jessica. I agree. I mean\, we have a saying that\, “A time of crisis is not the time to figure out who your counterparts are\,” right. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yes. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: And the only thing I would add\, I [00:36:00] think\, I agree a thousand percent of what Dulce said that those relationships\, establishing them and maintaining them are extremely important. \nBecause really\, you have to know the other side. And I think that there’s a perception on the military side that it’s “Our way and that’s it\,” right? So if there’s any base commanders out there listening to this I would say\, even though there’s a fence line that separates you from your community\, really that fence line is irrelevant. You have to engage with your community leaders\, both\, you know\, at the city or county level\, definitely with your school districts\, and the military community and what services they’re using from the county. \nI look at the difference between the military community and the civilian community and really\, that fence line should not exist\, So if that means you’ve got to go out of your comfort zone and go introduce yourself with your counterparts outside of your base\, then you need to do that. And if it’s not you as the base commander\, then have your deputy or your sergeant major\, or somebody\, [00:37:00] one of your senior leaders do that. To be your point person. \nA lot of bases have school liaisons. But as a commander\, I would say you need to join them once in a while and show an interest\, that you care\, because it’s going to impact your community on the base. \nAnd then the final thing I would say is open up your base to them. There’s a lot of people that think it’s behind this fence\, that they don’t know what’s going on there. So level the knowledge gap by inviting the community leaders onto your base\, host them\, show them around\, and there’s your entry point. You need to cultivate that. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, I think you told me once that you ended up hosting a meeting on base and a number of the people who attended from the school district had never been on it. \nMARK PAOLICELLI: That’s right. That’s right. Yeah. When we first started meeting with Dr. Duran\, the base leaders came to him\, to his office\, for our first couple meetings\, and then we hosted him on the base with his staff. We took them to the childcare daycare center and showed them around\, and then also showed him [00:38:00] around where the residents were. And then hosted him for a meeting. And I believe a lunch on the base. \nYeah\, that was a little surprising to me where people who’ve lived in Arlington County for decades have never been on the base before. They were never provided that opportunity. \nSo this is where I go back to the base leadership\, and any base leaders out there listening\, you need to recognize that and understand that there are your counterparts in your community. Who could be just like that\, that they’ve never stepped foot on your base. So they don’t know what you do\, they don’t know your population\, they don’t understand it. And it’s your responsibility to break down those barriers and establish those relationships. And at least to build awareness\, right? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Wow. So this podcast is called Practicing Connection and boy\, did you guys ever practice it on this effort! \nMARK PAOLICELLI: Well\, it was a team effort. It definitely was a team effort\, us and Arlington. And we couldn’t have done it without compassionate people like Major General Peoples and Dulce\, and at the [00:39:00] time Dr. Murphy. So yeah\, I think it was a win all around. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Wow. Well thanks so much to you both for joining us\, Dulce and Mark. I so enjoyed hearing this story and I really I feel like this could fill up multiple episodes with all the work you guys have done. \nDULCE CARILLO: This is fun to relive. Thank you Mark\, for inviting us and really bringing forward lessons because we’re always onto the next issue\, the next problem. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. \nDULCE CARILLO: And so I think that’s gonna propel me forward now\, because before the Purple Star point contact was a different person and I was the person going to the military meetings\, but now I’m both. \nSo I’m so looking forward to continuing to partner with the military organizations that help us support students. And even with military people themselves. I think we have a couple of schools where we bring in [00:40:00] young military officers to support athletics and things in our schools. \nI hope that we can expand that to build even deeper relations between us. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Ok\, well\, thanks again so much for joining us. Dulce Carrillo is Supervisor of Community Partnerships and Engagement at Arlington Public Schools in Virginia. And Mark Paolicelli is former deputy based commander for Joint Base Myer Henderson Hall. \nThat’s it for this episode. Thanks so much for joining us. If you enjoyed today’s episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend.[00:41:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Off and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”][/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/military-kids-and-school-communities-with-mark-paolicelli-and-dulce-carrillo/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/png:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/Practicing-Connection_Podcast-graphic-2.png
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250814T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250814T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250814T100116Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20250807T143912Z
UID:10001615-1755151200-1755190800@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Turn Learning into Action with "Spark\, Shift\, Share" Notetaking
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. The community is designed for people who support military families in a variety of settings both on installations and in our communities.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=”padding-4-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”3/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”Listen” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_raw_html]JTNDZGl2JTIwaWQlM0QlMjJidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzYyNjcwNCUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRmRpdiUzRSUzQ3NjcmlwdCUyMHNyYyUzRCUyMmh0dHBzJTNBJTJGJTJGd3d3LmJ1enpzcHJvdXQuY29tJTJGMjA5OTk4MyUyRmVwaXNvZGVzJTJGMTc2MjY3MDQtdHVybi1sZWFybmluZy1pbnRvLWFjdGlvbi13aXRoLXNwYXJrLXNoaWZ0LXNoYXJlLW5vdGV0YWtpbmcuanMlM0Zjb250YWluZXJfaWQlM0RidXp6c3Byb3V0LXBsYXllci0xNzYyNjcwNCUyNnBsYXllciUzRHNtYWxsJTIyJTIwdHlwZSUzRCUyMnRleHQlMkZqYXZhc2NyaXB0JTIyJTIwY2hhcnNldCUzRCUyMnV0Zi04JTIyJTNFJTNDJTJGc2NyaXB0JTNF[/vc_raw_html][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid”][vc_custom_heading text=”About This Episode” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][vc_column_text](Season 6\, Episode 33) \nDo you ever sit through a workshop\, scribble endless notes\, and then never look at them again?  \nDiscover a notetaking method that helps you capture what matters – and actually use it. Get ready to spark ideas\, shift your mindset\, and share your growth with others! \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Jessica and Coral introduce the Spark-Shift-Share notetaking strategy\, a simple yet powerful approach for translating professional development into meaningful action. \nInstead of just recording information\, learn how to capture what inspires you (“spark”)\, identify how it can change your practice (“shift”)\, and spread valuable insights through your network (“share”). \nIf you want your learning to make a real impact\, this episode is for you. Tune in for a practical walkthrough and ways to connect learning with action. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\nSend us a text\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]JESSICA BECKENDORF: [00:00:00] Hi\, thanks for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Jessica. Today we’ll be talking about an innovative note-taking practice that can spark new insights and enhance your impact. And Coral will be sharing a practice with us. Hi Coral. How are you? Did you see what I did there? Teaser? \nCORAL OWEN: I did\, and our audience will find out soon. I’m great. Thanks for asking. I’m actually just coming off my first\, and I’m air quoting here\, “real” vacation in several years\, where I actually fully unplugged\, and it was incredible. Highly recommend. I just feel so much more energized and creative\, and I think that really stems from just letting my brain decompress. \nAnd yeah\, just seeing some beautiful new places. So yeah\, that’s what we’ve been up to the last week. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: That sounds wonderful. I think I shared with you just a couple minutes ago that I think it’s been about 12 years since I’ve had like a [00:01:00] traveling full-on vacation\, and I can’t believe it’s been that long. But I’m also glad that we haven’t had any episodes about “taking vacations as a way to enhance your productivity\,” because I would be a massive hypocrite when it comes to that! \nCORAL OWEN: I think that might be a new episode idea though\, about the importance of unplugging. So let’s file that away for later. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I take vacation time. I just haven’t been anywhere in a while. \nCORAL OWEN: Indeed. Indeed. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, we’d love to hear what’s inspiring you\, so please drop us a line at Practicing connection@oneop.org. We see and respond to every message\, and we can’t wait to hear from you. \n– break – \nLet’s learn more about note taking with the Spark-Shift-Share method. Coral\, can you tell us a little more about this practice and why you chose it? \nCORAL OWEN: Sure thing. Thanks Jess. So in our last [00:02:00] episode\, we kicked off a new series on making the most of professional development opportunities by talking about setting learning intentions before you go. So taking a few moments to ask yourself\, “What do I hope to get out of this?” Today’s practice builds on that idea\, and so we’re talking about how to take notes in a way that connects directly to those intentions\, and more importantly\, helps you move from inspiration into action. So a lot of traditional note taking methods were developed for academic settings. So think outlines\, bullets\, transcribing slides\, things like that. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Which are like the Cornell\, right? There’s a Cornell Method or something like that\, right\, of note taking? I remember this. \nCORAL OWEN: That sounds familiar. And yeah\, you know\, whatever methodology you’ve used for just kind of your classic note taking in the past\, in learning settings\, those are great for\, you know\, test prep or memorization or things like that. But the professional development setting really is different. \nAnd the challenge typically is not just remembering what was said\, but it’s knowing what to do with it. And so the Spark-Shift-Share method [00:03:00] is a simple framework that helps us move less from capturing everything and more to capturing what really matters for us and our work and our context and all of that good stuff. And then how to integrate those ideas into your practice and relationships and work. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Well\, I am excited to hear about this practice because I tend to be the person who writes two words down and then later on goes back to it and is like\, “What do those two words mean?” So\, tell us a little bit more. Let’s walk through the practice. \nCORAL OWEN: Yeah\, absolutely. So as you’ve likely gathered\, there are three steps to the strategy: Spark\, Shift and Share. The first step\, Spark\, takes place in the session itself. Whatever learning activity or professional development opportunity\, you’re tapping into the second and third steps\, shift and share respectively\, they take place after the session is concluded and you’ve had a little bit of space to regroup. \nSo let’s go ahead and just dive in on how to do all of this\, shall we? Step one: [00:04:00] spark. This is really what stood out and inspired you. So instead of filling a notebook with like a play by play of what’s being said\, you’re focusing your notes more with moments that grab your attention. These are like ideas\, quotes\, even questions that light you up and make you feel connected to what brought you to this session or talk in the first place. \nAnd as we’ve already noted\, you don’t need to write everything down. Just jot down what is giving you\, you know\, maybe a phrase\, a couple words\, or\, you know\, a direct quote\, paraphrasing what is giving you the most energy and direction. And again\, you’re doing this in the session itself. And it can be on a notepad or\, you know\, in the notes app on your phone or your tablet. \nJust capturing the moment that you’re in and just letting things as they hit you\, just do little brain dumps\, you know\, along the way. So the second step is after the session is concluded\, maybe you’re on your flight home or regrouping on your first day back in the office. We’re going to step into our [00:05:00] Shift. And this is\, you know\, how might whatever sparks you’ve captured\, how might this change your thinking or practice? \nAnd so like we already said\, you’re gonna go ahead and\, you know\, grab whatever you jotted your spark notes on\, and crack ’em open. And so once you’ve reviewed what you’ve captured that stood out to you\, ask yourself a few questions\, and you can do any or all of these. \nSo the first reflection point is\, what could I do differently because of this? The second one\, how does this change how I think about my work or relationships? And the third that you could reflect on is\, where could I try this even in a small way? Hopefully this is the step where we are beginning to move from passive listening to more active learning. \nAnd this shift helps you figure out what you might actually do with these insights that you’ve gained. And so finally\, step three is share. And we begin to consider who else might benefit from this\, this being your Spark [00:06:00] notes\, or your insights and how are you going to share it. So as you may know\, connection is a huge part of the learning process\, and this part of the method invites you to think beyond your own work. \nAnd so you might ask yourself\, who in my network or team would appreciate this idea? Is it something that I could bring to a meeting\, a mentoring session\, a coffee chat? And thirdly\, to consider how might sharing this idea deep in a connection or open up a new one\, and just really bringing this all home. \nThis step is reinforcing this learning and it helps spread useful ideas throughout your community\, your team\, or your organization. And that’s it. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I absolutely love how this starts to turn note taking into a full circle learning tool. Earlier I said that I tend to be the person who writes like two words down and later on I’m like\, “What do those two words mean?” But when you mentioned this is meant to shift from writing everything down that’s being said to writing just what sparks you\, \nI [00:07:00] I realize that I kind of waffle between the two words\, or writing everything down\, and neither one of those is like super helpful. So\, this is really turning note-taking into a full circle learning tool. And it’s not just something then that you do during a session\, but it’s something that helps you keep learning and connecting after it’s over. \nCORAL OWEN: A hundred percent. And I apologize if you heard me chuckling in the background\, Jess\, because I am very much like you. I either am just capturing like a word for word\, you know\, record\, or going\, “Huh? I don’t know quite what that Cliff Notes version meant\,” but\, yeah\, so I’ve used this a couple times\, in some recent learning opportunities that I’ve had\, and it really is just\, I know we say this with many practices\, but it’s so impactful. \nAnd\, you know\, even more so\, it’s just a way to stay present in the moment and reflect meaningfully afterwards. And it kind of has a ripple effect outward. You know\, the cool thing is too\, it doesn’t take any special tools. You can simply jot like a [00:08:00] Spark-Shift-Share in a notebook or a WhatsApp on your phone\, and really moving from an information overload type where you’re just\, you know\, saturated in information\, but being a lot more intentional in what we’re taking forward with us that really is gonna resonate with our work. And then moving it into intentional action with those around us and having that collective impact together. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Wow. Thank you so much. That’s it for this episode. Thanks so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend. We’ll be back next week with a special episode focusing on military kids and school communities. Until then\, keep practicing. [00:09:00]\nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Off and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/turn-learning-into-action-with-spark-shift-share-notetaking/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
ATTACH;FMTTYPE=image/jpeg:https://oneop.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/startup-594090_1280.jpg
END:VEVENT
BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=America/New_York:20250807T060000
DTEND;TZID=America/New_York:20250807T170000
DTSTAMP:20260502T065356
CREATED:20250807T100505Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20250804T194413Z
UID:10001612-1754546400-1754586000@oneop.org
SUMMARY:Meaningful Growth: How to Make the Most Out of Every Learning Opportunity
DESCRIPTION:[vc_row type=”in_container” full_screen_row_position=”middle” column_margin=”50px” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”column_reverse” scene_position=”center” text_color=”dark” text_align=”left” row_border_radius=”none” row_border_radius_applies=”bg” overflow=”visible” overlay_strength=”0.3″ gradient_direction=”left_to_right” shape_divider_position=”bottom” bg_image_animation=”none” gradient_type=”default” shape_type=””][vc_column column_padding=”padding-2-percent” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color=”#f7f7f7″ background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” column_position=”default” el_class=”podcast-sidebar” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/4″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][image_with_animation image_url=”147768″ image_size=”full” animation_type=”entrance” animation=”None” animation_movement_type=”transform_y” hover_animation=”none” alignment=”” border_radius=”none” box_shadow=”none” image_loading=”default” max_width=”100%” max_width_mobile=”default”][nectar_btn size=”large” constrain_group_1=”yes” open_new_tab=”true” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” solid_text_color_override=”#ffffff” icon_family=”none” text=”Subscribe Now” url=”https://www.buzzsprout.com/2099983/share” margin_top=”30″ margin_bottom=”30″][vc_column_text]Subscribe to the “Practicing Connection” monthly email to keep up to date on our latest podcasts\, blog posts and workshops. \nJoin the “Practicing Connection Community” on LinkedIn. 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Get ready to take charge of your learning with intention! \nIn this episode of the Practicing Connection podcast\, Coral and Jessica dive deep into the art of setting learning intentions to get more from your professional development experiences. \nJessica shares a practical reflection exercise designed to help you filter the noise\, focus on what matters to you\, and connect your learning to your real-world goals. \nWhether you’re attending a conference\, a webinar\, or any PD event\, discover how a two-minute pause can make your growth more personalized\, empowering\, and connected. \nTune in for step-by-step guidance\, insightful questions\, and actionable strategies to transform the way you learn. \nLinks\n\nJoin our LinkedIn group: https://www.linkedin.com/groups/12879756/\nSend us a message: practicingconnection@oneop.org\n\n[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][vc_row_inner column_margin=”default” column_direction=”default” column_direction_tablet=”default” column_direction_phone=”default” text_align=”left” row_position=”default” row_position_tablet=”inherit” row_position_phone=”inherit” overflow=”visible” pointer_events=”all” el_id=”trans”][vc_column_inner column_padding=”no-extra-padding” column_padding_tablet=”inherit” column_padding_phone=”inherit” column_padding_position=”all” column_element_direction_desktop=”default” column_element_spacing=”default” desktop_text_alignment=”default” tablet_text_alignment=”default” phone_text_alignment=”default” background_color_opacity=”1″ background_hover_color_opacity=”1″ column_backdrop_filter=”none” column_shadow=”none” column_border_radius=”none” column_link_target=”_self” overflow=”visible” el_class=”entry” gradient_direction=”left_to_right” overlay_strength=”0.3″ width=”1/1″ tablet_width_inherit=”default” animation_type=”default” bg_image_animation=”none” border_type=”simple” column_border_width=”none” column_border_style=”solid” column_padding_type=”default” gradient_type=”default”][vc_custom_heading text=”Transcript” use_theme_fonts=”yes” el_class=”trans-title”][nectar_btn size=”large” button_style=”regular” button_color_2=”Accent-Color” icon_family=”none” nofollow=”true” el_class=”read-it” button_id=”read-it” text=”Read More” url=”#trans”][vc_column_text el_class=”pod-trans”]CORAL OWEN: [00:00:00] Hello. Thank you for listening to the Practicing Connection Podcast. I’m Coral\, my co-host\, Jessica is here today as well\, and we’re going to be talking about setting learning intentions. Jessica is going to be sharing today’s practice with us. Jessica\, how are you? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Hey Coral. I’m pretty good. I’m actually really looking forward to this topic series\, because I’ve had a few professional development opportunities lately\, and I realize how long it’s been now since that’s happened. To be honest\, going to these professional development opportunities\, it all felt so hectic that I’ve really appreciated what I’m learning. \nAs we’ve been putting these episodes together\, the really nice thing is that even though it’s been a while since the last conference I attended\, I’d actually forgotten how refreshing and inspiring and motivating it can be to hear how others are approaching their work\, to talk with them in the hallways and to ask them questions about how they approach [00:01:00] their projects. \nIt’s really been nice and it came at\, I think\, the perfect time for me. \nCORAL OWEN: Those can be such great touch points. I agree. I remember actually we met at a conference\, I think it was in San Antonio\, a very long time ago. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah\, 2016. \nCORAL OWEN: I think so. I had first begun with OneOp\, and you weren’t even quite on the project yet. Look at us now. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: I know\, I know! \nCORAL OWEN: But yeah\, just so many wonderful\, just kind of a-ha light bulb moments\, and seeing people doing similar things\, maybe with a slightly different approach or angle. And it’s just like a great\, you know\, idea incubator and some fresh inputs to kind of reenergize your work. So I’m so glad that you’ve had that opportunity recently. Good deal. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Awesome. And that was a really good conference too\, I remember. \nCORAL OWEN: For sure. Oh man. And we would always love to hear what’s inspiring y’all\, our listeners. So do drop us a line if you’d love to reach out. You can reach us at Practicing [00:02:00] connection@oneop.org. We do see and respond to every message\, and we can’t wait to hear from you. \n– break – \nAlrighty. Let’s learn a little bit more about setting learning intentions. Jessica\, can you share a bit more about the practice you’re going to be discussing today and why you selected it? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. You know\, as a team we’ve been kind of going round and round thinking about how we can best support all the participants who will be attending our annual academy this year. And our co-producer\, Erin\, she’s\, you know\, new to the team\, within the first couple of minutes of a brainstorming session she said\, “Well\, what if we produce episodes about making the most of professional development opportunities?” I don’t even think we came up with other ideas because it just felt so perfect. The idea for this series came out of the recognition that participating in professional development can often [00:03:00] feel really overwhelming. Kind of like drinking from a fire hose. \nLike I just said before\, right\, it’s been a little bit hectic and overwhelming being at these opportunities. So with so much information coming at you\, it’s really easy to walk away feeling like you may have missed what mattered the most. That’s why we’re starting with exploring the practice of setting a personal learning intention. \nAnd that’s what this practice is all about. Even a simple two minute reflection\, asking yourself what you most want to take away can really transform the experience from just kind of an information overload into maybe some meaningful growth\, or some meaningful learnings and takeaways. \nAnd I would say that we see this idea of a learning intention\, and I’m saying we\, because I think\, you know\, this has been a very co-produced episode – We see this helping in several ways. First of all\, setting a learning intention can help you design a [00:04:00] personalized experience for the learning\, right? \nThe presenters have really great learning objectives\, but if you’re setting your own learning intention\, it can ensure that you get what you wanted to get out of it\, so that the content is really meaningful and relevant to you. And then part of the reason for that is that it helps you focus. \nIt helps to kind of filter the flood of content so that you can recognize and retain what’s most valuable to you\, because you’ve identified what’s most valuable to you. And I’d say the other thing that we see this\, potentially helping with is kind of putting you in the driver’s seat of what you want. So\, I mean\, because you’re in the driver’s seat\, you’ve been empowered to listen for the content that you really want to listen for. You have developed that personalized experience. \nYou’re able then to kind of possibly increase your engagement and the likelihood of applying what you’ll learn\, because of this empowerment and the focus you’ve been able to put on [00:05:00] the topics that are meaningful to you. And then finally\, it really encourages connection\, right? If you set an intention about what you wanna get out of this\, it encourages you to notice the opportunities to connect with your peers and to tailor the experience to collaborative growth. \nAnd we’ll talk more about this in an upcoming episode. We’ll dive into this idea of connection\, and making that part of your plan for making the most out of your professional development. \nCORAL OWEN: I absolutely love the intention for this episode. So can we go ahead and just dive right in? \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. So like I mentioned a little bit ago\, even doing a two minute reflection can really help. So I’m going to start with an approximate two minute reflection. And then I’m going to share some follow up questions that can help if you’re stuck or unsure about what you learned. So for this two minute [00:06:00] reflection\, you’re going to start with just taking a moment\, get out a piece of paper if you want to write it. \nYou can also just think about this\, that’s fine. Get out a piece of paper\, a pen perhaps. If you want to\, you can close your eyes\, take a couple of breaths\, and just think\, “What do I want to get out of this? How does this connect to my current work or goals? What has made learning hard for me in the past and how can I support myself this time?” \nIf you identify a couple of things that you need in order to support yourself\, you may want to set those things up for yourself\, right? So write down what you need\, and kind of pursue those things that will help support your learning. So let me give you an example. Maybe because it’s a webinar\, for example\, it’s easy to be distracted by email or other notifications coming in. \nSo [00:07:00] maybe you need to just turn off all notifications\, close your email. Or maybe you need to identify if there’s anyone else you know that’s attending\, where you could maybe organize a watch party\, a virtual watch party\, or a discussion group so that you’ve kind of committed to the learning. So\, whatever it is you need\, try to arrange for that so that it will support you. \nAnd then lastly\, try to capture this. I know I said you don’t have to write it down\, and you certainly don’t\, but you may want to capture it and write it down. So\, for example\, my intention is to learn practical strategies for leading meetings so I can help my department communicate more effectively. \nRefer to this at least once during the event and maybe revisit it at the end to reflect on your progress. So if you’re stuck\, we do have actually a short list of questions that you can use to help [00:08:00] you identify what might be most important to you. I’ll admit there are times when I can’t think of an intention because I’m feeling rushed. \nI maybe just got back to 15 emails\, and now the webinar’s about to start\, and I just didn’t have any time to do it. And so\, the set of questions that we have can help support\, you could do either before the session or after. And we’re gonna have them available as a download\, but I wanna share a little snippet with you. \nSo these questions help you do things like uncovering your personal motivation for being involved\, in this particular webinar or training\, connect your learning to real world context. So that’s kind of about how does it support the work that you’re doing already\, to explore growth and change. So what might you do differently in your role? And then to focus on connection and collaboration. Who can you connect with about this? [00:09:00]\nSo\, we have a set of\, I think it’s about a dozen or so questions that can kind of help you think through that and support your professional development. \nCORAL OWEN: This was so wonderful\, Jessica. Thank you so much for guiding us through these questions and reflection points today. \nJESSICA BECKENDORF: Yeah. You know\, I know that we do have so many great intentions when we sign up for webinars and conferences. I can’t tell you how many webinars I’ve signed up for and not been able to attend\, right? And I am always looking for ways that I can maybe just slow down my brain just a little bit. And it’s one of the reasons why I’ve really enjoyed diving into this topic\, because I think it’s something that I could work on quite a bit myself. \nCORAL OWEN: Absolutely. Just to be able to filter some of the inputs that we’re receiving and give it greater context into how it can apply\, I think is just always such a wonderful skillset to have at hand. \nWell\, that is it for today’s episode. Thank you all so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this [00:10:00] episode\, click the share button in your podcast app to share it with a friend or colleague who may find it of interest. \nWe’ll be back next week with a new episode\, and until then\, keep practicing. \nCREDITS: The Practicing Connection Podcast is a production of One-Off and is supported by the National Institute of Food and Agriculture\, US Department of Agriculture and the Office of Military Family Readiness Policy\, US Department of Defense under award number 2 0 2 3 4 8 7 74 3 3.[/vc_column_text][/vc_column_inner][/vc_row_inner][/vc_column][/vc_row]
URL:https://oneop.org/learn/meaningful-growth-how-to-make-the-most-out-of-every-learning-opportunity/
CATEGORIES:Community Engagement
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