Friendships That Build Belonging for Every Child

Research consistently demonstrates that friendships are a critical foundation for learning, social growth, and inclusion among elementary-aged students, particularly for neurodiverse children, including those with autism and other developmental differences (Biggs et al., 2023, 2025; McFadden et al., 2014). Peer-mediated interventions, structured peer networks, and other programs have been shown to improve social communication, increase participation, and foster authentic peer-to-peer connections in inclusive settings (Hassani et al., 2022; Thiemann-Bourque et al., 2012). For providers and educators, these findings highlight the importance of intentional practices, such as teaching peers to use responsive strategies, embedding communication supports, arranging the environment to support peer interactions, and designing small-group routines that prioritize connection, confidence, and a sense of belonging.

Friendships Grow When Peers Provide Support

Research has shown that when classmates are included as active partners in supporting social interaction, children with developmental differences engage in more frequent communication and develop stronger friendships (Biggs et al., 2023; McFadden et al., 2014). Structured peer networks with small inclusive groups of 3–5 children can provide predictable, repeated opportunities for interaction, helping children build confidence and practice social skills. For providers, intentionally creating these peer structures during recess, centers, or group activities is often more effective than leaving interactions to chance (Biggs et al., 2023).

Teaching Children to Be Responsive Makes a Difference

The development of friendship skills often requires guidance. Teaching elementary-aged peers’ simple responsive strategies, such as waiting, inviting turns, modeling language, and listening, can result in increased meaningful interactions and inclusive play (Biggs et al., 2025). Pairing these strategies with communication supports, like picture-based augmentative and alternative communication (AAC) systems or peer-mediated routines such as “Stay-Play-Talk,” gives neurodiverse children, including minimally verbal students, more opportunities to engage (Johnston et al., 2025; Thiemann-Bourque et al., 2012). Providers can implement these strategies by coaching peers in short, structured lessons and reinforcing skills during natural play, thus helping friendships develop and flourish.

Belonging Grows Through Intentional Supports

Programs such as the Circle of Friends demonstrate that creating small groups with regular opportunities to connect with classmates can foster inclusion and reduce feelings of isolation for neurodiverse students (Hassani et al., 2022). When schools intentionally combine social structures (i.e., Circle of Friends [Hassani et al., 2022], structured peer networks [Biggs et al., 2023; McFadden et al., 2014]) with communication supports, children have more opportunities to feel connected, valued, and a sense of belonging. This type of approach shows how intentional design, rather than chance interactions, can result in positive, inclusive environments that support all students.

Listening to Children’s Perspectives Matters

Children, particularly neurodiverse children, often experience friendships and connectedness differently than adults, frequently reporting more friendships than teachers recognize (Tsou et al., 2024). Asking students directly about their social experiences and including them in goal setting can help ensure that interventions are meaningful, relevant, and responsive to students’ needs. By centering children’s voices and lived experiences, providers can strengthen a child’s sense of belonging and ensure friendships are authentic.

Practical Recommendations for Professionals

1) Build structured peer networks.
Peer networks of 3–5 students, used during recess or in small groups, can increase children’s social communication skills when structured with clear roles and routines (Biggs et al., 2023; McFadden et al., 2014).

2) Teach peers the “what” and “how.”
Brief mini-lessons in using responsive strategies (wait, watch, join; model and expand; invite turns) can result in increased inclusive play and interaction (Biggs et al., 2025). Also, the Stay-Play-Talk peer-mediated routine paired with AAC supports has been shown to improve peer communication (Thiemann-Bourque et al., 2012).

3) Make AAC and supports accessible to all.
Using visual boards and programming simple phrases into ACC devices supports minimally verbal students by giving them accessible ways to communicate, while also normalizing AAC use for everyone (Vidal et al., 2021).

4) Target authentic play.
Embedding supports into natural contexts like recess or centers sustains engagement and reciprocity (McFadden et al., 2014). At the same time, paying attention to students who naturally gravitate toward one another can provide valuable starting points for pairing peers and supporting the development of friendship skills (Thiemann-Bourque et al., 2012).

5) Measure what matters—and include student voice.
Students often report more friendships than teachers recognize, underscoring the value of incorporating self-report alongside adult observations (Tsou et al., 2024). In fact, research shows that teachers may sometimes underestimate or even misidentify children’s peer relationships, making it essential to listen directly to students when assessing friendship and belonging (Meyer & Ostrosky, 2018).

6) Plan for plateaus and differences.
Use of collaborative goal setting and cycles of reflection can help when progress slows or when priorities differ between families and practitioners (Rodríguez-Medina et al., 2016). Including children’s perspectives, when appropriate, may further enhance the process and ensure goals reflect the child’s experiences and preferences.

7) Widen the circle.
Programs like Circle of Friends expand beyond skill practice to foster belonging and reduce loneliness (Hassani et al., 2022; Tsou et al., 2024).

8) Everyone matters.
Including a range of strategies that meet the needs and backgrounds of all students, making visuals accessible for everyone, and offering flexible family supports can increase the impact for each student (Chang et al., 2022).

Conclusion

The evidence is clear: friendships are foundational for elementary students’ social and academic success. Providers can support neurodiverse children by intentionally structuring peer networks, teaching responsive strategies, embedding communication supports, and listening to children’s perspectives. These practices not only build skills but foster environments where every child feels included, valued, and connected.

Reflective Questions:

1. How do I intentionally structure classroom or playground activities to encourage inclusive play and social interaction among all students?
2. What strategies have I taught peers to support neurodiverse students in communication, turn-taking, and play? Could these strategies be reinforced more consistently?
3. How do I assess the quality of friendships and belonging from a student’s perspective, not just through observation?
4. In what ways could structured peer-support programs be implemented or strengthened in my classroom?
5. What communication supports, like AAC, visual cues, or peer-mediated routines, can I make accessible to all students? Are students taught to use them effectively and efficiently?

References

Biggs, E. E., Carter, E. W., Mazur, A., & Brehm, M. (2023). Review of the evidence base for peer network interventions for students with intellectual and developmental disabilities. Remedial and Special Education, 44(1), 6–20.

Biggs, E. E., Carter, E. W., Mazur, A., & Shepherd, T. (2025). Teaching elementary-aged peers responsive interaction strategies within a peer network. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders. Advance online publication.

Hassani, S., Rodgers, J., & Ingham, B. (2022). The Circle of Friends intervention: A research synthesis. British Journal of Special Education, 49(4), 443–464.

Johnston, S. S., Ostrosky, M. M., & Hayslip, L. A. (accepted with revisions). Supporting friendship development and belonging for children with complex communication needs. Young Exceptional Children.

McFadden, B., Kamps, D., & Heitzman-Powell, L. (2014). Social communication effects of peer-mediated recess interventions for children with autism. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 44(3), 636–648.

Meyer, L. E., & Ostrosky, M. M. (2018). Identifying classroom friendships: Teachers’ confidence and agreement with children. Topics in Early Childhood Special Education, 38(2), 94-104.

Thiemann-Bourque, K., Brady, N., McGuff, S., Stump, K., & Naylor, A. (2012). Peer-mediated AAC instruction for young children with autism. Augmentative and Alternative Communication, 28(3), 182–199.

Tsou, Y.-T., Shepherd, T., & Biggs, E. E. (2024). Social connectedness and loneliness in school for autistic pupils: Student and teacher perspectives. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders. Advance online publication.

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