Written by: Jessica Beckendorf
If you’ve been part of a long‑running initiative, you have probably experienced cynicism at one point or another. Maybe it’s in a quiet eye‑roll when a “new” strategy sounds like a remix of the last one, or maybe you’ve heard the occasional “we already tried that.”
Cynicism makes it harder to stay connected to each other and to the people we’re trying to serve. The temptation is to throw more data, more urgency (hello, self-imposed false, short deadlines), or a better slide deck at the problem. Or maybe infusing some cheerfulness with a party or celebration. But one of the most powerful antidotes I’ve seen isn’t more information—it’s wonder.
On the Practicing Connection podcast, we’ve explored how reconnecting with wonder can spark creativity and help us see new possibilities, even in situations that feel very familiar. We talk about wonder as the intentional act of noticing what surprises, delights, or intrigues us. When we practice that kind of noticing, it loosens the grip of “this is just how it is” thinking and creates room for something different to emerge.
Wonder doesn’t ask us to pretend everything is fine. It lets us hold our frustration and our curiosity at the same time. We start asking questions like: “What here is still alive?”, “What might I be missing?”, or “What would really surprise me if it were true?” Those questions gently invite us out of defensiveness and back into possibility.
Here are three simple ways to experiment with wonder in a long‑running initiative that might be showing signs of cynicism:
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Try a “surprise round.”
At your next meeting, before you jump into the agenda, invite everyone to share one thing that surprised them recently in their work. It could be something a family said, a way a colleague showed up, or an unexpected outcome from a program. Keep it short and specific. Over time, this helps the group remember that novelty and change are already happening, even inside a very familiar structure.
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Introduce a “wonder question” when you feel stuck.
When the conversation starts to loop – “We don’t have enough staff,” “Families won’t come to that,” “We tried this in 2019”—pause and offer a wonder question. You might ask, “What’s one thing about this situation we don’t understand yet?” or “If something surprising were true here, what might it be?” You don’t need to land on the perfect answer in that moment. The goal is to open up just a little more space around the challenge.
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Collect ‘wonder notes’ in the field.
During a site visit, a family event, or an outreach activity, challenge yourself to notice three things you’re genuinely curious about. Maybe it’s how teens are choosing to use the space, who shows up early and why, or a question you keep hearing. Jot those down as “wonder notes.” Bring them back to your team and explore them together. That small habit can gradually build a culture where noticing and wondering are just part of how you work.
Cynicism tends to grow when people feel like nothing can change, or like their care doesn’t really matter. Wonder doesn’t erase the constraints we’re all working with, but it does help us see that there is more going on than our frustration. There is life and movement in our systems, even when they feel stuck. When we practice wonder together, we make it a little easier to stay connected—to our purpose, to each other, and to the communities and families we care about. If this idea resonates, you might enjoy our Practicing Connection episode on reconnecting with wonder to spark creativity, and then try one of these small experiments in your next meeting.
